OCR Text |
Show 1 JARLEY. Jarley possessed the domestic virtues to tho egotistical degree. He wearied his friends with his self laudations, bored thein by cataloguing the delights of a home life aud angered them by parading the fact that he was a genuine "stay at homer. " Even his wife took him to task at times because of his obstinacy ob-stinacy in living up to his high keyed pretensions, for he vowed that when he put ou his slippers and smoking jacket no earthly power could make him leave the house. It was a great event in her monotonous life when he deigned to make a call, and her nervous system was thrown from its balance for a moment mo-ment when he took her to the theater. He seldom varied his programme. He sat down to dinner at 6:30 o'clock and then brought out his rusty red slippers, donned his well worn smoking jacket and read the papers until bedtime. Each year of his married life seemed to fasten the habit to him more firmly, and the tenth anniversary of his wedding day found him a slave to his home conceit. In all other respects Jarley was a fine fellow, popular with his business friends, extremely affectionate and kind to his wife and children and a good citizen. Many times his down town acquaint ances had urged him to join this and that lodge, council or chapter of some secret society, but he checked further solicitation by ostentatiously announcing announc-ing that he had no use for clubs or societies; so-cieties; that he had a little club of his own at home which took up all his sparo time, and that his family and domestic do-mestic comforts wero all ho needed in tho way of life aud amusement. Ho vs riding down town in a car one morning when a friend iu the life insurance in-surance way began talking business to him. With that enthusiasm and earnestness earnest-ness which aro characteristic of a successful suc-cessful life insurance agent he secured Jarley's interested attention, and after giving him a pocketful of circulars, estimates es-timates aud other advertising literature left him at tho corner, satisfied that ho would have Jarley's policy before tho month was out. At lunch Jarley confided con-fided to his offico companion that ho had half a mind to take out a policy in tho Double Cross Lifo Insurance company. com-pany. "What's that?" asked his friend. "Yoa want somo life insurance? How much do you want, $3,000? Why-don' t you come into tho Triple Plated League of Good Fellows? It's a mutual relief and aid association and carries a lifo insurance in-surance of 3,000, and it will not cost you one-third as much as is charged by the cheapest lifo insuranco company in existence. Just think, only 87 cents for each assessment, and last year there were but 30 assessments. Beat that if you can. Over 500,000 members in the United States." "No, " said Jarley, "I don't want to join a society. I am so much of a stay at homo that I do not feel that" "You won't have to go to lodge meetings, meet-ings, " interrupted his friend. "All you will have to do is to fill out this application. appli-cation. I will see that you go through the committee all right Then you will have to bo initiated, and after that, so long as you pay your assessments and dues, you needn't go near the lodge-rooms. lodge-rooms. Then when you die the boys will see that you aro buried in good shape, and your widow will get $3, 000. " Jarley thought of the Triple Plate league all of that afternoon. At night ho looked over tho life insurance estimates, esti-mates, compared them with the estimates esti-mates given to him by his business friend and next morning told the latter that he would fill out an application. His friend was as good as his word. Jarley went through the examination committee without a jar, and one morning morn-ing he received a polite letter telling him that his application had been duly received, and that if he would present himself on the following Tuesday he would be initiated. Mrs. Jarley was greatly surprised when her husband hurried hur-ried through his dinner that Tuesday evening and without telling her where he was going put on his best clothes and left the house. Jarley met his friend in the corner drug store under the lodgeroom of the Triple Platers with some misgivings. He was densely ignorant of the first principles of a secret society, and his knowledge of initiations was limited to reading "riding the goat" jokes and accounts ac-counts of college hazings. In the drug store ho wa3 introduced to other Triple Platers and was warmly welcomed. Under Un-der tho benign influence of friendly, jovial jo-vial good fellowship his nervousness wore off, and he ascended the stairs to enter upon the ordeal with considerable nonchalanca To his surprise he found that the in-itatioa in-itatioa ceremonies were dignified and solemn. A great deal was said of philanthropy, phi-lanthropy, friendship aud loyalty, aud he felt as though he wero being received into church. Thou he was given the passwords and grip and soon after was tho center of a crowd of men, receiving congratulations and slaps on the back. He passed a delightful evening. Music, cigars and well told stories followed one another rapidly, and it was after midnight mid-night when he reached his home and his worried wife. A few days later he placed in his buttonhole the figured button of the Triple Platers and practiced prac-ticed the grip with his friend until he had it perfect. Jariey for the second time in his married lifo broke his stay at home rule by going to tho lodge the next Tuesday evening, and tho week after found him there again. Tho pleasant evenings with the Triplo Platers and the novelty of it all turned his attention to the dull lifo 'ed by his wife, aud he took her to the theater. Soon after tho Triplo Platers held an open lodge for tho wives aud friends of tho members. Jarley bought Mrs. Jarley Jar-ley a dress for the occasion, and the breath nearly left the good woman when she found that ho had ordered a carriage. Tho friend who