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C4 — The Herald Journal Logan Utah Wednesday December 24 2003 SHERMANS LAGOON By David Germain AP Movie Writer i " “Cheaper by the Dozen” might be more : TileM fWi " J: feyituttPE WWO'SMNEO A CARD IT MS& ’sdMETHMr 50 THE SPECIAL lElXER: H9UDW : eacrecT'' THEIR computer TO WORK er movie was based on But the title and basic notion of a couple struggling to raise 12 children were the only things the studio and filmmakers figured they could profitably ram down audiences! throats THE KNOKCD ‘j ' appropriately titled “Cheerier by the Dozes” Other than the title this supposed remake bears virtually no resemblance to the admirable 1930s film or fuitobiographical memoir the ear-li- tt Movie review So gone is the touching authentic portrait of the joys and rigors of bringing up lots of i babies which the film starring Clifton Webb and Myma Lpy and the book by riblings Frank APPhoto ' ' B Gilbreth Jr and Ernestine Gilbreth Carey Tom Baker (Stave Martin) ishotori tail of a renav" tendered so well ' Century Fox’s “Cheaper By In its place we get Steve Martin as father of gade frog Twentieth ' Dozen”' The the brood bumbling through an increasingly puerile string of pratfalls and right gagsDirec- - Dozen” leaving Tom behind to keep the NOW HOW Shawn Levy applies the same lowbrow sen- - household tor COULD YOU SET together while he scrambles to : here as he did oh his previous flicks sibiliiy MAD AT A BOY squeeze in his gridiron duties “Just Married" and “Big Fat Liar” THAT CUTE? The oldest Baker siblings Nora Charlie and comic charm holds the Martin’s Lorraine — played by Piper Ferabo (“Coyote movie aloft for a while but “Cheaper by the Ugly”) Tom Welling (Clark Kent in TV’s Dozen” eventually drowns in schmaltz and “Smailjville”) and Hilaty Duff (’’Lizzie V ‘'inanity McGuire") — are too caught up hi their' own The book arid original movie were based on lives' to offer much help to dear old dad on the the Gilbreths’ childhood in the early 1900s : g duties among a family of 12 children who were sub-- " AQgr free inflict the Bakers leaves to ’ That younger wnuas?father’s rigid to their efficiency-expeject new much on as their neighborhood mayhem ' ' sense of pragmatism as imaginable with the audience paying the ') The new movie jettisons all of that trans- - V : Viv'v pricev : planting the story to contemporary times The movie is awash in nauseatingiy cute kids the father to a college football coach mischief much of it who Specialize in and altering the family name to Baker (you can directed at Nora’s bratty boyfriend almost hear the little hamster wheel turning in (’’Just Married” star Ashton Kutcher in an Some movie executive’s head on' the sequel uncredited role) “Cheaper by the Baker's Dozen") As grating as “Cheaper by the Dozen” is the After years toiling at a'small school Martin's moyie comes in the heart of the holidays when Tom Baker lands his dieam job as football even bad family flicks often find an audience coach at his alma mater in Chicago He and If the movie can rake in SlO millioh a head wife Kate (Bonnie Hunt) uproot their reluctant for each of the Bakerchildren the studio will ''' passel of children who squawk and moan at consider it a fine return on its cheap invest- -' ' leaving behind the only home they’ve ever ' ment! known! : “Cheaper by the Dozen" a 20th Century The family Soon faces domestic crises as ' Fox release is rated PG for language and some Kate leaves for a publicity tour to promote her thematic elements Running time: 98 minutes : book naturally called “Cheaper by the ' One and a half stars out of four - - BEETLE BAILEY: YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO IT'S SOMETHING THOUGHT YOU COULD )( &CT ME A PRESENT MRS BAILEY I i ever-affab- le : : - : 'child-rearin- ' - H AGAR THE HORRIBLE rt con-verti- A self-absorb- ed : Ii '' PEANUTS COMES 4 - ‘ AND WHAT HAPPENS WHEN SANTA CLAUS -- - Shoshone Wail ID A FILL YOUR novel by David J Hawkes STOCKING? ' A tV - IV'XUI MOTHER GOOSE AND GRIMM ’nSOORNEii slowly to Sarah The crackling of the fire the warmth of a wool blanket the smells of food arid coffee: It seeiried good to just lie here and relax She felt so tired and weak She would rest for just a few more minutes: Foodl Blan- kets! With a weak gasp Sarah opened her eyes inride and tried to sit up Glancing around-thof the small shelter she couldn’t at first repiember where she was Then recollection: i the river crossing the fever and sickness “Good morning iria’am