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Show Deware the Conceited Man. "I don't enre for him," snld the young woman, snapping her teeth together to-gether decidedly "He's ono of thoso men that match." "Mntch?" murmured her friend who had Just confessed to u certain Interest In-terest In an acquaintance. "Yes; nil tho snmo color," was Uio answer, "shirt, hnudkerchlef, Bocks nil tho Bamc shade. Nono ot that kind for mine, thnnks. Just think how much time they would tnko In primping primp-ing every morning to get nil those things the same."--Now York Sua. All At It. LlPBv L Lady "Why aro you a tramp?" Frowzy Frogmore- "HccauBo I hain't got but 30 cents saved ylt for mo new automobile." This Prophetic Soul. Kindly Stranger "Sny, bub, you have been crying lioro for nn hour. What's up?" Small Hoy "I'm appalled by an Impending Im-pending catastrophy, sir, boo-o-o." Kindly Stranger "Hlcss my soul, what a child. And what is tho catastrophy catas-trophy to ho?" Small Hoy "Flshln' will bo good nbout Saturday, and I'm afraid tho weeds '11 havo to bo hoed out ot tho garden." Regular Jonah. "Do olo mulo th'owed Dr'cr Thorn-ns Thorn-ns head over heels Inter do mill pond on a 'gpfor rlz up en swallorcd hlml" "Too bad!" "Yes, but I reckon wo'll sco him ng'ln kazo do gator's dono crawled up on do bank en ho's lookln' mighty sick." Atlanta Constitution. Reflected Greatness. "What makes UJoiich bo proud theso days?" nsked tho seeker after truth. "Ho has just discovered that ho wears tho Bamo size collar that Roosevelt Roose-velt does," replied Mr. Conn. Portland Port-land Telegram The Lingering Kind. Mrs. Nowlywcd 1 don'J know whether to bnko a plo or n'cako for dinner. Chum Which will last longor? Mrs. Nowlywcd Oh, It doesn't mnko much dlfTcrcnco. Ono is ns bad as tho other! Detroit Frco Press. No Good for a Touch. "Thoro goos my friend, Jonos, tho human razor." "Is ho so sharp?" "No but ho's continually strapped." strap-ped." A Cheese With Life In It. YoaBt I seo an English coronor re-marked re-marked recently nt nn Inquest that It was strango what a largo number ot pcoplo died suddenly nftor oatlng oheoso. CrlniBonbonk Why don't thoy ont tho kind ot cheeso which has llfo in It? It can bo found, you know. A Sad Fate. i- ttrrtrnrvZzy f rut -.v f 'fffffilfffliMufr Tnpa Worm Hoavons! That llttlo boy Is using my son to flsh with! Ham. "My dear," wtid tho fncotlous cannibal, canni-bal, "I'vo brought homo n ham for dinner." din-ner." "That's what I call nddlng Insult to Injury," murmured tho shipwrecked actor, sptto voco. IIq wnB, howovor, In no position to protojRj&.i)ugvlllo Courlor-Joun.aI. -.-r |