Show I Kathleen Norris Says The The Woman Who Wont Won't Forgive Bell Ben Syndicate Features II Jill 1 T The rhe he just goodness goodness just old fashioned goodness that goodness that is J patient with a sometimes some Jome times disappointing husband with exacting children is J what America so JO des des' needs now By KATHLEEN NORRIS ARGERY CURRY M MARGERY writes me from Plainfield New J Jersey Jersey Jer Jer- ersey er- er sey that she wishes she could forgive a person who once has injured her She says she is so made that she cannot and that her married life is being destroyed in consequence This is the purest nonsense To assume that you cannot cannot can injustice injustice injustice in- in in in- not forgive an injury or in this life is to justice proclaim proclaim proclaim pro pro- claim yourself a person of limited intelligence incapable incapable incapable able of growth Margery's story is that her husband husband husband hus hus- band was deceiving her about money money money mon mon- ey for many years For 14 years Bob sent 50 a month to an old woman woman woman wom wom- an who worked for his bis mother as housekeeper seamstress nurse When the old woman died Bobs Bob's office office of of- fice flee secretary commented to Margery Margery Margery Mar Mar- gery upon Bobs Bob's generosity and Margery hasn't forgiven Bob yet She keeps a cool civility going before before before be be- fore the children but she has moved out of the room she and Bob have shared for 15 years and as Bob says that unless this sort of foolishness foolishness foolishness foolish foolish- ness stops hell he'll get out for good matters have reached a serious point and Margery in hi floods of tears has written for my advice Trust Is Gone To think that while I was saving saving saving sav sav- ing and economizing and doing without things she writes Bob Boball Boball Boball all the time was supporting an old woman who had bad no claim on hImat him himat himat at all and never saying a word to tome tome tome me of that extra a year He has been a good husband and we have prospered I thought myself a few months ago the happiest woman in the world But now I feel that I never can trust Bob again and nd what is love without trust Unfortunately Im I'm so made that I cant can't forgive Ill I'll bear anything anything anything any any- I thing while people treat me fairly But once Im I'm angered good angered good night What a strange thing is the smugness smugness smug smug- ness of these wives who boast of their moral and mental limitations who gloat over the Jealousy or extravagance extravagance ex ex- or hot temper or the hardness of heart that cant forgive forgive for for- give gIvel This is a form of childishness childishness childishness child child- that makes it hard for meto me meto meto to answer Margery C Curry rry patiently But I can tell can tell you one thing Margery Margery Margery Mar Mar- gery that unless we keep changing growing Improving we humans settle into fixed forms and a part of ot us dies When you say that you are made that way and that its it's a characteristic of your family never never never nev nev- er to change or never to learn to forgive or never to gain control of the hot temper of which you are all so secretly proud or never to develop character enough to live within your income and pay your bills honestly you honestly you are announcing that you are among the folk who are Incapable of becoming civilized Real women do forgive Real women are ashamed of any such boast as that their tempers are uncontrollable uncontrollable un Wl- un- un controllable or their Jealousy too rooted deep to be cured Real women women women wom wom- en grow up Civilization In Peril PerU A good many thinking persons now are anxious about this tired old worn war-worn world and with good 1 We learn to forgive ACT MATURELY Mrs Curry cant can't t f forgive her husband for deceiving her The deception was this Bob who is a successful and dutiful dutiful ful husband has been sending sending sending send send- ing a 50 a month to an olda old I woman who was his hits mothers mother's nurse He lIe has been keeping I this donation a secret for 14 years What makes Margery so mad is to think that while she was skimping and saving Bob was teas passing out this dole to a woman who had no real claim to it But worst of all the fact that she size was kept in the dark on an important family matter matter matter mat mat- ter for so long has shattered her faith in her husband The Theold Theold Theold old bond of faith seems to be ripped apart and Margery cannot bring herself to face the situation In all other ways Bob has been nearly per per- f The sudden discovery o of f this secret has ended Margery's Marg Marg- crys cry's happiness Miss Norris replies that we must all forgive and forget In Inthis Inthis Inthis this case it should not be so hard seeing that Bob was ivas acting acting acting act act- ing from what he considered the highest motives motives gratitude gratitude to his mothers mother's nurse That he lie could not afford this generosity generosity generosity gener gener- is another matter The Thereal Thereal Thereal real issue is whether Margery can act like a mature woman and overlook a matter that after all is not very serious reason Unless we women learn to forgive and arid forgive and forgive things will grow worse Unless we learn to deal honestly with our lives there is no hope for us Unless Unless Unless Un Un- less we face our problems problems each each woman her own own and acknowledge them and study them and master them with the good of our men and our children our community and our God in hi mind civilization will suffer a setback from which it wont won't easily recover It is no longer a question of an individual woman saying that she cant can't do this and cant can't do that The demand Is for actual heroism the heroism the heroism that sweeps aside slights and injustices with the magnificence magnificence cence of a strong character The courage that endures dull days monotonous duties tiring responsibilities because It is out of that quiet fidelity that a great nation is built The goodness just goodness Just sheer old fash goodness that is patient with witha a sometimes disappointing husband with exacting children Is what America so desperately needs now What she needs now as she needed needed need need- ed servicemen a few years ago 1 Is an an army anny of wives and mothers each one capable of solving her own problem and willing and eager to solve it it and by so much lifting the staggering load of the nations nation's eUes and burdens If U instead of these courageous women she gets the Margery Curry sort the whining whinIng Ing crowd that cant forgive can cant can't live ve honestly cant can't stand marital disappointments cant can't put up with the ever every y day difficulties and disappointments of life lile we are In a bad way indeed |