Show Burlesque O Of OJ Italio Ethiopia By DALE L. L MORGAN Ethiopia bawls to the high heavens heavens heavens ens while Mussolini rubs hair tonic on the Italian chest Great Britain meanwhile talks loudly without saying anything and the League of Nations holds conferences and writes notes to Mussolini And nobody solves the problem Well then we give you the solution solution solution so so- lution to end all solutions Watch closely and applaud at the tIle right time As you know or if you dont don't you should and if you do how do you get that way the powerful Ethiopian nation having decided to colonize Italy has amassed a mil mil- lion men to do the job up brown and The league mumbles in its beard bean about sanctions and Italy meanwhile meanwhile mean mean- I n while calls calls' her black s black tribes tribe tribesmen abe men to arms Ethiopia has demanded that Ste semi-barbarous semi Ita Italy y be expelled from the u J league charging brokel Continued on page 8 the I pie pe Burlesque O Oy Of OJ 11 y Italic Ethiopia Ethiopia i i Continued from Page 4 iJ treaties and lots of other stuff which ich I forget Italy said Selassie imi impressively impressively im im- i to the Associated Press j and nd the League of f Nations is a Semi savage land which ha has utter- utter Ii Jy failed to fulfill its obligations i Those dirt dirty bounders arCI arc are I always picking on us Why can you feature it the Italian authorities authorities ti ties s make no attempt to curb the arming of numerous tanks and battleships battleships bat bat- il ships and airplanes airplane and what what- not not L' L Let me metell tell you he continued on poking the Associated Press in the ribs Italy is simply lousy with patriotism m and taxation And in inthis inthis th this free an and enlightened day the country actually staggers ers b beneath neath t the autocratic rule 0 of a single mn man i Besides the Italians are still r I living in a semi-savage semi st tte They need the benefit of Ethiopian i 1 pian plan civilization Why would j y uI u I 1 11 believe lieve it they eat eat- snails and oysters J tors tel'S and things like that My Hy 1 spies report that they spray themselves themselves them them- J selves elves with perfume instead of j bathing j T J If n nothing thing else proves th their r low J intelligence how about their tight i shoes their baggy dresses I I their voluminous pants and other other- such f ridiculous attire I have received V. V j rr reliable report that their arisAi aris- aris j Ai wears even t tail il coats and 1 1 stove-pipe stove hats j V Now I ask you isn't It the j Christian Christian duty of Ethiopia to bring 1 civilization to this barbarous land r II Ethiopia demands nothing less than 11 j full ull military control over Italy j Do you want to take a picture of me with my arm pointing up like this his t 1 Readi Reading between beye 1 l lines nes w we see seer r j that Ethiopia is JS masking her real I design which is t to to colonize It Italy ly it s and hd secure needed much-needed room f for r j expansion Now we are arc all all for Italy We believe that Italy forthe for forthe the Italians is the proper thing i i Ethiopia is just chiseling in on J the defenseless smaller power j f Th Theres There's res re's the problem Now watch us bring the solution out of our sleeve In short we suggest that Italy be given to Austria as a mandate This will secure for Austria necessary access to the sea while Italy will receive the benefits of Austrian civilization And everybody everybody everybody ev ev- ev- ev will ill be happy except Ethiopia Ethiopia Ethiopia Eth Eth- Italy Austria France Great Britain Brittin and the League League of N Na Na- a- a |