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Show DAILY HERALD Sunday. August 19, 2007 C3 TODAY IN HISTORY farewell as he concluded a four-davisit to the Krakow - region of Poland (it turned Today's Highlight in History: out to be his last visit to his Today is Sunday, Aug. JLL 19, the 231st day of 2007. There are 134 days left in the year. VU WARNING: SOME MATERIAL NOT SUITABLE FOR SERIOUS PEOPLE the USS On Aug. 19; 1112, . ' y homeland).'. Constitution defeated the One year ago: Israeli com- British frigate Guerriere off .. mandos raided a Hezbollah Nova Scotia during the War stronghold deep in Lebanon, of 1812. (Israel said the raid was On this date:. launched to stop arms smug- In 1807, Robert Fultons gling from Iran and Syria to North River Steamboat ar-the militant Shiite fighters; rived in Albany, two days Lebanon called the operation a "flagrant violation" of a after leaving NewYork. U.N. truce.) In 1929, the radio comedy , program "Amos n Andy," Today's Birthdays: Ac- Gosden Freeman lor L.Q. Jones is 80. Author starring and Charles Gorrell, made its' Frank McCourt is 77. Actress ; coast debut on the . Debra Paget is 74. Tennis NBC Blue Network.: coach Renee Richards is 73. In 1934, a plebiscite in Ger- - Actress Diana Muldaur is 69. Rock musician Ginger many approved the vesting of sole executive power in ; Baker (Cream, Blind Faith) is 68. Singer Johnny Nash is .. Adolf Hitler. 67. Actress Jill St. John is 67. ' In 1942, about 6,000 Ca- nadian and British soldiers Actor and former U.S. Sen. launched a disastrous raid Fred Thompson is 65. Singer , Billy J. Kramer is 64. against the Germans at France, suffering Eddy try more than 50 percent casual-- . Raven is 63. Rock singer lan' ., v Gillan (Deep Purple) is 62. ties. In 1955, severe flooding in Former President Clinton is e the northeastern U.S. claimed 61, Tipper Gore, wife of 200 lives. mer Vice President Al Gore, In I960, a tribunal in Mos- - is 59. Actor Gerald McRaney cow convicted American U2 is 59. Rock musician John pilot Francis Gary Powers of Deacon (Queen) is 56. Actor Jonathan Ftakes is 55., Actor. espionage. In 1976, President Gerald ' Peter Gallagher is 52. Actor Ford won the Republican Adam Arkin is 51. Singer-- . presidential nomination at the songwriter Gary Chapman is party's convention in Kansas 50. Actor Martin Donovan is ; 50. Rhythm-and-blue- s City, Mo. .. singer In 1977, comedian Groucho Ivan Neville is 48. Actor Marx died in Lps Angeles at - Eric Lutes is 45i. Actor John Stamos is 44. Actress Kyra age 86.' In 1982, Soviet cosmonaut Sedgwick is 42. Actor Kevin Svetlana Savitskaya became Dillonis 42. Country singer the second woman tobe. Lee Ann Womack is 41.. TV launched into space. reporter Tabitha Soren is 40. In 1991, Soviet hard-lin- Country Mark McGuinnis.39. Actor ers announced to a shocked world that President Mikhail Matthew Perry is 3& Country S. Gorbachev had been re-- . singer Clay Walker is 38. moved from power. (The Rapper Fat Joe is 37. Tennis two days coup collapsed player Mary Joe Fernandez ' is 36. Actress Trade Thoms later) ' Ten yean ago: Carl Drega, is 32. Country singer Rissi a resident Of Cole- - Palmer is 26. Actress Erika Christensen is 25. Country brook, N.H., shot and killed a part-tim- e singer Karli Osborn judge, two state and a newspaper A1SY) is 23. Actor J. Evan editor before being killed in a Bonifant is 22. Rapper Romeo is 18. gun battle with police. ' Five yean ago: A Russian Thought for Today: Cheer military helicopter crashed ... up! The worst is yet to come!"., after being shot down by Philander Chase Johnson;, ' rebels in Chechnya; killingAmerican author --127 people. Art ailing and ag-- . r : ' ing John Paid II bid a tearful The Associated Press' . . This classic DAVE BARRY column was originally published Jan 28,1997. wards. There is nothing quite readers Bill and Louisa Sonnik, like the sense of intellectual accomplishment that comes from spelling out, say, knowing that it will be sitting there on the board for hours, staring up at your opponents. The problem with Scrabble is that it leads to arguments like this: " FIRST PLAYER: ... e, e, t. There! , here's a nostalgia What game does this remind you of? Colonel Mustard in the library with a candlestick. If you answered, Spin the Bottle," then I frankly do not want to know any more about SECOND PLAYER: "gleet?" What the ben is "gleet"? your childhood. What Im v FIRST PLAYER: I have no referring to is, of course; the ; classic board game due, in but if you can use pood, idea, t which you try to solve a mur- - . I can use gleet der by using a logical process The thing is, according of deduction to narrow down to the American Heritage healthy percentage. the various possibilities until ; ' I will say this about MonopDictionary, bath "gleet and your sister has to go to the oly; 1 was bettCr at it than at "poodreally