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Show StatesmanSports Page 10 Perfect Partner. The Blue and the White Sports Debate Sam Bryner is a senior majoring in business management. Comments can be sent to him sam. bryner@aggiemail _ usu.edu David Baker is a senior majoring in print journalsim. Comments can be sent to him da.bake@aggiemail.usu.edu You found one partner. Now find the finest in Wedding psauareane r i n T i n B invitations & related West 200 North paper goods. 753-8875 CRESTWOODt Kmihvonri Lynw ond SSO N (oO I" son \ Crest •woods [kuh n-veen-yuh ns] Definition: Low summer Rates! (From $450) -Private bedroom; private bath -Expanded cable; Free High Speed Internet -Air conditioning; Covered Parking (Edgewood) -Washer and dryer in your apartment -Practically on Campus Synonyms: Summer, Social, Fun, Good Times Used in a sentence: With Crestwoods, your housing choice is made! See also: www.logancrestwoods.com Drivers Wanted Must be 18 with clean driving record. Have own car. Flexible hours. Perfect for student! To apply, meet with Ray, 874 So. Main, Smithfield, 563-6088. Hourly wage plus tips! Also, gas reimbursement. A Great Job! 1. NCAA Tournament champs? I have to stay true to my pathetic excuse for a bracket and take the University of North Carolina over UCLA. If you really want to know what's going to happen, just tap into some ESPN coverage and watch those lucky bastards gloat about their all-No.l-seed Final Fours and how hard it was for them to pick such an unlikely occurrence. It hadn't happened since seeding was instituted, but how hard is it to pick that bracket where there's no Cinderellas in the Final Four? I hate when anyone else is right, especially those overpaid, has-been coaches and players in Bristol. If you were such a great coach Digger Phelps or Steve Lavin, why aren't you still doing it? Huh? Analyze that for a minute. Did I already say UNC would win? Good, I got a little off track. The implications of the outcome of the Final Four are enormous for me this year. I have a chance to win my bracket league, which is good, but I also have a good chance of losing, which is bad. I won't lose any money or physical possessions, which I would actually prefer to the alternative of having a friend lay claim to bragging rights for the next year. I have one scenario that has to happen in order for me to win my bracket league. First off, to answer the question, I pick North Carolina to win it all. But for me it's not that simple. North Carolina has to beat UCLA in the finals. If they beat Memphis in the final, I lose my league to a guy whose name is A-Dog. How pathetic would that be? 2. What would you do with Chad Johnson? Trade him for $85—get it? His number is 85 and they'd get 85 bucks for him. Brilliant. Three pats on the head for me for my wit— and a goat to the producers of "Dancing With the Stars." I think Chad's moves, although they're very conducive to creating separation form defensive backs and touchdown catching, would be put to better use in the ballroom dancing arena. We've all seen him cha-cha, I think the only word that comes to mind is: Breathtaking. When someone has a talent like that, it would be wrong to not use it to better society. Chad can only dance in the NFL when he scores touchdowns, and since he's pissed off his quarterback and coaching staff, that won't be frequently, but in the world of ballroom dance, Ocho Cinco will be free to grove on a daily basis. It just makes sense. If I were Bengals coach Marvin Lewis and I had to decide what to do with start receiver Chad Johnson, my decision would be easy: absolutely nothing. Johnson has done nothing but whine and complain since the season ended. Johnson argues the team is just getting worse each season, which is true, and he doesn't want to be a part of it. Not that he has really been much a teammate anyway. Every time he does one of his idiotic and self-centered touchdown celebrations he is putting himself above the team and so I say now that Lewis does the same to "Ocho-Cinco." By keeping Johnson on the sidelines and not trading or cutting the star player, Johnson will have no way to feed his ego and he will eventually come crawling back, begging to play. 3. NFL haircut rule a good idea? If Roger Goodell was my dad, I'd probably be into hardcore drugs, slutty girls and horrifying techno music—just as a way to rebel against my puritanical upbringing. And he treats NFL players like the unwashed youth of some backwards colony of morons. Quit being such a hard ass. If someone wants to have long hair, leave them alone - these are grown, or overgrown, men. Are we worried about them looking like women? Because I've never seen a woman with a chest as big as a defensive lineman—I can always hold out hope. The players know that stuffs going to get pulled, they don't care. Goodell is just so straight-laced, so seemingly uptight, he's bound to pop. Not an ounce of rock 'n' roll. I bet his sex life is just stagnant, boring, about as