Show r t 1 mr by walt mason t 4 the man who knows he s always right that what he says is final ul uon on his frame men long to I 1 and jar his column sp nil no mat t I 1 lr l r what the theme may be that we may be d cuss ng I 1 know the facts by james says he so quit your fool sh fuss ng just listen to jour our uncle tell the truth of all such mat and you 11 be do ng wisely N well ell thus wearily ea rily he chatters what oth ers say s merely alov blo v their minds are blank and stranded he talks of facts and truths as though he had them bought and branded you start to alk about the war old gets bu y I 1 know just ahat hat they are fight ng for your statements all are dizzy I 1 have the facts I 1 ra in the s vun vim and I 1 w will ill put you wiser my brother brothers s uncle uncles s cousin jim is hostler to the kaiser he a next to all gong on and tells me of the doin doings s so he maintains till day s gene gone h s endless linen chew ings hes he s alas loaded with ith the facts ahle h ie others deal in fiction he shoots them forth in cataracts throughout his jurisdiction juris not long ago a man came into this effice and stopped hs h a paper because he be said it was al at printing a lot of things about the same people and he lie said he was N as sick of it io no v when ng goes wrong w m th the coun try the government appoints appo ants a corn com in mission vision to investigate and find out what is the matter and the first thing a commission investigates is the man who made the holler to see if the holler was a reasonable holler so we appointed appon appo anted ted a commission con misting of ourselves ir selves to investigate this man we just fol followed lomed the mans career ever since we ie knew h in the first thing that happened halpen ed to that man was that he was born but he had noth ng to do with it however we mentioned hm 1 pi I though hs parents were vere entitled entill d to the credit when he was as in his eaily early twenties enties he got married we men jt tinned that including the nam of the bride the preacher etc in tact fact ve mentioned evereth ng but the I 1 fee wh ch eb was A as not worth mention n ng we never in m the fact that he be never won any prem alums at the count fair because he never exhibited anything adyth ng we never mentioned his name in the list ot of co nm because he never attend attena ed we never mentioned his name in the list of donors b cause he never donated as much as a doughnut U we e certainly certa have been treating th s man shamefully but we i vill V ill agree to run a nice obituary ahen the time tune comes cornes litchfiel Litch fied illi nois new news s herald |