are words, as , chess. My problem with chess are "kloof," "fremitus" and bathroom, at which point you cheat by looking at the answer was that ail my pieces wanted It turns out that, cards. At least that was always to end the game as soon as if you have a big enough die- - ; my strategy. ; possible. Lets get this over : t ionary, just about everything , In Monopoly, my strategy with.1" was their battle cry. If is a word, which means you , was to be the car. The car was ' the rules had allowed it, my can put down any okl letters one of the little metal game- - - pieces would all have charged you want and claim its a legal; board pieces; the other ones, as out onto the board simultane'move I recall, were the hat, the dog, -- ously the instant the game Of course you have to be ' the shoe, the guy on the horse .. started. Unfortunately, this careful whom you're playing ' was not legal, so they had to andthe iron. I never wanted with. The number of violent to be the shoe, and I definitely content themselves with charg- Scrabble-relate- d incidents is did not want to be the iron. I on the rise. I have here a news ing out one at a time, pretty wanted to be the car because ' much at random, and immediitem from the Nov. 29, 1996, I could make car noises by ately getting captured. Here's Hagerstown, Md.,' Morning ' what they sounded like: Herald, sent to me by alert vibrating my lips brrrrm-mmmand drive the car PAWNS: Oh, no! They got around on the floor to amuse the Knight! myself while waiting my turn, ' KING Darn it! ' which is mainly what you do in. BISHOP: 111 go next! KING Good luck! Monopoly, which I always conPAWNS: Oh, no! They got sidered to be raw of t he most boring activities on the planet. the Bishop! KING Darn it! . Bid I had friends who loved it; when we played, they beQUEEN: IU go next! .' came insane, money grasping KING Good luck! .. PAWNS: Oh, no! They got , capitalist pigs. Theyd crouch next to the game board, look- - the Queen!. KING Good! I mean, Darn it! ing over the tops of their hotels Because of the level of my r with greed-crazeeyes, watch-- , chess game, I was able even ing me throw the dice, wait- ing for the little car to come .. .against a weak opponent, such around the corner, motoring as my younger brothers or the brrrrm-mmminnocentlyalong dog to get myself checkmated in under three minutqf. until it stopped on I challenge any computer to do Hah! Boardwalk, and it faster. ., theyd triumphantly announce that 1 owed them some huge The one board game that amount of pretend money that I still play is Scrabble. I like. they knew to the exact pretend it because, unlike most othercost of landing on Boardwalk board games, which basically ; Without looking at the cards. are pointless in Scrabble you can do some' Im not saying that all of these friends went on to bething mentally stimulating and worthwhile: make naughty. come attorneys, but it was a OK, Dave Barry . . . . . : . . . Coun-Diepp- singer-songwrit- I Dave Barry is a columnist for. the Miami Herald. He . . . . . ' : . ! . V singer-songwrit- . ; . . . . : . . : . : - d . . er : is continuing a leave of absence from writing his weekly humor column. Write to him do The Miami Herald,-OnHerald Plaza, Miami, Fla. 33132. : e, for-som- : . . . . . . : Here are the first two sentences of this item, which I am not making up: SM1THSBURG A Hagerstown woman was charged withsecond-degre- e assault on Wednesday night after her husband was struck in the forehead with a Scrabble game board, according to the Washington County Sheriffs Department. The incident happened when the man tried to restrain the woman after she threw the Thanksgiving turkey into the yard. The item does not state why. .. the woman threw the turkey, . but I would not be surprised to learn that a word like gleet" ' had something to do with it. I would also not be surprised if, next Thanksgiving, this couple leaves the Scrabble board in the closet and just throws the turkey, which sounds like more fun. - (1866-1939- ). r1-- . . HOROSCOPE fUGfNIA'lASVdNRA'Y. . - AUGUST !r i') ' . . catching up pn the things that need tending to at home. 4 , stars v t. LIBRA (Sept 22): will fcrsonul talk Someone to Happy Birthday: you try out of your cash Dun) donate changes must be mode in your life and taking the steps , to something or someone you know little about. A creative to do so will be up to you. idea you have can be worked Opposition is apparent but don) give in to someone who on. bringing about an end re-- . suit that is:niarketable. 