Welcome back' to the land of the living” There in front of her was a tall young man! A ragged suntanned face dark hair and a scar ran down from the ' hair line to the :comer Of his left eye but a bright smile ari4 ri hint of humor in the gray wishing a large helping onto a tin plrie Moroni gave this to Sairn “Here you go Eat thi£ and you’ll feel better” J: Slowly mid with care the lad began to eat After making sure Sam was' all right Moroni ' filled a cup1 with broth from the pot of beans and began to feed it to the rick woman Some ' she spifbackiip but Moroni hoped that she would gain some strength Finished lie looked at SamThe boy had eaten his supper and now ' his eyelids were drooping i “Here” Moroni said gently “Lie down fiere by yoiir ma arid get some' rest I’ll watch' the ' fire"::--Sam let Moroni tuck him urider a corner of the concern that was building in V'eyes ' the blanket next to his mother and was sqori Sarah-dispelled asleep Looking over at the sleeping pair “Who are you? Where 'is my son?” Sarah' Moroni lei a smile play across his face What asked'-'' ' have I got myself into her thought? Picking up “Sam? He's down by the river trying to catch the pot of beans to' eat Finishing die another trout He's proved to be a fine provider beans and elk he Quietly slipped out of the these few days” Moroni answered with a past shelter and walked down to the river There he : rinsed out the pot and refilled it with dean grin :: “Days?T Sarah questioned water After checking the horses he went into' Then noticing the' dark 'blue shirt the the- shelter and nudged the pot next to the fire wore and the black slouch hat with the ' stranger Throwing a handful of coffee into the pot he light blue cord she asked 4Are ypu with the built up the fire and' wrapped himself in his '! :Army?Who are yoii7" V coat ' heavy ma’am I’m not In the Army anymore '“No ' “Looks as' if I have a purpose now” he said and iriy name is Moroni Stewart I was just to himself He wondered what old softly traveling south when I stumbled onto your son ' ' Sergeant O’Toole would say at this new Liicky l did—you were pretty sick” Turning his attention to the crackling ' coffee Moroni was See tomorrow’s Herald Journal for the next Installment fire arid the " soon lost in his thoughts! Awareness came of this story “ : - f'vX : ' ' FOX TROT - : THAT UH-O- sounded uke " ’ THlSlS WHV NEVES SHAKE MX I SoMETHMO WOKE v '''OWN-- ' : ' ' : : C chal-len- ge now-bubbli- REAL liFE ADVENTURES fi CLOSE TO HOME -- Win of bridge By Phillip Alder t : ! Experienced bridge experts' know the common suit combi-natioBut occasionally they v are faced with a rare situation ' Then even the best can make ai'mistake Cover the' East-We- st hands in the dia- gram First imagine you are !L North With the opponents retaining a respectful silence you open one diamond and partner responds one spade What would you rebid? ' Now move info South’s Mat-Yoreach four spades by the given auction West leads the diamond nine How would you plan the play ? Rebidding one witha ringlikon is acceptable if (rite’s short suits are strong Here though North with ' rs of his poirits in his long suits should have rebid two clubs Then proba- - c j 4 - if no-tru- If you ballava hard anough wonderful thhiga happea Somatbrias " Frantic the! the gilts she ordered would not arrive In time tor Chrtstmae Carol mates a three-quarte- ' V h would have produces an overbly reached the'Jaydbwn three no- - ' trick here but works against all 2 breaks as long as East trump However' when North '' South rebid one i has the' ace ' insistedon spadesastramps CNBL2003 Declarer one of the best ' ' North " card pliers on the planet won the fust trick with his ' Q 4 2 Q io 6 5 2 diamond rice and led a spade : t‘ A t: ' 'to dummy’s jack East won - Barit with die queen arid returned a : West-14 ID 6 2 4'AJ9 diamond Then'wheii East 'J J : i 410 9 8 the round next won of trumps 9 J74 he gave West a diamond ruff Q 0 9 7 5 J64 So the defendersscored four ' tricks! tramp 4 9 K 9 Stnith could have survived V by discarding his third dia-4 AKI mond on dummy’s second top j club He returns to hand and Dealer West exits with a tramp Then he Vulnerable: Both raffs East’s diamond continuaNorth tion with the spade king and : 1 leads another tramp 1 NT Paso 14 But it is correct for South to : 4 4 Pass' Pass win Irick one in die dummy and play the spade jack to his Opening lead:1 9 king-'Thi- s North-Sout- ns atV 'r'V' 'fjsim-- 4-- no-tru- 4 ' 4-J- ' - " ' : 7-- : i '" |