OCR Text |
Show N. NITTS ON SHIPPING. QESCIUS NITTS, sage of Punkindorf Station, Just shifted his quid, in his slow mastication, To deluge a beetle in swift ambulation, And then he spoke up, after long meditation, Concerning the plans to increase navigation. "I see in the papers, how much they are filled With the Shippin' Boards plans on the ships they will build To send up our total of tonnage a-scootin', And baffle them submarine wiles of the Teuton; Which plans surely merit the congratulation Of folks of this country, and Punkindork Station. "There's somethin' in 'most ev'ry paper, I see, And I reads it with care, till I gets the idee, And it busts on my brain, like the sun in a chasm, And fills me plumb brimmin' with enthusiasm To think how them U-boats destructive campaign The Shippin' Board throttles as I will explain. "It 'pears like the Board has took steps to commence To start to work out, with profound common sense, A programme, involvin a plan to begin To consider on startin' in order to win Tentative inception of steps to start out To launch the beginnin' of what they're about. "All this, so I reads, involves they should outline Initial beginnin's to start to design To aim to prepare to get set to get ready To steer boldly out on their course, strong and steady, That leads to the outline the3r wants to commence To start to work out, with profound common sense. . "I bet that news ain't no great appetizer ' To Admiral Tirpitz, or Wilhelm, the Kaiser ! I reads of it all in the papers, and, say It jest makes me want to yell, 'Hip, Hip, Hooray!' To think what that Shippin' Board's cool-headed gents Has planned to take steps to start in to commence." Dean Collins, in The Spectator. ANOTHER HOLDUP. HE Railroad Brotherhoods want another increase in wages only forty per cent advance this time ; but they have been good enough to give their employers until the end of the month to come to a decision. That was very thoughtful, indeed, considering how some fifteen months ago, when these same brotherhoods set out to sandbag the government, they allowed Congress only forty-eight hours to accede ac-cede to their demands. But that was before the war. The country is now facing the gravest crisis in its history and labor has repeatedly and vociferously pledged its loyalty to the government. And so the brotherhoods are taking this way of proving their patriotism. They must have another substantial increase in wages, of course, irres- pective of whether they deserve it or the companies can afford to assume as-sume the additional burden but they are quite willing that the railroad rail-road managements shall take thirty days to think the proposition over. The railroads ought to be thankful for this consideration, we suppose, sup-pose, as we should all be thankful for small favors in such troublesome times. But what most concerns us now, as it must concern the railroads rail-roads themselves, is how they are going to be able to meet this exorbitant ex-orbitant demand at the end of thirty days, or thirty years for that matter, unless some good angel comes to their rescue. The transportation trans-portation situation is most precarious at the present moment and it is growing more so all the time. The railroads were in bad shape before the war ; they are in worse shape now. Their carrying capacity is being be-ing taxed to the limit ; expenses are piling up on every hand ; net revenues rev-enues will not permit of the necessary repairs to rolling stock and trackage ; new capital is not obtainable ; and several of the great systems sys-tems are heading straight towards rack and ruin unless something is done to relieve the situation. In the faceof these conditions the demand of the trainmen is preposterous. pre-posterous. Surely they must know that it is impossible to further encumber en-cumber the payrolls at this time. Perhaps it is their purpose to force the railroads into the hands of the government. If they intend going into politics, as it would appear from the action of organized labor at Buffalo, the move for government control of the transportation lines might be in line with the scheme now on foot to gain control of the balance of power in the nation. But even so, our belief is that they are doomed to disappointment. That is, if their chief desire is to boost the payroll. Suppose the government is forced to take control of the railroads and operate them as a war measure: is it reasonable to assume that it could consistently and safely continue to pay the average trainmen from three to four times the wages of the common soldier? The probabilities are that if the government takes a hand, there will be a general shake-up all along the line and that the trainmen's wage scale will go down instead of up. In view of the high cost of living, it is altogether al-together likely that the brotherhoods are obliged to do some fancy figuring fig-uring to make both ends meet, but at that they are not having as tough a time fighting the wolf from the door as the great mass of the laboring classes. In comparison with the other trades and occupations, occupa-tions, they are to be classed among the favored few. What about the poor devil at the bottom of the ladder who is desperately scratching to keep body and soul together? If anybody's wages are to be increased, in-creased, is it not about time that he be given a lift? And inasmuch as the people ultimately foot the bill, they ought to be given a say in the matter. If the brotherhoods persist in pressing their case, why not make their demands a matter of referendum to the people? A TIMELY OBJECT LESSON. IT is good to learn that the patriotic grafters who recently staged an army and navy bazaar in New York City, at which the gross receipts amounted to $71,475, but which netted only $754.96 for the purchase of comforts for the soldiers and sailors after all "expenses" were paid, have been indicted. For the good of the cause in every community where generous hearts are busily engaged in relief work, it is to be hoped that the profiteering promoters of this fiasco will be given the full penalty of the law. When this is done, the sequel to this unhappy incident should be accorded the widest possible publicity. This would go far towards counteracting the evil effect of the first story, which unfortunately did much to dampen the splendid enthusiasm in war relief work. Germany may have plenty of ammunition to protect the Kiel canal, but what she requires is ammunition for the alimentary canal. Shells are destructive, but they are not digestible. Medford Sun. Press reports mention a Dutch scientist who has constructed vacuum walls to make his quarters absolutely quiet. Nothing wonderful wonder-ful about that! Several local merchants obtain the same results by simply failing to advertise. Oregon City Courier. |