Show was onto H m ernestine yes indeed pa in the parlor two or three times and caught jack on hia knees proposing jack stammered out that he was hunt ing for a collar button edna does he still work that game ernestine no papa leaves a rard of collar buttons on the table each night now an excellent idea girls who want to go in for altera ture he said should take up the real school of fiction yoi think soa oh es indeed and then they should write domestic stories that deal with the home but because it would do them a lot of good to get the necessary experience she am I 1 the first girl you ever PROOF kissed he do you I 1 am acting like a beginner 9 neglected her for papa bea pitiful ernestine was sobbing as though her heart would break what Is it deara asked the girl friend W why she sobbed 11 told jack after he proposed to go up and see papa V hat of thata why they started playing cards and now ho goes up ta see papa every night stray stories effectual mrs is determined that her daughter shall not marry young so she decided to discourage any at tensions tent ions from young men D t she find it difficulty 7 no she managed it easily by hav ing her taught to discuss browning and play the violin washington star something the matter chauffeur who used to be a groom sorry sir but we can t take out the sorrel automobile this morning his master can t eha well the matter with ita chauffeur the left hand tire Is winded and there s a spavin on the right tore wheel sounds all R of course the whole Is greater than any of its parts I 1 don t know about that you dont perhaps you can tell me of a cage where the whole of any thing is less than the thing itself certainly Certai nl the hole of a porous plaster plenty of poor stuff but do you think asked the visit or in the local option town that pro hibi tion really prevents 7 well replied the native it pre vents a fellow from getting the best of whisky but it doean doesn t prevent the whisky from getting the best of him preferences we never get precisely what we want in this life said the pher right answered the cynic a lot of towns through the country are getting libraries when they would rather have the cash sure to be a one she is going to organize a new society of international scope that she says will be the largest in exist ence what Is she going to call ita the daughters of the south amer lean revolutions referred Hefe to our dumb animals why dont you try to drive that mule without profanity 7 it wouldn t do any good answered the canal boatman it ain t fair to the mule to ask it to start in at its time life to learn a whole lot polite synonyms fam liar instance tommy asked tha teacher what do you understand by the word created to make out of nothing give me an example my sister creates a pompadour ev ery morning anything but hard it s nonsense to say the way of the transgressor is hard remarked the man who had been taken in by an oily swindler yesa yes his way is usually suave t dian didn t want that sort of pay I 1 have nothing but my heart to give you said a spinster to a lawyer who had concluded a suit for her well said the lawyer gruffly go so my clerk he takes the tees proof posit ve 1 I wonder it anere were any actors n ancient queried the matinee kill sure thing rejoined the cheerful idiot doean doesn t the good book tell us there was a ham in the ark would assist mr P pad er of chicago it s been suggested that I 1 give a chair to inq of he universities mrs P packer may I 1 select it when you re A ng D fforence im a little in doubt said the dac tor your trouble Is either one ot two things what are asked the pa tient appendicitis or the stomach ache however we can settle that howa by cutting you open of course solved at last the cabbage how are you feeling old chapa the egg oh I 1 m quite strong but I 1 m not feeling very good the being the case suppose we visit the theater to nighta and that gitle g itle reader is what led up to their going on the stage qu te another plan A day said the sheriff has ceas ed to be twenty four hours and now is only from sunrise to sunset I 1 wish you could get em to figure it that way at the penitentiary re marked the man who had just been sentenced it would shorten my term quite a bit the point of view who goes a borrowing goes asor rowing remarked the chronic brov erb possibly rejoined the student of human nature but the sorrowing sn t to be compared with that of the individual who goes alend trying to place it I 1 d like to see that young japa nese prince A japanese princea where Is hea oh hes traveling incognito Is hea im so dreadfully weak about geography names up near manchuria isn t ita booming business that lobbyist seems to have a good deal of money to spend remarked the first councilman yes replied the other he s work ing for an ordinance to allow automobiles unlimited speed ah in the interest of the auto cluba no the undertakers trust about the size of one Is that a chicken 9 asked the boarder dismally of course replied the landlady what did you think it wasa A canary answered the boarder as he counted the number of people to be served and made a mental calca latton as to the size of the slice that he might expect would make trouble money talks said the rich man oh no it was the reply and it s a mighty good thing that it doean doesn t too why because it it did it might be put on the witness stand to the great biscom fidure of some of the people who have it leap year he what do you think of a girl who will take advantage of leap year to proposed propose 9 she I 1 think the girl who has to wait for leap year isn t very smart he but men do the proposing in other years she they think they do boston transcript stamps ten 2 cent stamps you asked for madam said the clerk and there they are but where are the she de banded what others the trading stamps I 1 get them everywhere I 1 deal philadelphia ledger A better scheme the young clergyman was under the impression that there had been some criticism because he prea bed extemporaneously do you think I 1 ought to write my sermons he asked no replied the sarcastic deacon I 1 think you ought to buy them somewhat of a drawback mrs Haus keep delia I 1 dont want you to be entertaining that policeman in the kitchen any more bejia but miss edith Is in the par lor most av the maam an 01 don t think mr 0 flynn would benj her society her bein strange to him patriotic so you submitted a poem to the great editors interrogated pearl I 1 suppose you tied it with a blue rib bona no I 1 used red white and blue replied edith it was called our flag her retort A penny for your thoughts he said oh they re not worth it she re piled I 1 was thinking of you lady of the house martha OBEDIENT I 1 told you an hour ago to turn on the gas in the dining room martha yas em an I 1 did it too cant you smell it important clew shay began the belated citizen I 1 hie want you t shee me home you hie know where my housh Is don t you let me see mused the policeman what s the name of your cook A fallacy what I 1 say Is true besides seeing Is believing you know oh not always no no I 1 see you tor instance it all depends hyker what would you do it sonie fellow were to call you a tool byker well it all depends it I 1 owed the fellow money id probably punch his head but it he owed me I 1 d laugh it off as a good joke A new order you don t mean to say you girls have started a secret society yes it s a society whose members pledge themselves to tell all the se crets they know the reason I 1 have bet a silk hat with that five times in the last year and he baa never paid one of them that so I 1 d t know he was in the habit of breaking his word oh he isn t he won the bets she thought so too little brother do you know ma bel I 1 believe it I 1 t here captain spooner would kiss you leave the room this minute you impertinent little boy punch surely he would don quixote would have a hard urns it he lived now how so why bet bed have to get a card in the windmill tilters union before he could do business no doubt it frankly I 1 think the stage Is degenerating are you still on it yes then I 1 guess it is |