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Show 7 'Wicker Man just another tired remake This film is a remake from the 1973 until he reaches the horrifying truth. original, based on and adapted from It's too bad that nobody was searching ^ i ^ through these beautithe screenplay writ- _ ^ _ ^ _ ^ _ i * u l foists for a way to ten by Anthony Schaffer m a k e thjs f H m better ("Sommersby"). While With tiny clues prothere are a lot of odd vided along the way, conversations and strange and some unexpected happenings throughout, twists, "The Wicker "The Wicker Man" ends Man" seems to have all up being a sadly unfulthe necessary ingredifilling mystery film. Nicolas Cage ("World Rated PG-13, Grade & ents, but nothing amazing comes out of it. Trade Center") is a cop The Wickerman ^ ^ ^ ^ The primary living in a small, compla- _ _ ^ _ ^ ^ _ _ reason for the film's cent town who receives a letter from his ex-fiance (Kate Beahan, shortcomings is the writing. Neil LaBute "Flightplan") pleading for his help. Who ("Nurse Betty") not only directed the film, cares if he hasn't heard from his long lost but he also wrote/adapted the screenplay. love for so many years? He quickly leaves Maybe he ended up being so busy with directing ihe film that he neglected his town to find her and offer aid. Cage travels to a bucolic, secluded other dut'es. So much of the dialogue island in the Pacific Northwest to find is awkward, bumbling and poorly deliva peculiar settlement full of dominant ered, making us think, "Are they trying to women, bee colonies and identical twins. sound t^is cheesy, or is it just natural?" His ex-fiance has a missing child some- With sich a noticeably amateurish style where on the island that she is desperate of writing, it is impossible to take the film to find. Can the small-town policeman seriously and not much of the suspense get to the bottom of this obscure mystery? is powerful. Still, we keep watching the With little help from the ambiguous citi- mystery unfold and waiting for an explazens, Cage forges on through the beauti- naticn of all the weird behavior that Cage fully forested island searching for clues encounters. Reel eviews Everyone's a Critic The acting is as good as it can be, even with amazing stars like Nicolas Cage and Ellen Burstyn ("Requiem for a Dream"), who plays a sweet and secretive matriarch with just the right touch of eeriness. Frances Conroy ("Six Feet Under") as the benevolent town doctor and Molly Parker ("Iron Jawed Angels") as the rigid schoolteacher both give helpful performances that keep the vague plot interesting. But even though the actors are trying their best, nobody gives anything memorable or prevailing. Thrown into this uneven mess are numerous shots of picturesque landscapes alluding to the ptrivate paradise of an untouched island. This paradise, however, is only skin deep. "The Wicker Man" has more than enough moments that will make your head tilt and your nose crinkle, as any mystery film should. It also has more than enough one-liners to make your eyes roll and a conclusion that clearly tries its best to be shocking and over the top, but plummets tragically into the nether regions of unsuccessful remakes. Casey T. Allen is the Statesman's movie critic. His reviews will appear weekly in the Diversions section. Comments can be sent to caseyal@cc.usu.edu. The Big Picture What others across the country are saying "The Wicker Man" is comically inept as a horror movie, unable to even manage an effective false scare, or sustain suspense for more than a beat or two. A. O. Scott, New York Times What USU students are saying about "The Wicker Man" w, , A half-compelling, half-goofy and half-redundant X wasand overdone, unre- pkce ofremake revisionism. (Yes, that's three distic not even halves, but it's that weird a movie.) scary." Scott Weinburg, Starr Basset, Cinematical senior, liberal arts 0 Pre-Emptive - Critics • / / The Pbtector' • Who is the Protector? V\iat is he protecting? Maybe the enviroment. Pocket, peij aps? I don't know; all I knows Tony Jaa'is in this movie. All I know about Tony Jaa is in nis last movie he lit his legs on fire and then kickeqa guy in. the head. All I know about kickiig someone with your legs on fire is that it's the secorf manliest thing you can do - ever. /' Ifs mathematically prove i: fire/f legs + kicking = awesome. ,1 I know what those of yoti who have heard about this movie are thinking, "What/Ton J Jaa is fighting for some elephants? That's stupid." ; I Well, all I hear is, "Blah blahfclah, Tony Jaa is fighting and he's probably gonna set hialegs on fire." Even if we don't get to see the fire kick, the trailer does have him leaping off a skyscraper to kick a bad guy who is hanging from a helicopter injhe chest. ' That is Oscar-worthy actingir you ask me. And if you don't ask me, p i going to set my legs on fire and kick you. / I preemptively love this npvie. -by Steve Shinrey/steveshinney®cc.usu.edu £rts • Entertainment • Outdoors • Culture Steppin' Out This Weekend Friday, Sept. 8 •There will be a College Bowl at 7 P-m. at the Lundstrum Center as part of Residence Life Week. • T h e Celebrate America Show will continue tonight and Saturday night in the TSC Ballroom. The show starts at 7 p.m. • T o kick off the Utah State Fair, Raven Symone will be performing at the Utah Stare Fairpark with special guest Lil J. The show starts at 7:30 p.m. and addmission is free. Saturday, Sept. 9 •Logan Parks and Rec will be holding the final demoltion derby of the season and the Cache County Fairgrounds. The destruction begins at 7 p-m. with a dance contest to follow. Tickets are $8 for adults and proceeds will go to the Bryan Seeholzer Youth Scholarship Fund. • T h e Utah Symphony will be performing Vivace Uncorked at 8 p.m. at Abravanel Hall at 123 W South Temple. The event is described as a chance to enjoy classical music without all the rules. Student tickets are $15. • T h e Logan to Jackson bike race starts in downtown Logan with racers leaving at 7:45 a.m and peddling all the way to Jackson Hole. The LOTOJA is the longest one-day bike event in the United States. Want something posted on VENUES? Send to statesman@cc.usu.edu < ."