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Show H In An Observation Plane H TNTO my office walked a rather Rub- U - slan sort of a creature the other HL f day. I never have been an admirer of H. whiskers and I found his especially . nerve wracking and provoking. He had a habit of twisting his mouth so ( that some thousands of his whiskers U i assumed a brush-like appearance to- j ward the northeast. Close inspection H disclosed that he was grinning. M "I am a Bolshevist," he said as he H seated himself in a remote chair. j J "Take off your overcoat and make flj yourself at home," I said. H "Thank you for your courtesy to a K Bolshexist," he said dubiously. H f "Not at all," I replied, "I merely H wanted to make sure whether you had i one or two bombs and just how far they had progressed toward action." "I did not bring any bombs with B If me, but it was a struggle to leave H them at home after I read your last B issue," he replied as he seated himself H . rather crossly in a remote chair. Hj "To what am I indebted for the Hj honor of this vlBit?" I asked bitterly Hj i when I saw that he was unencumbered H with any of the tools of his trade. Hj . "I came to warn you that you had H better get in line," he said. "Bolshe- H I vism has arrived. You had better H trim your sails to please the new class H which is to rule the world. All the H Bourgeoisie will have to get in line or H starve." H , "Or be murdered," I suggested. H "As you will," he replied. "Usually, H i however, we do not permit the Bourg- H f eoisle to have their choice. The work H ing class in Russia decides for itself K whether it Bhall adopt murder, starva H tion or some other method for those H who defy It." H "I see that both murder and starva B tion are popular with the Bolshevists M in Russia," I remarked by way of lead fl ing him on. "You seem to have made m Russia much more uncomfortable than B when the czar ruled." J "Yes, we are trying to make it as H uncomfortable as possible for all but B the working class and their friends." H , "And your object?" M "Tlio dictatorship of the proletariat B must be established and then wd in- M tend to rip up and tear dovn every H I thing that the aristocracy and bourg- H eolsie estahlished," H "You seem to have been quite sue H cedsful thusMar. And you are plan H ning'the same for nil the world?" B "Of course. We must tear down to H build' up." H "And -what will you build up after H'' you have wrecked everything " "The working men will run everything." every-thing." "But will there be anything left to run?" "I am sure I don't know. We figure that things have been so bad in Russia Rus-sia that they can't be worse, no matter what happens." "But we have been fairly well contented con-tented over here. Why try Bolshevism on us?" "Because if we don't we cannot hope preserve Bolshevism in Russia." "Which is about the same as saying that you can't keep the influenza going go-ing unless you spread the germs. But don't you think that people in this country will be as hostile to your program pro-gram of destruction as they are to influenza, in-fluenza, to filth, starvation and murder?" mur-der?" "Very likely. The American people must be educated. They are behind the times. They don't seem to want any of those things that we want in Russia." "And what has 'Russian to offer? What have you accomplished?" "We have set up the dictatorship of the proletariat." "Also war, murder and starvation." I appended. I noticed that my visitor's whiskers turned into a brush in one sector and bristled alarmingly. He was not grinning grin-ning this time. He was scowling." "That is only a preliminary," he replied. re-plied. "After we have made good our control of affairs hie working class is going to make humanity happy." "How?" "By industrial equality; by giving everybody the same treatment." "Will you abolish disease, vice, cruelty, selfishness." "Those things are all due to the present system." "You seem to have them all in Russia Rus-sia in fact you seem to have a surplus." sur-plus." Again the whiskers bristled to the northeast menacingly, but the Bolshevist Bolshe-vist calmed himself. "All these things will disappear when we have established our system. "And will virtue, beauty, art and family life survive? "Virtue? Bah. There isn't anything to it. Mere middle class morality. Of course we shall break up the family and the children will belong to the state. Beauty and art will be dictated by the proletariat." "Some dictatorship," I said, scornfully. "The Soviets, will rulq hero as in Russia," he hissed between his, whiskers. whisk-ers. f Ho -vas growing excited. I decided de-cided to try another tack. "Who are the Soviets?" I inquired mildly. "Who? Who?" he said burblingly, as he .squirmed in his chair. "That shows the bourgeoisie intelligence. They want to pose as the wisest of mankind and they don't know who' is I mean what is a soviet' "You don't mean to tell me a soviet is a what," I said. "And what is this particular what?" "It's a committee for local government," govern-ment," he replied. "Republican or democratic?" "Nothing of that complexion; not at all." "Perhaps rather of a red complexion," com-plexion," I opined. "Yes. The red flag is the flag of the future. The Stars and Stripes will be succeeded by the red flag of radicalism, radical-ism, of Lenine, Trotzky and Karl Marx' "Karl marks what?" I inquired. "Marks nothing, you simpleton." I think he was yelling by this time. "I am sure you said tha&Karl marked something. Of course, it makes no difference to me what the markings were only you brought up the matter yourself and now you are getting angry." "Why shouldn't I get angry at such nonsense. I thought you were an intelligent in-telligent man." "Well, we won't quarrel about trifles. trif-les. You were saying that the red flag would rule." "Yes. The red flag will rule. We shall have Soviets and they will be directed di-rected by the people's commissioner." "Scheid or Neslen?" I asked. "What are you talking about?" he exploded. "I don't know," I said apologetically. "What are you talking about?" "I am wasting my time," said my visitor ruefully. "I came to argue the cause of the people and " "What people Russ, Finn, Laplander Laplan-der or Hun?" "The proletariat." "Any kin of the Russians?" "No! No! The proletariat is the people all the people everywhere." I refuse to join the clan," I responded. re-sponded. "About the time I had ranged myself alongside the people's commissioner, commis-sioner, the man who shot the czar and the man who blacked Lenine's boots some other "proletariats" would come along and accuse Us of being aristocrats aristo-crats engineering a counter-revolution. I'll wait until the 'proletariat' has been reduced to its lowest term, if that, be ppssible. Then I may join." "Then you'll be dead, you blockhead," block-head," shouted my Bolshevist. "That's the pleasantest thing you have suggested since you came In here," I rejoined. "How did you come to think of anything so easy and cheerful cheer-ful for a poor mortal." "At all events, I am much obliged for your warning," I added as he came to has feet with some asperity. "And you had better heed it, too," he said. "Get on the side of the proletariat." "But if everybody gets -on that side, there will be only one side and then thero will be too much competition for Lenine and Trotzky. Germany cannot afford to pay everybody in the world to be Bolshevists." ., "I see you are uuconvinded," ho said. "But we propose to make all these smart critics of Bolshevism starve for a while. Then perhaps they'll he good Bolshevists. We'll make 'em work hard, too." "Like Lenine and Trotzky?" I suppose. "You had better get in line," said friend Bolshevist as he gloomed through the doorway. "The general strike will be spreading all over the country soon." "That certainly will be hard work,"? I replied. |
