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Show there protecting the town of bear and threatens Daniel with enforcement personnel, Monticello by catching huge his life if he doesnt quit Christine Adams, Dana ferocious bears with donuts all teasing. Young, and RT, Marci, Mad, the time, taking no care for my "Daniel, you dork, if you do Easton Nielson, Sanford and that again 111 knock your block Laurie Randall, and an own life or limb. unknown photographer all We sedate BooBoo, measure off! show up at Jeff and Alisas back to Daniel the him the Now, goes him, truck way up door house. house over of release him. the looking mountain, then Without any thought of the the golf course and yells again, Finally, the traveling circus peril to myself, I bravely stand "Nikki theres a bear. Really!" chases the bear and Nikki doesnt believe him for eventually loses it some where on top of the truck cab as the DWRrGuy unlocks the door, several minutes but finally north of town. I checked the drags the bear out of the trap, decides her responsibility as bear trap Saturday night, and sends him running. I babysitter demands that she there was no bear. I checked explained that I would prefer check it out and much to her the bear trap Sunday to report the news, not make surprise there is a bear. The morning, there was fresh bear situation quickly goes from bad scat, but no bear. the news. The donuts were still there I thought my bear hunting to worse. Nikki calls her friend Camry so I am guessing that Michael. days were finished and my work was done. By Friday at Maughan (known for being Holyoak has not been out for 2 pjn. I called my sister-in-lacalm and level headed and another ride and Yogi is and proudly told her that I had never over- excitable) and smarter than BooBoo when it taken care of the mentions she can see the bear comes to traps. Finally, I was able to answer the question I bear problem and if on the gtlf course. decides she better call first raised, "Just where does she would just Camry hurry and bake me her grandma, Linda Lewis, who a bear scat?" Apparently, next an apple pie with decides that the Nielsons are to the trap out in the woods. P.S. As of Monday morning what was left of her under siege by the bear that we was of would the I in caught another bear in the Night Grizzly apple tree, consider the matter and calls 911. trap. We are all hoping that Within minutes Officer Kent this is the end of the bear dosed. Less than an hour Rowley,, other assorted law stories. later, she calls me THE SAN JUAN RECORD Wednesday, August 29, 2001 - Page 12 Just the bear facte. Is there anyone in some back to Monticello who hasn't seen a bear, known someone that has seen a bear, has a pile of bear scat in their yard, or have a bear story? Everywhere I go, it is bear mania . Yogi and BooBoo? Against these days. This is my school clothes and was thinking a nice bear skin loin clothe would help keep the plumbing from freezing during the upcoming winter, so can I help you catch better his judgement and only because I promised I wouldnt use his name in my article, he finally true bear story (for agreed. Meanwhile, the DWRpGuy and I set a bear trap at 4 p.m. on Thursday afternoon. We bait the trap with donuts. There was a small snafu at this point By 7 p.m. real). LastI week received a call from w - and she said, Wednesday my r, I think there is a evening, Michael bear eating my apples, tearing Holyoak is driving out my plum tree apart, and his leaving piles of... uhmmm.. of the canyon stuff... all over my driveway. where the bear Maybe if you caught it you trap and donuts could make a new back to are and has a big sister-in-la- Gar-Bea- school caveman outfit. smile on his face. I I she since Maybe stop and question thought should him. He said that was the CaveGuy, I know the answer to the age old the door to the bear question, "Just where does a trap was closed, bear scat? but there was no Now then, the story goes like bear in the trap. this, but it gets complicated, Okay, just for the so pay attention. Last Record, I am not Tuesday night, Rhett and Lori accusing him of Maughan tried chumming eating the donuts, bears into their yard by but I must say it looks awfully leaving steaks out on the suspicious. Here are the facts, barbecue. This was successful Michael goes into the canyon as Yogi and BooBoo smelled where the donuts are, when the top cut sirloin and tried to Michael comes out all the tear up the grill. donuts are gone but