Show I ' The Herald Journal Logan Utah Tuesday April 3 2001 —Page 15 t I FOR BETTER OR WORSE Affair ended friendship By Ann Landers Creators Syndicate : ents She has told me she will return any cards or gifts they send in the future and refuse to take their phone calls How should we handle this? My husband thinks we should confront then! but they are sure to pretend innocence and act insulted — which could create even more problems We are waiting until we hear from you before' we do anything Don’t let us down Ann — Anxious 'in California DEAR ANXIOUS: I cannot imagine grandparents being so insensitive Do nothing for the time being Let the situation cool off After a month or so suggest that the grandparents send a small gift along with a note apologizing for their insensitivity Meanwhile do what you can to heal the breach Tell Bonnie “Your grandparents always had a weird sense of humor Try to forgive them” DEAR ANN LANDERS: My wife is a compulsive shopper from hell She owns dozens of handbags she has never carried and shoes she has never worn Many of her blouses and skirts still have the price tags on them Still she is in the stores almost every day doing more shop- Inc DEAR ANN LANDERS: I’m a married woman who slept with my friend’s husband We didn’t mean to cheat but once it happened the affair continued for several months before we decided to' end it I told my husband and he was wonderful He forgave me and said we should “move ahead" The problem is my friend I'm pretty sure die has no idea about the affair but lately she has been treating me like pond scum She says our different lifestyles make it impossible for us to be close anymore I work full time and die is a mother She insists she makes her husband happier this way but I know for a fact that her husband is plenty miserable and he doesn't exactly hide it If he hadn’t slept with me it would have been with somebody else I feel bad that my friend is going through life thinking she's with a man who is happy and loyal when that’s hardly the case Should I tell her about our affair and clear the air? Please advise me — Wondering in New York DEAR NY: If your friend is treating you Mlike pond scum” you can bet your bottom dollar she already knows that you slept with her husband You have done enough damage Clean up your act and move on That “friendship” is stay-at-ho- - MENT IS THE HOPE I'M EMPOWERED TO MAKE THAT THE OTHER TOTALLY WORTHLESS ONE? PRIORITY? HOPE I THE TOTALLY WORTHLESS ONE OR HIGHEST A IS DOUBLE-EDGE- SWORO DECISION V Is this an illness? Is there a cure for it? What can I do? — Newark NJ DEAR NEWARK: Believe it or hot studies are currently being done With an sant drug to help compulsive shoppers overcome their impulsive behavior and depression The results so far are very positive I will not however mention the name of the drug in my column Check it out with your physician or psychiatrist' anti-depre- DEAR ANN LANDERS My daughter just turned 17 Her grandparents sent her a very insulting birthday card picturing an overweight “birthday girl” Inside was a punch line about gaining weight “Bonnie” Is NOT overweight but teenagers are so sensitive to remarks about their appearance that I was appalled by my inlaws' thoughtlessness This isn’t the first time they have behaved this way My have never been fond of me and have said and done hurtful things over the years IJiave put up with it for 20 years but 1 refuse to allow them to do this to Bonnie She was so upset by the card that she no longer wants to have anything to do with her grandpar ARLOANDJANIS s- What’s the truth about pot cocaine LSD n PCP crack speed and downers? “The informaon Dope” has tion on drugs Send a long business-siz- e envelope and a check or money order for $373 (this includes postage and handling) to: Lowdown do Ann Landers PO Box 2 11362 Chicago 111 (In Canada send $455) To find out more about Ann Landers and read her past columns visit the Creators Syndicate web page at wwwcreatorscom ANN LANDERS (R) COPYRIGHT 2001 Low-dow- self-address- ed in-la- - IS IT WHICH ASSIGN- ping- over - DILBERT GRIZZWELLS 60611-QS6- CREATORS SYNDICATE excuse WE ywwwvBUCb?T gA — l“l INC Blood in urine needs attention Peter H Gott MD ' Newspaper Enterprise Association DEAR DR GOTT: I was surprised at your' response in a recent column entitled “Celibacy Won’t Hurt You” I agree that celibacy does not affect health but for you to say that some people need regular and frequent release is just plain ridiculous I’m no doctor but I know that sex is not a basic NEED it is a basic function Please get your ‘ factsstmighthefore you present an opinion' r1' DEAR READER: ITn sorty to agree Avlth you bUt sexbaf release is I’m afraid a need not merely a function It is for most people as important a physiological require- ment as eating drinking and sleeping- In most instances this is due to stimulation — in both men and women — by testosterone a powerful hormone Thus sexual cravings diminish of disappear when testosterone production is shut off as it is with age certain operations many medications ' and ill health Those people who fail to recognize such biological sexual urges are doomed to misunderstand one of humankind’s most compelling metabolic mandates DEAR DR GOTT: I have chronic fatigue ' syndrome that is associated with muscle pain bowel irregularities allergic symptoms and jaw pain Are these symptoms somehow related? DEAR READER: In a recent study researchers discovered that patients with chron-- : ic fatigue syndrome had a higher rate of other physical conditions including fibromyalgia irritable bowel syndrome multiple chemical sensitivities chronic pelvic pain and temporomandibular joint pain The reasons for this are a mystery but may be due to “complex interactions of biological ' psychological and environmental factors” of the according to Leslie Aaron a : 2001 the in issue of the study reported January Journal of Internal Medicine Until the cause(s) of chronic fatigue syndrome can be identified: ' thiese findings are difficult to interpret Howev- -' er in your case the symptoms are probably' By DEAR DR GOTT: About four years ago I passed blood in my urine This has continued despite the use of antibiotics Two kidney tests and a cystoscopy ' were normal however I continued to have a uri--' nary infection My gyne- cologist is art concerned DEAR READER: Well I would be Persisting or recurring urinary lead tract infections-cato serious consequences including pyelonephritis (kidney infection) First your doctors need to test your urine to discover whether the bacteria are resistant to the customary therapy Repeated urine cultures will be necessary If the microorganisms are ' resistant the tests will indicate which more powerful antibiotics will cure the infection If on the other hand the blood in your urie reflects repeated infections the doctors need to discover why Recurring cystitis (bladder infec- tion) in women can be related to intercourse-Takincertain steps such as voiding after relations may solve the problem In the event that you have investigated these i possibilities I urge you to seek a further con- sultation with a urologist In my opinion you should have another cystoscopy during which the specialist cultures urine coming from each kidney In this way the source of infection can ‘ be identified and treated Don't delay Blood in the urine although not necessarily a serious health problem is always cause for concern To give you related information I am sending you a copy of my Health Report “Kidney Dis-orders” Other readers who would like a copy should send $2 plus a long stamped envelope to PO Box 2017 Murray ' Hill Station New York NY 10136 Be sure to X-r- ay : have-to-dis- - - - zrrs GARFIELD ALLEY OOP or self-address- ed related' mention the title' Crossword V April 3 2001 ACROSS : l 54 antelope 33 Ohio cK Biblical plant 34 7 Song book 13 Geographer Bowman 14 Not susceptible to disease 15 Small shelter 16 Firmed :i7 Hockey great i Hobby— 18 Also 20 SFOinfo 21 Defeat decisively 15 Neatest 28 Put forth ppam flou reserve 35 36 Mediter- ' coin Lingers The girl Feel poorly Karlovy Vary for one 48 Hyatt : holdings ' root to Previous tails an TtuToMj-nPvugP- jMIE n q asie NIQlVIODQIPIOi ELAINE iENSjER IN WOW A - vHW On AT thnK - V City in Hawaii River in Belgium German ate Offense ' Type of bran Pictures Discover suddenly lAlsiTlOt ’ 4--- ? 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