Show I APPLES A I 1 I Contributions to this column I should be hung on the hook in t the of e Chronicle office The They should be short original and be accompanied by br a pen If your own name is f funny enough use that thaL And remember the editor goes to the Pantages e every ery Friday too RUTHLESS RHYMES Little LittI Willie made a dash Fell in the lire burned Are burned d to an ash And though the 10 room o In Ingot got very chil chilly y Gee How v I hated to poke poor Willie Villie Dear old grandpa out in a car car P Pushed the throttle down too far After Arter the crash they excavated excavated- And found his watch unregulated ted Johnny slipped l on the fourteenth I floor floor floor- I Fell Fell and and smashed his apple core Then said mother standing there I tell you to use the stair Little Alonzo lonz up l In a balloon Felt the effects of a b bad d typhoon typhoon- Li tle Alonzo Is stiffer than stone Now said his brother I get his trombone Dear SkeE My sister wants a bid for the Trotters She wont won't have much to learn as she's already bow First down and ten to go as the student said when he paid the first installment on hl his T Tux Its a dead egg that cant can't see this yolk jolk GUFFAWS AND SALT WATER Chemise Use Chemise e. Use the word Euripides In ina a sentence I Undertaker Undertake in Underwear Underwear Eu Eu Euripides I pants and Ill I'll knocks you for da loop I De Dear r rA A In accordance with your Ruthless campaign campaign- Little Archie riding his horse Fell FeU off a cliff got cliff got bent of course Little Archie a lily Illy does docs clutch clutch- On Mondays Mondays' his Ma doesn't wash as much BUM Now y that would would-be football behave heroes heroes be- be he he- roes have been getting iceman jobs in the summer will it follow that I would-be would pugilistic champs will in future Join the marines Some men have their own opinions opinions opinions ions others are married J Gardener with gout Hey What do you rou ou think youre you're do Join doln In in my mr flower bed Bum in Bonnet Bonnet Dont Dont your our sign over oer there say to keep off the grass Flip Use Flip Use the word Mexican ina In Ina Ina a sentence ca Flop Mexican Flop Mexican of hard for me when youre you're away Girl in Garters Garters What's What's that new Dempsey song Boy in Barrel Barrel Oh Oh how I miss you OU tonight Because the money Suzanne Lenglen makes is NET profit does It follow that Gertrude Ederle's Income Income income In In- come is from watered stock If France would raise more storks and make less automobiles the race wouldn't be diminishing |