adventurous—and with as much heart-pounding excitement—as a colonoscopy. Maybe that's Goodell's problem. The NFL makes players wear helmets and pads for a reason. That is to protect the safety of what the Water Boy described as "finely tuned athletic machines." The same principle applies to the long hair of NFL players. It is a serious health risk to the players who have long hair. You can only imagine the damage that could happen to a long- haired player when the opposing team dives forward and brings a guy down by his hair. The NFL is a business. Any good business will make the workplace as safe as the job will allow. By banning long hair in the NFL, not only will serious injuries be avoided, but as fans, we won't have to painfully sit through an entire game staring at some guys foot-long dreads. Hell s yes. This means more Peter Gammons. That man has a head of hair Ron Burgundy would be jealous of. When you're going bald, you learn to appreciate a full, cascading quaff of hair. If I make it to Gammons' age, my head will look like a grape that's shriveled up—not a raisin, smart ass, don't jump ahead—and began to rot in the crisper drawer in the fridge. I have never been a huge baseball guy. Maybe it's because I rarely hit the ball in little league baseball. Or, on a more serious note, it was probably because there has never been a local team to root for in Utah. But, anyway, I noticed this morning as I was watching SportsCenter that baseball season must have started because half of the show was about baseball. 4. Are you happy baseball has started? a GEICO. A15-miniitecall could save you 15% on car insurance. Monday, April 2, 2008 Hoosiers hire new coach BLOOMINGTON, Ind. (AP)' — Indiana University will hire Marquette's Tom Crean as its basketball coach and is expected to introduce him at a news conference Wednesday. University trustee Philip Eskew confirmed the hiring. Eskew said Crean had signed a letter-of-intent with the university and was meeting with his team Tuesday night. Team spokesman J.D. Campbell said a news conference had yet to be scheduled. The hiring comes near the end of a tumultuous six-week period in which ; former Hoosiers coach Kelvin • Sampson resigned amid an NCAA scandal, interim coach Dan Dakich replaced him and then lost four of seven games. Dakich also suspended guard Jamarcus Ellis for disciplinary reasons for the Hoosiers' game at Penn State, • and announced Tuesday that • Ellis and guard Armon Bassett had been kicked off the team for missing two scheduled events. Replace: Life after Carroll LI continuedfrompg. 10 rarely signing players out of high school. Wesley, Newbold and Williams stand to be the next ' three high school recruits to return to continue their impact for their sophomore seasons. Only four other players have come to USU to play for Morrill out of high school. Those players were Tony Brown, Spencer Nelson, • Nate Harris and Carroll—all of whom have career statistics littering the record books at Utah State, and all of whom rank in the top 20 in school history in career scoring. Each of the previous four high school recruits under Morrill have averaged more than 10 points per game in their sophomore seasons. On top of that, Brown, Nelson and Carroll each helped lead the Aggies to an NCAA tournament berth in their sophomore campaign, while Harris was a first team All-Conference performer on a Top-20 team in 2004 that didn't make the NCAA Tournament. Given that each of the past four high school recruits have all had the success they've had, as well as the success of past junior college recruits to make immediate impacts, much like Wilkinson did in 2008, the Aggies shouldn't surfer much drop off in production next season with the development of their returning key contributors. -matt.sonn@aggiemaiLusu. edu ia B I O T E C H HAVE YOU BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH ADOLESCENT ID1OPATHIC SCOLIOSIS? GENETIC RESEARCH Early genetic research at Axial Biotech suggests that in the near future physicians may be able to diagnose and treat patients with AIS before they even develop symptoms. ARE YOU A CANDIDATE? Axial Biotech is enrolling patients who have been diagnosed with AIS. To participate in this clinical trial, patients must meet the following criteria: 1513 N. Hillfield Rd., Suite 3 (801) 752-O485 • Have a diagnosis of AIS • Received the diagnosis during adolescence (ages 8-15) • Have a mild form of AIS (Curve of 5° - 24°) • Are currently 16 years or older (under 18 must have parental permission) HOW YOU CAN HELP? You can help in this important research by contacting Axial Biotech and allowing us to know how scoliosis has affected you. Participation in the study involves: • Providing a DNA Saliva Sample • Completing a phone interview or an online questionnaire • Allowing your physician to provide copies of spinal x-rays and medical records To learn more about this study, please contact a Clinical Research Coordinator at 1 -888-992-9425 or visit www.axialbiotech.com |