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Show NEVER AGAIN FOR HiEVI MR. BURLISON DECLARES HIM- SELF IN STRONG TERMS, ( , Good Reasons Why Ho Should Mako Resolution Not to Bring the Sun- v day Dinner From the City "Why, Henryl" , Thero was tho look of a man with a troubled soul In the faco of Mr. Henry Durllson when ho reached his homo ono Saturday evening. Tho smiling faco of his wlfo did not lessen tho look of grim determination In tho faco of Durllson, A wlfo with for less Intuition In-tuition than Mrs. Burllson had would havo dlscovorcd thnt something had gono wrong, nnd Mrs. Durllson asked, "Why, Henry, what has happened?'1 Durllson stopped Into tho vcstlbulo of his homo and dropped tho suit case ha carried to tho floor with a dull thud., His volco had an edgo llko a blado as ho said: "Something has happened that will never happen again If I llvo to bo so old that Methuselah will seem llko a kid when compared with mo. This 1b tho last tlmo I savo 15 conts by taking tak-ing that suit caso downtown with mo on Saturday and bring homo our Sunday Sun-day dinner In it to savo express charges tho very last tlmo!" "Why, Henry, what happened?" "Enough hnppcncd to mako mo tell you that I'll eat my Sunday dinner from an nrmclmlr restaurant with glittering glit-tering whito letters on tho window announcing an-nouncing frankfurters nnd'mashcd potatoes po-tatoes for 10 conts before I'll do any I Saturday marketing with n suit caso." ''Dut ydu haven't told mo what hap-. hap-. poncd." , "You would havo seen what happened hap-pened If you had boon with mo Just as Iircachcd tho subway stairs. I s'poso ; I nad forgot to push down tho clasps that help to hold tho suit caso to-I to-I gothor, nnd tho thing was so crammed full that It was too much for the Belt-locking Belt-locking arrangement, nnd tho thing opened right nt tho top of tho stairs.' "Why, Henryl" "You'd say 'Why, Henry!' If you had seen a six-pound Philadelphia capon traveling down thoso stairs, followed by thrco big yellow grapefruit and half a dozen apples!" "Why, Henry!" "A bunch of celery rolled down two or threo stops, and a man racing down the stairs stopped on it nnd slipped, nnd ho threatened to suo rao for damages! dam-ages! You will find tho print of a womanB boot hocl on that pound of butter, nnd I left tho dozon eggs I had bought on the subway stairs, for I would havo needed a shovol to have scraped thorn up aftor thoy had rolled down six. Iron slops! Ono of tho grapefruit rolled between tho feet of an old lady going down thq stairs, and sho gavo a yell llko a maniac and called for tho pollco! A grinning idiot caught up ono of tho grapefruit, and i flung it up to'vard mo, and two other men pelted mo with tho apples!" "Oh, Henry!" , "Tho bottlo of mnplo sirup spread over six of tho stops, and tho people carried It homo on tho soles of their shoes: and tho paper camo off tho soup bono 1 had bought, and I loft It lying at tho foot of tho subway stairs. All Is, this Is tho very last tlmo you over hear of mo saving 15 cents In thnt wayl My lacerated feelings aro worth nt least n quarter, and" "Oh. Henryl" r "I left half of my stuff In tho subway, sub-way, and tho other half will tasto bit- tor to mo whon I think of thnt gaping, gap-ing, grinning, giggling, tittering mob that saw mo standing thoro with my empty and open suit caso In my hand and nil that stuff travollng down tho 'subway stairs!" ' "Why, Henry!" Judge. |