there is Rhetts courageous, no bear. All this when the doctor has although intellectually challenged dog. Cocoa,' goes told him to stay home and rest crazy (which he does for any with his neck brace. His only reason) and starts barking. witness was his youngest Rhett goes outside in his daughter, Haley, conveniently You underwear yelling, You asleep on the ' If shut be Donuts were . the up!! $& dog, you judge. wake up Rust (Black) there is there... Michael goes in... then Michael comes out... now the going to be && pay. While running around in his donuts are gone. Since all the bear bait, is underwear chasing Coco, several women go outside and gone, I go to the store and buy see him (Rhett), laugh, then more donuts so I can reset the call Lori and tell her that her trap. As I anr resetting the husband is outside in his trap, I take a bite out of each underwear again. Lori takes donut, because 1 just can) bear (no pun intended) to throw appropriate action. Scott Wednesday evening perfectly good donuts onto the and Cassie Boyle see a bear ground. I reset the trap and down by My Cave near the golf keep a close eye on the road course and walk up my street, leading to the bear trap just creating confusion and general in case Michael happens by hysteria by telling the moms again on his 4- - wheeler. that they just saw a huge Inside the trap, I take a bite black bear. of a sprinkle donut and place Everyone agrees it is it right near the trigger to the probably best ifthe kids do not trapdoor. Sprinkle donuts are play in the canyon. This is the favorite in our house so I sooooo typical of moms, to over figure that if anything will react whenever there are large lure him into a trap, a sprinkle carnivores and kids involved. donut will. Like they had never thought Friday morning, me and the DWR-Gu- y of eating their kids. go check the trap To add some kind of and there is a bear in it. I legitimacy to my story I decide. name the bear BooBoo and that I better call DWR and see promptly read him his if I can get the bare facts about Miranda Rights. I would just bears. Generally, I try to like say for the Record that remain 100 percent fact free, most bear hunters have to use so I hesitate at calling, since an assortment of dogs, teams, it may set a precedence and horses, satellites, my editor might actually want and other gadgetiy to catch' a me to report news. bear. But not me. Nosiree. I But I go ahead and call the just used sprinkle donuts. back and says, "Gar-BeaI have a bear I in my yard. r. . . (ha ha ha I am at my cleverness) laughing DWR-Gu- y and said, Hey, DWR-Guthis is the CaveGuy and I need y, Yup. Thats right. Sprinkle donuts get em every time. So the CaveGuy has been out shopping back-to-scho-ol problem and she is safe and sound and if she could just hurry up with the pie.' .. She screams in my ear, is There bear a darling. in my yard RIGHT now. Iam looking at the bear as we are talking... the bear is RIGHT here right NOW!" Being as quick as I am, I promptly deduce that there must be a bear in her yard right now. So I hurry down to her house and sure enough, there is a bear! You can imagine my surprise. And now just to demonstrate ' how small of a town we live in, and how fast gossip can travel... within five minutes of my arrival,' Officer Jim Eberling, RT Nielson, Annie and Josh Anderson, Easton "Gar-Bear.- . and Marci Nielson, Jamie Wright and Phyllis Vigil, all show up on my sister-in-ladeck looking for the bear. That just goes to show you that you cant ever keep a secret in . Monticello. I call DWR-Gu- y and say, "Hey, this is CaveGuy and we need the trap again as Yogi is looking for his picnic basket. set the trap again and leave, confident that the bear We - - Even the Caveman went assure' her that I have already taken care of her bear . , problems will soon be .solved and we can put Yogi and BooBoo together again, preferably up the mountain. By now it is Friday 5 p.m-.- . and it is date night so we, my too kind and loving wife, along with Jeff and Alisa Nielson go to Moab for dinner and the football game. I volunteer my two youngest kids, Nikki and Daniel, to babysit' Nielsons kids at their house. As I said before, everyone is suffering from bear mania so Daniel, the prankster, goes to the front porch, screams there is a bear and slams and locks the door. Nikki reluctantly checks it out, finds there is no R SUPPORT! , qqsjmbdcsb 1 1NTEREST FitencfyfoqprtancadLoan Offlcar -- Call Vana Young 435-587-21- 00 TODAYI |