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Show THE CALL OF THE COURTS. SCENE: Sagamore Hill. Personages: Colonel Roosevelt and several more people. Time: three days after the Home Coming. Colonel (to butler) What have we for dinner din-ner today? (Lays down his copy of Machiavelli's "The Prince.") Butler We have Potage a la Reine, KIngfish, Kaiser Schnitzel, Royal snuab, v; , Colonel Ah! it is well. Butler Yes. Colonel. Colonel (angrily) I have told you that when no one is about, I wish you to address me as "sire." Butler Yes, sire. (Starts to leave.) Colonel Hey! How dare you turn your back on me? Didn't I teach you how to leave our presence? pres-ence? Butler I beg your pardon, Colonel I mean sire I won't forget again. I was afraid I might bump into the china closet. Yes, sir er, sire I'll remember. (Bows himself out backward.) Colonel (grumbling) Donnerwetter! There's no savior faire at all among these varlets. Det ar inte bra. (Calls through open window.) What ho, attention there! Why don't you salute when you pass our august window? Voice (from outside) It's only James, Your Honor. Colonel Blockhead! Aren't you one of the palace sentry? Voice No. Your Grace. I'm the gardener. Colonel Well, what in thunder are you doing do-ing in that carabinleri uniform? I bought it for the guard at the gate. Voice The missus gave it to me. I Colonel Shut up! Vendetta! Voice Yes, Your Reverence. Colonel (bangs window closed, and sits down at writing desk. Picks up manuscript; steps onto on-to veranda and reads aloud, "My faithful subjects sub-jects Butler Beg pardon, sire. You wanted me to telephone for theatre tickets. Where do you wish " Colonel The Empire Theatre, of course. Is (Continued on' Pago 14.) H (Continued from Page 9.) HJ "The Dictator" playing now? What's that con- H' founded noise in the stable? H Butler They're practising the long drum roll K you wished, sire, every time you go in and out H of the house. Hf Colonel Who is "they"? m I Butler The coachman, the chauffeur, ihe tin- H der-gardener, the laundress and thp groom, sire. V Colonel The groom? You mean the Master of Horse, don't you? Tell them I'll review the lot r Hl of them on the front lawn at flvo 't Butler As you wish, sire. HV Colonel-Dinner will be at six-thirty., I expect Htfi Her Majesty to wear her Duchess gown, and my M daughter her Princess robe. We are to have H Marquis Jayk Riis and Field-Marshall Seth Bul- m lock as guests. m Butler Yes, sire (Makes a zigzag backward H m (Enter Jayk Riis, attired in the business H clothes of a marquis.) m Jayk (bends his knee, makes a profound genu- M flection, and unrolls a long parchment) Know M ye, to whom these presents come as M Colonel Hooray! More presents? Bully! M Fine! Really, this is great! M Jayk (confused) Merely a figure of speech, M Your Royal Highness. The King's English, you H know. H Colonel (mollified) Ah, the King's English. It 1 Is well. That was 'a fine thought, Jayk. I will m present you with the Grand Duchy of Quogue, m just for that. Am I not truly a king? M Jayk (bowing double) You are indeed the H King of Clubs. M Colonel (roars) We'll drink to that in a quart M of Pommery sec. (A royal flush o'erspreads the M Colonel's features. He grins expansively, show- ; Ing plainly the crown on one of his rear teeth.) H Town Topics. The summer shows are struggling along with their heads just above water, the resorts about town are a little more featureless, if that is possible, pos-sible, than they have been in the past, the train service to all of them is about the limit, and altogether al-together if it were not for the motors, the clubs, the canyons and the races, mid-summer would be upon us in ennuied placidity. The new motordome at Wandamere opens tonight, to-night, and from the tryouts given the track by a half dozen automobilists and motor cycle riders during the week, the institution will undoubtedly become a popular attraction. The feature of to-race to-race for seven horse-power motor cycles for a |