3 stars is stuck in hjs or her ways, SCORPIO (Oct Move forward - its you who 21): must initiate what's neces-- . Youll be ajl wrapped up in sary to make your life betler. your own little world, so don) Your numbers are 3, 8, 10, 24, be surprised if someone gives call regarding .32,44 you a wake-uARIES (March 19): your personal responsibilities. You'll be drawn to the unusu-- Honesty and integrity mast aL People who have a talent be put first. Do something un-- . usual for someone you kve. or are unusual in some way 3 stars will teach you valuable les- SAGITTARIUS (Nov. sons about yourself. Socializ- ing should be penciled in and 21): You will attract some pos-- . love and romance planned out ilive attention that can help carefully. 3 stars you in the future. Someone TAURUS (April 20): unique will catch your eye. Be You'll be pulled in several dif- - careful - see if this person is ferent directions. Stay calm already involved in something and be the observer. Problems that may be a conflict of mter-wit- h friends, children and lav- - est for you. 3 stars CAPRICORN (Dec. ers can be. sorted out but not .. .. until you've had time to dis- 19); You will have some.very cover the root of the problem.. . unique ideas and. if presented 3 stars properly, you.should be able ; GEMINI (May to persuade others to jump on 20): Someone you work with may your bandwagon. A partner-b- e on your mind. If you feel ship is possible hut consider you have been treated poorly, what each candidate has to. ; offer before you proceed. 4 put together a case so you can fight for your rights. . stars Before you do, ask a trusted IS): AQUARIUS (Jan. Be careful not to hurl some- friend -- you may be overre- one's feelings. Problems will acting. 3 start CANCER (June 21 July 22): arise if money is tight or you or someone you are close to Children, family and friends will all play a major role in has overspent. Don) get life and the decisions gry: There are other ways to satisfy both your needs with-o- f you make today. A change out causing a fuss. 2 stars . scenery will do you good, PISCES (Feb. 20): Rest and relaxation and per- You have a good idea, so haps a little pampering will boost your energy and your take the time to put it down on paper. Money is heading confidence. 5 stars LEO (July 22): Don) your way and. if you follow let anger take over or a jeal- - through with something you ous encounter ruin your day. believe in. it will bring you You should be out and about .respect, clout and a cash re- ward. 5 stars .. having fun with friends or Rirthday laby: You are hooking up with someone from your past Don) station dedicated and intense and yourself where abuse will find, will not tolerate anyone who opposes you. You have a you. 2 stars VIRGO (Aug. 22): strong tieto home, family and Problems with authority. tradition and will defend your while traveling or when deal- - beliefs, values and ethics. ing with friends, relatives or neighbors will lead to hurt. Eugenia's Web sites: an altercation or an accident, astroadvice.com for fun, eugenialasf.com for Spare yourself any grief by confidential consultations keeping a low profile and CELEBRITIES BORN ON THIS DAY; Romeo, J8; Matthew Perry, 38; Lee Ann Womack, 41; Adam Arkin, 51 . . - - . . by Chuck Shepherd Krichbaum, 12, of I Adrian, Mich., has had ' II vk an obsession with vacuum cleaners since infancy, when he was mesmerized by the whirring, said hi$ mother, and for years, he says, he has .. enjoyed vacuuming so much that he does the house up to five times a day, with one of the 165 new and used vacuum cleaners in his collection. Said a former teacher, "It's not that he didnt like recess. He just preferred to stay inside vacuuming." Older sister Michelle; interviewed for a July CBS News profile of Kyle, spoke for all of us: "He's constantly vacuuming. I'm just like why, ' why, why, why, why, why? I dont understand." Pyle I early released, and since that would take away their "free ' housing for the remainder of their sentences, awarded each released person "room and board" expenses to live on until their terms expired. (2) Britains Prison Service announced in May that inmate" ... obesity was such a problem that it had hired "dazenspf ' fitness trainers to serve at 25 e U.K. jails. Trainers will individualized exercise routines and holistic, alterna-tiv- e (herap(ies)." according to . a report in The Sun. I Seven yehrs ago, the city council of Bainbridge Island, Wash., set out to build a public restroom for downtown Waterfront Park so visitors would no longer have to use the Government in action! ; portable toilets. Today,followtoilets are still there, I In April, Britain's Ofing council battles over fice of Work and Pensions proposals such as a glass-tilestructure dug acknowledged to the Daily Mail that the multiple wives ' into a hillside, a combination of polygamous husbands who rest roomscenic-vieing area, and a design that anticipated are legally in the country, rou$45,000 just for artwork. In tinely draw dependents unfrom allowances May 2007, the council gave employment the government (even though the public works director polygamy itself is illegal in the some money and ordered him U.K.). A single person