OCR Text |
Show Strays. When a man has water on tho brain, It really doesn't matter whether It is boiled or not. Ono never hears of a clam being criticized for talking too much. It Is not ulono tho unmarried that are disappointed In lovo. When ,a man Is working on a good salary, ho takes at least an hour for lunch. When ho is In tho business for himself, ten minutes Is too long. Five million dollnrs for heroes! Just my luck. Nobody ever falls Into tho water when I am around. Tom MuBson, discussing tho modern mod-ern novel, nsk8: "Why did tho organ peal?" liecauao It could not shuck, Tom, old boy. A girl' may havo falso hair and falso teeth and still be ablo to find a man's heart with n flnu applo-dumpllug. 1 On account of tho lato spring and tho absenco of hammock sparking, Christmas weddings aro expected to fall off materially this year. ; A friend of initio feathered his nest by marrying a rich milliner. I It used to bo tho time, tho placo ' and tho girl, but on account of this chilly, fussy old spring, it has been tho tlino, the flrcsldo and tho girl for j two months past. (Dated Juno 1). A rowboat Is a mighty poor thing In which to mako lovo. This lato spring is stopping a lot of talk about pcok-a-boo waists, any- I how. My Inst Chrlstmns neckties aro Just uliout worn out. How aro you getting along with yours? I A Clnclntmtl girl worth $500,000, nmrrlud a man who thought alio was poor. It must ho great to marry a girl Ilka that nnd wako up to give the wolf at tho door tho merry ha ha. Nobody hasn't sent us n snako Htorlcs In months. It sometimes takes a lot of slick maneuvering to get that cigar out of your friend's pocket without stealing It or asking for a amoko point-blank. |