Show d HOME HAPPENINGS Better late than never 1 p v But better never late My moustache Ill I'll just sever sever tl I Twill ke keep p my looks all straight Didn't you hear it Thursday morning just as Mr came up the path Who swiped the CHRONICLE ink and took it up to room 32 Nelson brou brought ht it back Ames says it som sometimes times pays quite well to be small especially in the gym gym- We agree with him Last Monday morning Mr Isgreen was again at his classes looking none the worse for his married life Elections will be in order next week Students are already selecting candidates for presidents and secretaries of f the societies so so- Misses Evelyn Whitaker and Leah Reese and Charles Bush and G. G M. M Leonard have withdrawn from school We sympathize with Mr Lynn As a consequence of his accident in the gymnasium gymnasium gymnasium gym gym- his physician has advised him to discontinue athletics for one year We recently noticed one of th the jolliest jolliest jolliest jolli- jolli est of our circulating editors wheeling his way ward south-east-ward and we take it as being a sign of some ones return from Provo Miss P P to to Mr S S The street-car street companies dont don't s suit it me now Mr S- S S Why so Miss P P Because I have to pay to ride on the cars Where is the harm the maiden said Why do you censure me Why Why you forbid dear Charley Jones To call I cannot see Where is the harm the papa roared The maid stared in alarm Last night I saw it all and yet You ask Where is the arm Misses Gwen Lewis and ancl Alice Rich visited ted several Un University i versi ty classes last Tuesday morning Both are former students of of President Talmage and seemed much pleased to see his familiar face again Say Smith your head is loose your wheels ra rattle and you need a blowing up This no doubt sounds queer to r readers aders who do not know that it is only the opinion of a certain person concerning concerning concerning concern concern- ing Smiths Smith's new wheel Say Judge wheres where's the you formerly were wont to carry about presumably presumably presumably pre pre- for the purpose of slashing inoffensive inoffensive in inoffensive in- in offensive Colton on the hands We did have great hopes of your becoming an expert with the weapon but it seems we weare weare weare are doomed to tobe to be disappointed Did all de coons become afraid of you or did you simply tire of attending walks cake-walks If you intend to go to the Delta Phi J ball get your tickets immediately as they are nearly all aJI taken Remember that this will be the last Delta Phi Party this year Why not have the majority in attendance University students Professor to student Do you remember remember remember re re- member the names of the generals who figured in this battle Student t The name of one begins with C and the others other's name begins with some other letter i Professor Quite correct One of our Chemistry students bids bid fair to become a promising factor in inthe inthe inthe the patent medicine world He recently compounded a cough medicine and administered administered administered ad ad- ministered three teaspoonfuls to a suffering suffering suffering suffer suffer- ing student fellow-student who immediately became became became be be- came rid of his cough but had to be pounded on the back to restore him to his normal state Dont slam the door is an admonition admonition admonition tion we fear you will never again hear upon leaving the CHRONICLE office The janitor came in one day and very calmly took the door from its hinges and carried it away leaving us open to the gaze of the admiring public Who'll show their loyalty by contributing a pair of curtains to make amends for the absence of the door Dont Don't be bashful in offering your services Saturday the the geology classes took an excursion to the north of the city in in search of fossils Van Cott captured the prize specimen Mr W. W N. N Petterson made a a sub carboniferous leaf print with Georges George's hatchet The ladies proved themselves to be able climbers in practical study of geology while Miss Parsons kept the accompanying accompanying accompanying instructor close by her th through rough the adhesive force of molasses candy Sheets worked an hour trying to undermine undermine undermine under under- mine a ledge with borrowed pick All felt paid for the tri trip trip- p and we doubt not did their parts at supper time Again Again Thursday night the lecture room was crowded long before time to begin Dr Talmage began his lecture by telling telling telling tell tell- ing of the human bones and illustrating by the use of an articulated skeleton The amount of matter told and illustrated illus- illus f J in the short time was wonderful The use of the stereopticon and a manikin manikin manikin man man- ikin showing the natural form size an and position of the organs made the lecture very interesting Professor Matthews lectures next Thursday subject Philosophy Philosophy Philosophy Phil of Theism The play this week at the Grand is Young Mrs Winthrop It was one ope of the Madison Square Theatre Company's great successes and had a phenomenal run in New York It will be presented by the stock company at the Grand exactly exactly exactly ex ex- as first produced in New York The play for next week will probably be II Our Boys followed by Pink Dominoes Dominoes Dominoes Dom Dom- inoes the the Galley Slave and Betsy Young Mrs Winthrop requires a great deal of special scenery but the management of the Grand is sparing no expense to make it a perfect production in every evelY detail Monday evening March 18 the Delta Phi held a public meeting in the Art Gallery The room was comfortably filled The question for th the debate was Resolved that the President nt of the United States States- should not be elected by popular vote R. R V. V Smith and H. H L. L Nelson for the affirmative won won the debate The ne negative was championed by E. E C. C Robinson and 1 J. E. E Willey The second number on the program was a well well rendered rendered vocal duet by Misses and Cooper Miss Lynn then gave a piano selection which was very very much much Shady Stringer recited and after a vocal selection by Miss Royle whose pleasing voice won voice won her a hearty encore the meeting adjourned On the whole the program was a very satisfactory one one- It would grieve us very much if we knew that there is any person in the University who would steal a hat and yet it seems very strange that students now and then miss their hats and fail to find them again We have in mind one young gentleman who now mourns the loss of three hats since he entered the University We do not say that these hats hats hats' have been stolen but we think that things cel certainly point in that tha t tion Last winter we heard many complaints complaints complaints com com- plaints from t the e students of rubbers being being being be be- ing lost If it is true that such work is going on the persons guilty should be caught and summarily dealt with |