Show C4 — The Herald Journal Logan Utah Wednesday April 16 2003 SHERMANS LAGOON HUY HMHORNt 1 ) IH0U6HT YOUR HEALTH CLUB HAP Ml NUN Of ATE- of-m-- equipment THU TREAPNILL PQEW7 ‘(MBeftprioiiatf RJoimllt’ PROBABLY S0HETHIN6 TECHNICAL THESE FANCY NUN MACHINES ARC J00 COHPUCATEP has nothing to offer XlrJUOUT By David Germain AP Movie Writer “Bulletproof Monk” possesses aterrific title for an action flick and the serene poise of Chow not much else The movie wastes the cool premise of an ageless Buddhist ascetic charged with protecting a holy scroll of ultimate power sputtering through a string of fight sequences involving cardboard villains scenes are all clutter and The martial-art- s chaos as rapid-fir- e editing obscures die action (Given the clunky quick cuts is it any surprise ‘ Yun-FaLA- nd THE 'J00 CUP K COffEE MM NO PLACE M WV post dk-- d f buo&et ! WHEN I THINK AMT X THE CAJLD IWE SMED COULD HAVE NEST BUILT NHL NEVER &X I AMIN BUM) 340 ON A CUP Of COFFEE !ff — Movie review that director Paul Hunter makes his feature-fil- m debut after a career in music videos and AP Photo The Monk (Chow helps Kar (Seann William Scott) hone hie fighting skills in MGM d Pictures “Bulletproof Monk' Yun-Fa- t) commercials?) Seann William Scott and Jaime charisma either for die genre little have King or with each other as romantic leads Best known as a comic meathead from the “American Pie” movies Scott is utterly miscast endlessly trotting out a bad imitation of a Harrison Ford smirk to show he has the wiseguy chops to play an action hero As a mysterious street chick King is stilted and boring If Mattel decided to market Bad Giri Barbie King could be spokesmodel The movie opens with a 1943 prologue at a Tibetan monastery where a monk (Chow) concludes his training to become protector of the scroll taking on his mentor’s supernatural powers that will keep him young able and bulletproof for the next 60 years He also gives up his name a needless twist that makes him the “monk with no name” But since comrades and villains subsequently refer to him as “Monk" that label has become his surrogate name Moments after the monk graduates the monastery is attacked by Nazis led by SS commander Struker who has somehow learned that anyone who reads the scroll will gain limitless power The monk miraculously escapes with the scroll and turns up 60 years Ijter in urban America where he encounters Kar (Scott) a resourceful but aimless pickpocket who has taught himself martial arts by mimicking films at a kung fu moviehouse where he’s the projec- Co-sta-rs BEETLE BAILEY HAGAR THE HORRIBLE uxE&Y'etrr7ti& n me WNK&lEt TO&toViOFF HB 6EWN6 v GONE TOO fax! SKILL- S- WHAT PEANUTS action-packe- tionist Odd little portents reveal to the monk that Kar may be his successor as keeper of the scroll babe The two soon joined by martial-art- s Jade (King) are tossed into a slapdash succession of battles and chases with bad guys led by the Struker who needs the scroll to make Mm young and Nazi-lik- e again Screenwriters Ethan Reiff and Cyrus Voris comicadapting the movie from a three-pa- rt book series try to imbue the story with culture-clas- h humor and camaraderie But the monk his new allies and their adversaries make for a generally dreary bunch of now-geriatr- ic - heroes and villains Chow’s bemused regal stillness provides some mileage but he’s in low-remode comwarrior the to noble he played pared tragically nt in “Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon” or the vibrant battlers from his John Woo-direct- ed Hong Kong flicks Like Kar and Jade Struker and his blackhearted granddaughter Nina (Victoria Smurfit) are just dull Their one seeming talent is inexplicably turning up with their henchmen wherever the monk goes only to let him slip through their fingers “Bulletproof Monk” an MGM release is rated PG-1- 3 for violence language and some sexual content One and a half stars out of four Sons of Bear Lake Z A novel by Douglas D Alder -- arriet took special care of Grandpa Ridges during the final painfuldays of his life The last month he was completely bedridden and had to depend on Harriet totally He always tried to express his gratitude in his raspy