receives to (in the words of one council the equivalent of about $120 member)"just (build) a bath- a week, and a married couple room." I In February, a New Jersey about $180, with each additional wife about $60.) appeals court ruled against the town of VoOrhees, which I Miles Nurse and Jennifer had waged a nearly three- Plomt, condominium owners in Vancouver, British Columyear battle with a business- man because it disputed the bia, learned in July that they woiild have to cohabit with as shade of paint he had used in-on his Friendlys restaurant. many as 80 bats that had . fested their unit for the follow- Town officials said it wasn't ing six weeks because the B.G sandy (the required color for buildings in that particular Wildlife Act prevents disturbshopping center), but rather ing the critters during their "creamy yellow. The townmating season, which would end in late August. At press ship spent $20,000 fighting for time for a July Vancouver Sum "sandy, and the restaurateur spent $70,000 to show that story, the couple had found one bat in bed with them, an"Creamy yellow" matched the other buildings, and the apother hanging upside down from a bathroom door frame peals court judges seemingly and five in the ceiling over a just shrugged. kitchen pantry. I Its Good to Be a British Great art! Prisoner: (1) Faced with overThe Horror of Wan A U.S. crowding. the government law professor representannounced earlier this year that 25,500 inmates would be ing Guantanamo prisoners ; -- . . pro-vid- - . . . d w . . compiled a book of poems by Some of the detainees, to be published this month by University of Iowa Press , and featuring a cover blurb by former U.S. poet laureate . Robert Pinsky. Among the verses, for example, by Sami al Haj, quoted in a June Wall Street Journal story: "When I heard the pigeons cooing in the trees Hot tears covered my face and "My soul is like a roiling sea, stirred by an- guish Violent with passion." The U.S. military had to ap-prove the text, citing the ease . with which imagery could be ' used as coded messages to colleagues outside. . 49, was arrested in Manchester, N.H., iii July and charged as the man who robbed a Citizen Bank branch dressed as a tree (branches duct taped to , his body and head, obscuring much of his face, though he was still identified from the security camera). (2) A pros- ecutor in Chelsea, Vt., refused in June to pursue police of- - . ficers' charges against Jayna Hutchinson, 33, that she had .committed a crime because she made faces at a police dog. and "star(ed) at him. (1) Authorities in Doylestown, Pa., arrested 34 people after a seven-mont- h police investigation of drugdealing, which began last December when a man on probation gave the police information about the ring in order to avoid going back to prison. He had been facing a charge of public urination. (2) Chicago police arrested three in June alleged dope-selleafter casually spotting one of them inside a garage with the door open, bagging $670,000 worth of marijuana. The police came upon the garage while chasing a man who had been urinating in public. p . . . . 2Z-D- 20-M- : ; . .. . 20-Fe-b. . (1) Police in Brandon, Fla., -- arrested Willie Tarpley Jr., 46, in May, alleging that he killed his boyfriend because he was upset that she was dating a man who was a registered sex offender (even though Tarpley and his e are reportedly also registered sex offenders). (2) At a Toronto nursing home ' in May, a resident angrily kicked a fellow resident, causing him to fall and fatally hit his head. The victim had taken up with a female resident, thinking she was his wife, but the jealous younger man thought the woman was his own wife. She was actually married to neither; all three had Alzheimer's disease. (No charges were filed.) . . g. ld . . Visit Chuck Shepherd daily blogspot.com or ivww. NewsoftheWeird.com. Send your Weird News to WeirdNewsTipsyahoo.com orP.O. Box 18737, Tampa, FL 33679. an-yo- . , ex-wif- at httpJNewsoftheWeird. . - 's . . nf Undignified deaths . 22-Ja- . - i -- Public urination and . drug law enforcement ! I Least Competent Criminals: (1) In May, Damkxi Mosher, 18, of Lake Luzerne, N.Y became the most recent person to injure himself by. needing to find out if putting a bullet into a vise and hitting .. it with a screwdriver would cause it to fire. (It would; he was slightly wounded.) (2) Two men and a woman were among the recent wave of people trying to cash in on the high price of copper scrap metal when they broke into an abandoned nursing home in Gainesville, Ga., in July. How-eve- r, they had missed the sign at the entrance announcing that thebuiiding had recently been converted into a training facility and kennel for police dogs, and they were quickly sicced on and arrested. . . Police Report I (1) James Coldwell, . Reairring themes . . 23-Se- pt CJlJl'J.GaUOuiijIUG.COm . |