Show 1 Get dirty cn V A ost people make res-- — I olutions on New I I Year's Day I make Q them the day after I file taxes I always vow to get organized X3 and dean up that compost E heap on my desk This year I SLIGHTLY 0) have finally mustered the OFF CENTER g courage tojust give up: I'm O not going to' get organized Dennis “Cleanliness is next to god- -' — liness?” I know for certain Hinkamp Bible and in £ this isn't in thethe 3 my dictionary two words ' cleanliness trying to trample ' Q are exactly 201 pages apart the spirit of those of us not so Neat people have been ' inclined 2 using this tired inaccurate me better or after Repeat ® quote to become insufferably tell this to that spud go yet uppity Whomever you' live you live with: '‘Cleanliness is chil- jC with be it your spouse no where near godliness dren parents or domesticated Godliness is on the planet ' domestic partner the cleaner Pluto and cleanliness is barely the takes ' high Oj person always backing out of your drive- CD moral plateau They do so way” with only slightly less martyrA little dirt is safe A little dom than Gandhi fasting for dirt is environmentally friend- peace ly You too can make slovenli- The purveyors of sparkling ness work to your advantage toilet bowls lemon fresh Your Home: A neat yard is ovens see yourself shine din- too inviting A spotless yard netware pine scented closets invites all sorts of magazines stripped and waxed floors 'areselling doctrine arguing folks taking over Those demanding to walk right up and knock on ' that everything be folded neatyour door Who needs that? It ly and put away organized also lends itself to that afflu- Rubber-Maidesorted and d at look that is inviting to bur- ent every opportunity are the glars armies of goose-steppiBy leaving lumber tools V b I 2 - - ng Center USU All 730 pm students others $5 OmUIHmiy COMPELUNGANDTOUCHNG' ments tastefully scattered around you can always give the impression that somebody is home Crooks are going to think “How come that guy has a chain saw and two axes sitting out there when there are no trees in his yard? Maybe he's a little too crazy for us Maybe we'll just try the house with the impeccable landscape room 224 (hast Tickets available only MOKmwVW 'THEBE5TFUAJ0R1HEDBGU5SI0N OF SEFXXJS pH free with Some plays valid contain themes andor OVER A DECADE' Scott Foundu 'AMADNG EMOTIONAL MOMENT ’ NO MAT7BI WHAT CLOTH YOU JUS CUT FROM' Stum Site Tfwifatif ' ID ISSUES D DodyVoricty Fine Arts at the door WHODUMUWmj rmyivoou mtponm 5 USU MOMNGNmYOIAFm ) GENUNE SURPRISES' DougWright mg Your Can Dirt is a cheap burglar alarm Make your car the least attractive one on the lot and it is less likely to be stolen I don't fix dings and small dents I don't wash my car and I keep a healthy col- lection of spent 7-food paraphernalia strewn within my car: Sure someone might CONTINUED on 1 1 23-2- UUmHtotnlKAZ 1 'MAJOR LEAGU-E- bicycles and garden imple- - T -- taOffinM 9riM language that may be offensive to some audience members torn WANTSTOBE-GREAT- MMiMtyar April on the Studio Stage WHffRBtYHOUYWOODMOME THEFBMBmONOF INEMURDBIMYSTERYGENRr ' rrwtwr "ENGROSSERS CRACKERIACK MURDER MYSTERY' Som F Hum SattlokoWbuM 'COMPELLIN-GENORMOUSLY CATHARTIC' --Bobul Kilby SoltUkoWbuni |