Show kathleen norris N orris says when your husband ausba iid falls in love beu bell syndicate service Sen lc W I 1 1 i e U Z R also working there is a woman dau 81 aters attitude is that as he y very beautiful and U under t he present arrangement why it b she has my husband completely be all up and try the new one witched by KATHLEEN NORRIS HEN a man after twenty WHEN years of marriage gets tired of his wife neglects her hurts and insults her and openly admits that he wants to be freed to marry another woman what chatis is the wife to do this thi s a new problem but the shock and helplessness of it make it seem eternally new to every wo woman man to whom it comes sometimes this shock co coming mingto to her at a bad physical moment ph almost upsets her reason for a 6 time such aa a danger anger seems seem sto to me very close to emily baker who writes gefrom me from a big massachusetts mad manufacturing town emily will be fortunate if she can can hold to her reason lind and keep her balance in the months ahead IF she can I 1 think I 1 can promise her happiness and serenity when this time has gone by A quarter century of work emily is 60 she has been married 27 years she has a married daughter living in th the west a married son living near her and a young daughter and son still at home she married for love worked hard as a young wife and mother never had a servant j until a few years ago for a whole quarter century she washed cooked dusted made beds dressed babies served meals helped school children with their lessons packed picnic baskets trimmed christmas trees torn tom always came first with me says her tear stained letter dinner every night included something that daddy especially liked the children mastbe must be respectful considerate of him when he was tired they must remember his birthday they all love him dearly as indeed I 1 do or did my younger son now called by the draft is closely devoted to his mother boutmy unmarried daughter alida alicia thinks think sher her father can do no wrong and he is doing wrong now my good patient generous husband of a few years ago anda alida works in his office and also working there js is a woman some 10 years older than she divorced with a boy of five very beautiful and unscrupulous she has my husband completely bewitched feels Old Useless he began by being irritable limitable an and unreasonable with me and impatient because I 1 was so often nervous tired and sensitive I 1 feel myself to be old gray useless and homely these days and what I 1 see in my mirror only confirms the impressions pres but I 1 need tenderness so and the security of my homel and those are just the things he proposes to take away he is handsome rosy strong arid and young at 53 and seems years younger than I 1 tom wants a divorce he wants to bring his young wife here and have her keep house for him and alida when don goes to camp in june and I 1 go west to visit my daughter when her baby comes he says I 1 am to go to reno stay with betty as long as as I 1 like visit anywhere I 1 choose 1 I cannot express sto to you the forlornness of this thin prospect without him and without any one of the children who have been all my world for so many years 1 I 1 am not a baby I 1 amnot am not pitying myself but under no circumstances cum curn stances could I 1 compete in beauty end and charm with a fresh girl 01 0 28 who is flattering tom to the point when he is a complete tool fool over her alida is the sensible practical outspoken type her attitude is that LOST AFFECTION what would you do ij if your husband hits band tell fell in in love hie with another woman would you give him up or would you live a heartbreaking heart breaking existence knowing ow he no longer cared for you kathleen norris orris offers a far happier solution to a woman who has to lace face this problem alter after 27 years of married life she loves both parents but that as joan is madly in love with daddy and daddy with joan and as no blodys happy under the present arrangement ran gement why not break it all up and try the new one when I 1 cry about this and I 1 cant help crying sh she e says ah now mother men hate women to cry I 1 brace up all come out right you want arnt kohold to hold daddy if he wanted to tie afree free would yaul you 1 I dont know what I 1 want shame and pain and memories ot of the days when my babies anchus and husband loved and needed me are so mixed up in my heart that I 1 seem half crazy will you tell me what to do must I 1 surrender everything these years have meant to me to play the game the path to follow my dear emily playing the game in this case means continuing in your own home and your own life ignoring what you can of insult or hurt enduring the rest keeping yourself as calm and friendly as if none of these storms was raging over you and showing to an ungrateful man the patience and kindness that may inay be obtained in only one way the tway iway of constant prayer what tom is doing thinking asking and planning is not your immediate concern what YOU do think and plan most emphatically is see that you make the most of yourself in every way even a middle aged woman can be a pleasant sight if she is freshly and appropriately dressed even gray hair is charming charmin 9 if it is ii brushed to silky b rightness brightness and trimly braided or curled your interest in books current events radio programs pio grams gardens and flower arrangements the supervision of meals the details of club or hospital prison or charity or orphanage responsibilities will reflect itself in a brighter outlook on your own fortunate life brush aside the absurdity of i a man of 53 embarking upon a new love adventure tell alida you will not licit discuss it and assume once and for all the dignity to which your useful and beloved years entitle you years fears of harvest time lime ahead by all means visit the married daughter and welcome the grandchild make it a long visit make much of toms perhaps they will name the baby for tom write tom reports ask allda for news of the household in short proceed as nearly as you can along normal lines another few months or a year at most will see your yo physical unphysical and mental crisis ended and you will be in for years of health and activity and high spirits the fifties a are re wonderful years to a woman like yourself who has earned the right to spend her leisure in the ways she likes best they are a golden harvest time but to weather this particular time you must steel yourself to bear your husbands selfish inconsiderateness he will come back and you will forgive him and if the crystal vase of those early years of trust and devotion has been broken itis it is for you to show the world that the cracks very serious that they could be mended and that you meant it when you said laid 1 ady way back in 1914 for better bette or 0 for worse 10 |