had induced him to join the society had not painted its benefits ben-efits too gaudily, for a member of Jarley's Jar-ley's lodge died, aud Jarley was appointed ap-pointed one of the pallbearers and was one of tho committee to take a check for $3,000 to tho widow. The assessments assess-ments were not numerous, and Jarley figured that ho was carrying a life insurance in-surance of $3,000 for about $15 a thousand. thou-sand. Ho also wore his Triplo Plate button, and one week when he was sent out of the city on business he attended a lodge meeting in the couutry town aud made some valuable business acquaintances. ac-quaintances. Jarley had been a Triple Plater for gix months, when he was approached bra mamber of bis phurchwitn acropo- sirion to join tne 15. ot t. x. A., a secret se-cret mutual accident and sick benefit association. "You say that you are a Triple Plater, Plat-er, " said the church member. "Your lodge meets Tuesday evenings. That's all right. Ours meets Thursdays. The Triple Platers have no accident and sick benefits. Twenty-five dollars a week if you are sick or hurt and the doctor paid by the B. of Q. T. X. You had better come in. It won't cost 'over $25 a year. " In his methodical, businesslike way Jarley figured it out, and a few weeks later he was initiated into the B. of Q. T. X. He placed the gold button of the B. of Q. T. X. on the lapel of his vest and felt that his family was well provided pro-vided for Feeling that he ought to encourage that which was of so much benefit to himself, he brought in numerous members mem-bers to both associations and subscribed for the organs of both orders. He was looked upon as a valuable man by both societies and in a short time was elected outer guard of the Triple Platers and inner guard of the B. of Q. T. X. Soon after his election he was invited to join an order which was composed entirely of men in his line of business, the Benevolent and Supreme Order of the Princes of the Seven Sleepers. This met on Saturday night, and the same entnusiasm wnicn ne naa aispiay-ed aispiay-ed in keeping up his self acquired reputation repu-tation as a great home body led him to assumo a leading part in the Seven Sleepers. He was elected secretary of the association and soon after was elected elect-ed warder in the Triple Platers and high counselor in the B. of Q. T. X. Threi evenings a week were taken up by the three societies, aud his front parlor became be-came a committee room. Mrs. Jarley rather liked the change. Tho Triple Platers. B. of Q. T. X.'s and Seven Sleepers were pleasant men, and her homo life had a variety and liveliness which contrasted most pleasantly with the ten years of monotony. Jarley was now a full fledged secret society man. He joined the American Order of the Kickapoos, the High and Mighty Knights of the Supreme Council Coun-cil of the Eclipse, the Brethren of the Order of the Lost Pleiades, the Sons of Neptune and the Baronial Order of the Ancients. Ho was elected to office in each one of the associations, and when ho was not at lodgo meetings he was poring over books and accounts, addressing address-ing postal cards, attending committee meetings, making out programmes for open meetings, examining applications and practicing grips. Ho attended two lodges on ono evening even-ing sometimes, and his multitudinous responsibilities, his numerous memberships member-ships and his lodge acquaintances brought about a confusion of grips, passwords pass-words and rituals which caused him to introduce Triple Plate procedures in the lodgo of the Seven Sleepers and give the Kickapoo grip to the worshipful grand master of the Sons of Neptune when he was up for the ninety-ninth degree. Mrs. Jarley never saw him except ex-cept for breakfast and a hasty dinner. Jarley was so much occupied with his cumulative duties that he had no time to take her to open lodges, but he quieted quiet-ed his conscience by telling her that if he was brought homo with a broken leg he would receive $200 a week as accident acci-dent benefits, if he wero taken with typhoid ty-phoid fever his sick benefits would pay him $100 a week, and when he died she would receive $20,000. Every other day assessment notices came from one or the other of his societies, so-cieties, and he gave up smoking, walked to and from his office and bought but two suits of clothes a year to save the money with which to meet his assessments. assess-ments. Tho drain grew too heavy at length, and he took a cheaper house and cut the servant girl's wages. He sometimes some-times wished that he would break his leg in order to get back some of the money he had put into accident benefits. His coat and vest were spangled with secret society badges, crosses and buttons, but-tons, and he wore three society watch charms on his chain. Tho walls of his sitting room and parlor were almost covered with sheepskin sheep-skin certificates of membership and photographs pho-tographs of Jarley as worshipful grand master, inner guard, outer guard, high potentate, sublime protector and as a score of other officers in the various lodges. He developed into an enthusiastic, aggressive, ag-gressive, energetic, busy secret society man, and when he was introduced to a stranger he would press the stranger's hands, intertwine his fingers and work his palm a quarter of an hour, giving him the various grips of all the secret societies of which ho was a member. Chicago Record. Mrs. N. M. Richardson ts a practicing practic-ing attorney in Lincoln, Neb. Beecher generally spoke in a conversational conver-sational tone, with no great effort at what is commonly denominated oratory. When he rose to a climax, however, his voice was equal to any emergency, but even his loudest tones seemed to cause him little effort. Tho hoopskirt was in full feather in 1596. It was then made of iron and sometimes weighed as much as 30 pounds. . In 1861 the French government ordered or-dered several lighthouses to be lighted by the electric light. |