Show HOME HAPPENINGS NEWS Or OJ THE WEEK Prof Kingsbury cracked his first joke last Thursday tr 1 Prof Merrills Merrill's voice has fallen in r temperature since the last report Mr McGhie has sprinkled thirteen 4 bottles of red ink over his English j papers At 10 minutes 13 seconds after eleven last Friday Prof Coray smiled for the thet t 7 first time in his life j The following is found in the margin of Prof Allens Allen's algebra page r II Use joke No 13 here t t Professors sors Cummings and Lyman o iY have exchanged funny stories about t the doings of their babies t t K The four hairs situated over Mr r I Lewiss Lewis's energy bump have been turned i gray in his fight for Saturday school c t- t 1 rte Prof Cummings Cummins Jr has a tooth i i t tl A debate has been arranged between i the Normal Class of 99 99 and the Normal te Society on the question Resolved i that the Normal Society should be abolished The petition nuisance is once more developing in the school Mr Reynolds Reynold's class in English b bare are reading the Papers The first fint year are the only ones who haven't a class organization Some visitors were here last week and asked for Prof Clark Inquiry developed developed developed de de- the fact that it was our genial II boss who was sought The only explanation explanation explanation nation is that his worn care-worn sunken face resembles bles that of the worked over-worked English i f professors Drop your brilliant ideas into the CHRONICLE box Dont Don't hide your light under a bushel Miss F r F r II Oh Oh look here I A must write two pages for English andI and I am two lines short II j Miss M M II Why fill them up with J kisses x x x x Mr Hansen working a difficult problem problem problem pro pro- i blem on the board II Professor I J must L have the present temperature Professor Cant you judge what it is Mr H H. H wiping the perspiration from frem his head II Well at the board it itis itis itis is about 1200 F. F The total debt of the Athletic Association Asso Association Asso- Asso is 59 Of this 4 42 is an old debt and 17 has been incurred this year Preparations are being made to clear off of this debt by th the end of the school year The following add appeared on the bulletin board oard II Lost one pair of bloomers Finder please return to gymnasium When a person has kleptomania so bad that he will steal a ladys lady's suit he should be sent to the Pen for lor life The CHRONICLE has sent a letter to the president of each organization in inthe inthe inthe the school requesting hi him m to appoint an editor to write up the doings of his organization It is our intention to open a department to be devoted to society and class matters the write-up write of each society to be furnished by one of its members The met last Wednesday in Room 28 About forty girls were present and listened to the following interesting program Inaugural address by President Box recitation Miss Winnie Winnie Winnie Win Win- nie Tibbs talk Miss Virginia Bush 99 Nor Grand Chief Sachem Next 99 f. f tine time the young ladies ladie will devo devote e part of their time to practical work with the needle and thread and the remainder in preparing an answer to the CHRONICLE question Evidently the class of English e havea have a great many classical illusions to look up The following conversation occurred occurred oc oc- occurred First Student t Do Do you want to discuss discuss discuss dis dis- cuss the gods a awhile while Second Student Stude t No but Id I'd like to cuss them a while A student while passing the sanctum door overheard the following conversation conversation conversation conversa conversa- tion II Now have her discovered lying dead with her lover kneeling beside her holding a smoking gun Then take him to prison to await death while the man who had really killed her leer jumps into a flying dying machine and escapes The student thought at first that he had discovered an anarchists' anarchists meeting but his fears subsided when informed that it was only a couple of Rhetoric II students ts forming a plot for a story This is t the e season of petitions the time when they grow and flourish like mushrooms after alter a rai rain n storm Big petitions little petitions Saturday petitions petitions petitions peti peti- Saturday anti-Saturday petitions all float about in endless variety You sit in the Library any afternoon with just one hour half-hour in which to get your Latin when a along ong comes petition No 1 Have you signed this petition yet You smile in appearance only and nd plank down your autograph Caesar made made made- How much do you want to sign for N Why what is the thin thing anyhow 1 You read the preamble at the top and dig up a quarter a a march through through- Say would you like to sign this petition petition petition peti peti- tion You curse under your breath h f and look up into the happy face ace of H. H C. C Lewis Lewis Down goes your signature re but bat you dont don't have to dig up again the the territory oj of the and conquered conquered conquered con con- Here is a petition I know you will want to sign You mutter several words which wouldn't lo look k wellin well wellin wellin in print snatch the petition from its owner jot down your name and hand it back You look up and see the ghost of Borgquist in the person of Young rapidly retreating So it goes on You sign everything that comes your way never knowing one from the other but you go to class and get a large goose egg all on account of the petition craze The following is an extract from the Critic II If If any anyone one in speaking to you used the word rat t ent its harmonious sound would assure assure assure as as- sure you that it was German and such it really is being taken from a Dresden paper Der Here is the explanation explanation explanation ex ex- of it Among it-Among Among the Hottentots the kangaroos are very numerous Many of them roam about the country free and respected others less fortunate are caught c and shut up in a cage hotter kotter furnished with witha a cover which shelters them from had bad weather These cages then are called in German kotter and arid the kangaroo once imprisoned imprisoned imprisoned takes the name of r- r One day an assassin was arrested who had killed the Hotten Hotten- tot mother of two wo children one witted half-witted the the other a stammerer This mother in the German tongue is designated bythe bythe by bythe the word from which it follows that the assassin takes the name of The murderer was shut up in a kangaroo cage beutel- beutel from which he shortly escaped But fortunately he soon fell into the hands of a Hotten Hotten- tot who went joyously to the mayor of the village exclaiming II I I have caught c the Which one asked several Thea The the mayor we have a lien Of Of which are you speaking Of the ter Then why couldn't you say at once that you had hadt t caught the zeter latten fatten gitter wetter J ate ale It is said that the fled in affright |