whispers His last breath was labored and painful but he took it in his beloved Round Valley Harriet felt fulfilled that she had played a part in assuring his comfort during his concluding years Such satisfaction eluded her in dealing with Peter She had been careful not to pre-emHank not to nag or domioate Peter It was going well until Peter entered high school Her strategy was to win with love but from the first day of high school Peter began to talk down Bear Lake and Round Valley He refused to tell Harriet where he had been upon returning late in the evenings insisting on “Independence above all else” It was a confrontation that lasted two years Harriet hoped Hank’s assessment was right: “Hold on to the reins but not too tight It will MOTHER GOOSE AND GRIMM pt FOX TROT pass” Finally after one of Peter’s suspended absences they received a letter from him — postmarked Fort Ord California They were stunned It crushed them It capped two weeks of anxiety Win HEAL LIFE ADVENTURES CLOSE TO HOME hands in The North-Sout- h : today’s deal were used by a fellow columnist Given that the trumps are breaking 2-- 2 how would you plan the play in four spades after West has led the heart jack? That North hand is strong ' for a limit raise but a tad g raise weak for a (made here with a conventiongame-forcin- After a day of having a turfleneck rub on one’s brain stem one becomes unstable Rather than spend hours waiting In Una Bruce e Inflatable dummy relied on his Eave-A-Ptac- v body president of North Rich High next year Sure it was the state’s smallest high school but he was an electric personality a bom leader a dashing figure who drew people to him everywhere He was Hank’s son in that he ranged free! but he was not like him in feelings of inadequacy Just the opposite No he had no need to run For that matter neither did Hank Maybe Hank was more like Peter than even he admit- ted See tomorrow's Herald Journal for the next instaH-- 1 ment of this story at bridge By Phillip Alder al response) The best bid is something like 363 spades but few opponents let one get away with that The original columnist recommended winning the first trick with dummy’s heart ace drawing trumps ending in hand and leading a low' diamond toward dummy’s jack This establishes a diamond trick for a subsequent club discard if West has the dia three-no-tru- ' During that painful fortnight Hank had tried to maintain that Peter was just going through a normal stage of adolescence He restrained himself from repeating that in Wyoming he had run away regularly in his early teens and per-manently by sixteen That would almost suggest Peter was overdue at seventeen Obviously such talk would be counterproductive for the other boys Hank knew that He was churning inside more than he admitted He knew of Harriet’s dogged resolution to contain Peter’s aggressive personality within the bonds of gospel living And he knew times were different This was not the Great Depression Peter had no need to escape a defi-cient family He wasn’t Razzle Thompson wandering on the edge of society Peter was a dynamo elected to be student mond queen or East holds the diamond ace Fair enough but his closing sentence was: “The suggested method of play fails only when East has the (diamond) queen and West the ace — which will occur in about one deal out of four — but in that case any other method of play is also virtually certain to fail” Hmih How about ducking the fust trick? Suppose West continues with another heart You win with dummy’s ace ruff a heart high in hand draw trumps ending in the dummy niff the last heart and exit with three rounds of clubs If West wins the trick he is endplayed forced either to lead a diamond around to your king or to concede a I’m not saying this is a better line but it is the way to succeed with the given layout C2003 NEA North A ¥ J trick and shifts to a low diamond you have to guess the position a 4 A K9 West ¥ 52 A ¥ 10 9 5 A 9 8 2 J 5 East 1 ( 6 3 A A Q 10 7 8 4 2 South 4 K Q J 10 4 A A 6 3 ¥82 K 7 3 Dealer South Vulnerable: South 14 4 If East wins the third club A 9 8 7 A 7 6 3 4 ' West Pass Pass East-We- st North 3 NT Pass Opening lead: ¥J East Past Pass |