$ i>:S$§§f Coven ent « Once upon a time, there was an actor named Ben-* Affleck — I mean, George Reeves — who starred i n " "Good Will Hunting" — I mean TV's Superman — and then took roles in the worst movies of the past 10 years — I mean killed himself. Or did he? "Hollywoodland" is a bit of a mixed bag, managing to be a murder mystery, a Superman movie and Ben Affleck's supposed return to grace after years behind the proverbial eight-ball of casting, while still asking two of the toughest questions this side of your calculus test: Was the death of TV's first Superman, George Reeves, a murder or a suicide? And second, did Ben Affleck, who amazed the world by co-writing and starring in "Good Will Hunting/' -really choose to date J. Lo and be in such awful movies as "Surviving Christmas/' or was it his evil body doubler* .;•.This is the brilliance of "Hollywoodland." Even after the media blitz that has anticipated its release, I'm still not sure if it's really about George Reeves or if ifs merely a metaphor of Ben Affleck's acting career. But, either way, the suspense is killing me — get it? Killing me? Maybe this movie and George Reeve's suicide are a metaphor for my experiences with this movie. And all that mystery is why I preemptively love "Hollywoodland." -By Zach PeiHdleton/zpendleton@cc.usu.edu There has been a lot of criticism about the lack of '^original material emerging from the vacuous halls of Hollywood these days, and for good reason.1 From "King Kong" to "Pirates of the Caribbean 2," all of the biggest, highest grossing films are either reverent remakes or superfluous sequels. I mean, when the great Depp himself commits to the same role more than once, you know there must be some collective desperation for new material. But if the only original material Hollywood's hackneyed screenwriters can seem to spew forth from pens that would apparently be better off without any ink is this prepubescent travesty, than I'll take "Fast and the Furious 4." Personally, I like my supernatural teen angst without an imitation goth vibe. And without acting so repulsive that it makes Hayden Christiansen's "Mannequin" Skywalker resonate like Sean Penn's turn in "Mystic River." Oh yeah, and special effects that don't look like they came from the CW network's rejected "Aquaman" pilot. But, hey, if watching the film's undercooked trailer prompts you to lightsome candles and start chanting, just make sure that the blood oath you take is to never, ever see "The Covenant." ; N I preemptively hate this movie. -By Mack Perry/mackp@cc.usu.edu The pre-emptive critics write knee-jerk analyses of upcoming films based solely on hearsay, advance publicity and—most importantly — movie trailers. They have not seen the movies. • CELEBRATION CENTRE From page 7 4 Boom, a 367-foot tower that Checketts said is the tallest drop-ride in the world - and it doesn't have brakes. A mannequin stood at the top of the Sonic Boom to represent Checketts, who said he stands at the top of his new rides, including the debut of the Stratosphere in Las Vegas. The ride has been in construction for two years, although Checketts said he had the idea for it more than 10 years ago. The Sonic Boom is an enormous metal tower climbed by a two-person car that overlooks spectacular view of Cache Valley. When the riders are ready, the press of a red button plunges the car into a freefall, where the passengers experience four seconds of negative G forces. The car then hits the tube at the bottom of the tower and the air compressing under the rap- idly descending car creates brakes. When looking at the Sonic Boom, one doubts if it will hold the weight of a child, much less an adult. The metal is rusty-looking, but Checketts said the ride was purposely distressed to add to the thrill. "What makes me happy is thrilling people," Checketts said. "I didn't realize that for 50 years of my life." A white cowboy hat tops light brown hair speckled with gray and a grin crosses Checketts' face as he talks about starting his business with bungee rides in 1989. The seemingly easy-going man joked with Logan Mayor Randy Watts, calling him a "punk kid" and carried a heavy tripod for one reporter. Checketts said he was born and raised in Providence, but has lived in many states and held many jobs, including being a cabi- netmaker, until he realized thrilling people and bringing smiles to faces is what he really wanted to do. His company, S & S Worldwide, which stands for Stan and Sandy after he and his wife, has created about 10 high-thrill rides since it began. "I'm not a high-thrillride person and even though I don't ride the rides, I support him in all his crazy endeavors," Sandy Checketts said. "Whatever he does is fun and makes people smile. He can hardly wait to get to work in the morning." Checketts said he has given up trying to get his wife on the rides. "She used to ride with me," he said, "but quit when we went to Japan on a ride that was 220 feet tall. She hasn't ridden since." The kitchen manager, Jimi Wright, said she enjoys working at the Celebration 4 Centre because Checketts is "just like a big kid; he loves to have fun." Additional activities at the Celebration Centre include a rock climbing wall, a large playplace for kids and an entire floor of more than 70 arcade games and a pool table. From the ceiling of the building hang all the state flags and flags from countries around the world.,A kitchen also provides food for customers or for groups that have reserved the area for parties. "Our plans are to keep a nice atmosphere for people locally to come and enjoy. We're excited to debut rides from around the world," Checketts said. "We have 40 acres and they'll build more rides even after I'm dead and gone." The Celebration Centre is open Monday through Saturday from noon to 10 p.m., although the go-karts Rachael Schulz/mrach5@(c.usu.edu BIG BLUE AND LINDSAY MOUNTEER strap them selves in for a ride on the Sling Shot at the opening of the Celebration Centre Wednesday afternoon. and high thrill rides are only open from 5 p.m. to 10 p.m. Party and group discounts are available. For more information, call 7524215 or visit www.logancelebrationcentre.com. —dilewis@cc.usu.edu |