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Show MARCH | GARIN 1997 VESDAYS accoustic pu0/ e APPIN’ SAY TED APPAPGRT A.K.A. THE MeGUINNESS BROS STARTS AT IO ARRIVE C CET The Legislature THURSDAY MARCH 13 & 27 THURSDAY MARCH 6&20 Private Club for Members ROS Proves Utah Is a Weird Place MR. |: By .B. Rappaport FRIDAY MARCH 7 INSATIABLE raise the lord and The state’s FEVER ERBORAD DAR meeting, anon is, has MARCH the they've helped nude dancing - cigarette tax — up; — up; wastes — fees for down; imported damnation Utah stops Legislature playing the it seems to its real hierarchy Stamping of out sin morality Choir our white, the Legislature They want hate dancing hate ee and abortion Jazz the minority from again proven a beat. off the but in backs the and woman adult right booze videos. this Deseret, to choose has to view a video righteous, can unbalance Say, amen, are . . . Legislature in the education so the tyranny of the sanctimonious, of white- conservatives that here, have in the state of the basic tenets of democracy bed- and you're big judgment. forgotten, if they ever Democracy must protect Mormon-domimisses when well, knowledge and Please, a absent. that failure, the ignorant They they’re proves is public these education they lack This Utah because system any are kind of in civics. let's not even touch on ethics. If there was a break from all this ‘ that insight and The Legislature into it by new hates pouring roads, ignoring crisis and the for Transportation, they growing the simply past But they don’t hate buying put, is new roads as much as they hate putting money into the state education system, which boasts some of the most crowd- august body met President it Beattie finally admitted that when his proved Senate dialogue, came money when progressive Is this a weird state, or what? decade. Lane last year in secret to plan an attack on gay clubs in public schools it flew in the face of the Utah Open Meetings Act. This after they fought the ACLU all the way to the State Supreme Court and lost. For these all their modern-day self-righteousness, Mormons seem to like the University of Utah are seen by know little of their heritage. Because Brigham Young would find them less than misguided and failing in all the our lawmakers as disgusting dens of sin true measures where munity ed classrooms in the nation. And places young people want to become enlightened. Banish the thought. PAGE Having knew, that group just that. transportation & Skin Products House down That’s undeniably weird. bread just not a righteous calling. Full Service turn brothers and sisters. Say, amen. majority, cigarettes, a woman’s pronounces on Products see, righteous as the made it law that each woman seeking 801-655-9342 No Animal ae to gift however your productsef nude an You no Jell-O. never interests its calling. green government special LDS all is as Utahn and male, nated They Safe Products proclaimed job might interfere with all those embar- con- in is, after all, a righteous Legislating Tabernacle rooms of every man oe your es, free dinners or pass legislation that for state. SALE not rassing gifts. of MOVING wealth,” 47 porations And APRIL the than to redistrib- basketball tickets, free trips, free lunch- forms ee ute taxes a coincidence. business Robert Redford — down; lawmakers receiving gifts — up; funding for the arts — down; tax breaks for big cor- Church. Natural Products for Skin & Hair lower what our Speaker Mel Brown. Right Mel, and it’s down; stituency: Utah “It's not also — The City, have other states. Gee, con- funding never Park taxes. den in the West. Corporations in Utah of abortions — up; funding for day care down; legislative stupidity up, Up, UP! “Bo hate for another us this year: — in; who Utah has the largest individual tax bur- out; highway funding — up; education toxic ountain §— 53) Main st. of those State Utah adjourned Legislature strikes the conser- pose They publicly decry tax boosts, while meanwhile, how VOODOO SWING IRIE HEIGHTS vative the Here’s an unofficial scorecard SATURDAY MARCH 29 | 28 of Priesthood year. GONE cealed weapons FRIDAY Our the ammu- version Mormon that Legislature, pass 1997 largest 14 of real leadership, and stewardship. And com- I'll bet he’d also find them downright weird. @ |