Show s f i t fables in slang I 1 I 1 I 1 j by george ade the new now fable of the young fellow who had no father to guide him once there was a boy who had been told twice a day ever since he could remember that it if he started to go into one of those Dog geries with swinging doors in front and mirrors along the side a blue flame would shoot out and burn him to a cinder also he had been warned that every playing card in the whole deck was a complimentary ticket admitting one to 66 hot griddle in the main maja par quette of the fiery furnace and every little paper cigar was another spike in the burial casket with seven or eight guardians trail ing him day and night to keep him away from the lures of the wicked world it looked like a pipe that he would grow up to be the dean of a theological seminary across the street lived a poor un fortunate lad whose father was mak ing the futile endeavor to take it away taster faster than the revenue officers could put stamps on it he was the original blotter when they were try ing to pry him away from it he would take a chance on anything from ar nica alca to extract of vanilla according to all the laws of hered ity the only son was cast tor for the part of joe morgan he ile Is now the head of a mall mail order house when he sees a corkscrew he pulls his hat firmly over his ears and runs a mile the graduate of the lecture bureau may be found in a swagger club any evening with a bourbon H B at his right a stack of student lamps at his lett left and two small pair pressed i closely against bis his bosom MORAL the modern ambition seems to be to vary the program |