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Show Diamonds aren't forever Ammon Van Orden E - CENTER THEATER 'OREM THROUGH FEBRUARY 4 fif801.226.BG00 2 2 5 WEST <1OO NORTH • wwwJ-lALETUEATERCOM When a young maiden gets engaged the first thing that her mom and girl friends ask is "Can I see the ring?" Then for the next several minutes they ooh and ahh over how big the new rock is. Who can blame them? We all know thai the prettier the diamond and fancier the ring- the more the groom loves his future bride to be. Have you ever noticed that 90% of all wedding invitations include the bride flashing her new bling bling in a not so conspicuous way? If you compare rings the mans ring is generally a simple gold band, while the woman's rings whole objective is to draw attention to itself. Why does the wife deserve such an extravagant expense, particularly at the beginning of marriage when the funds are at there weakest? I can only think of a few answers: 1. "I'm a girl and I deserve beautiful things- while you are a boy and are fine with not showing off." 2. Tradition- hey, they have been doing this for hundreds of years it must be right. I'm pretty sure the south used that same excuse when they were asked to abolish slavery. 3. The girl is sacrificing her last name, so the least you could do is buy her off with a big shiny stone. It worked for Kobe Bryant when he was caught sleeping around. If I was a girl, I would think that having a fiance that cared more about our financial future than the carat size of my ring would be an important trait to have in a mate. But then again based on my dating experience I'm not sure that girls think much at all. There are several girls out there who are saying right now, "It won't matter if my husband spends a fortune on my ring because he is going to be rich!" You know who you are, just admit it. You have been given everything you ever wanted in life from daddy-poo and you expect this trend to keep going. I have a news flash honey- money doesn't grow on trees! Either your husband will spend the majority of your time together slaving away at the office, trying to provide for your petty needs, or he will already have inherited a fortune in the which he will not be a man of character. Therefore your children will turn out just like you, Paris Hilton Wannabe, spoiled and useless to society. Chances are that your parents struggled mightly with finances when they were first married and your mother didn't get the engagement ring that you have always dreamed of in the jewelry shop window. But chances are also good that those years of sacrifice were the times that forged an unbreakable bond between your parents- one that you will never experience because you will never know what it's like to sacrifice some of your own wants for someone elses. Granted I'll never feel that bond either, but that's for different reasons. I have an incurable allergic reaction to girls. When I'm around pretty ones I go brain dead, and when I'm around ugly ones I go blind. Ladies if you want my advice, and you probably don't, get a cubic zirconium for your first ring. It looks shinier than a real diamond, it's cheaper, and it will actually last longer because of it's carbon make up. Then when you are a little bit older and have some money put away, buy the real thing instead of wasting your excess on spoiling your kids. By that time you really will deserve that diamond for putting up with the kids for so long. If and when your girl friends call you out proclaiming that your husband bought you a fake, tell them the truth. "My husband and I thought it would be a better idea to save that money for more usefull expenses like a future payment on our education, a house or even future kids instead of on my vanity." Please write me back with their response. |