Show FRONT PAGE IN RED YELLOW AND GREEN WITH WOOD TYPE FOUR INCHES HIGH the beautiful story of imogene con stance or how hans won in an ua equal battle tor the goods A true story imogene constance was the beautiful but haughty daughter 0 a agoo alderman hans was only a poor boy with a stone bruise ills father was a human elevator on a brick building merely carrying brick up a seven story ladder to a man at the top who did all the work hans mother was a good woman but because she ate custard a fork and dian didn t know which knife for the fish she wis w is refused the society entre and spent most of her time at home chas ing under breeches and lace thin gama jigs up and down a dilapidated old washboard it hans despite the hod and the custard loved the proud imogene she was the sylvia of his boyish dreams the hero of his leander the queen of his arcady and because love hopes where reason doth despair he dared to picture her as his all his some sweet day in the florl ous untried future and then one beautiful afternoon in autumn when the chipmunks were busy in the hazel bruh and the low rumbling of the coal wagon was once more heard in the land hans saved imogene a life catching a pursuing gentleman HANS ow by the tall he hun on until taft bull ran himself to death in flight at this sudden attachment to bis caudal appendage it was at this juncture that imogene was bundled off to boardl rg school while hans with grief in his heart was set at work as an understudy to a garbie collector in the ninety seventh ward a 1 at the close of a tedious week of oa travail and trouble hans was discard ing bis last load at the city dump when in the quasi darkness of the eventide there suddenly burst from the heap at his feet a dazzling light so great was the illumination that the shadows about the dump were entirely dispelled and over a block away could be seen the widow Flan ahans cow stable looming up like a tur feted castle in a stage tableau gasping with surprise hans glanced down at horrors he could see the very bones through his great thick calf skin shoes and when he felt ol 01 the shoes in the scintillating light the bones in his fingers were likewise visible but hans was no coward and grabbing up the huge lump 0 light he p it it in a garbage can and lashed his jaded horses to the nearest drug store As he appeared on the boulevard the electric lights became mere lightning bugs and the darkness was die polled as it by magic great crowds of people noting the fireworks gath ered about and clamored tor an ex plan atlon A horse doctor passing that way took one blinking look into the garbage can and shouted it was indeed so and it weighed f seven pounds that night hans locked his treasure in the henhouse and the hens thinking a new day had arrived got up and bayed another egg all round er that Is almost round the nest day however liana sold three fourths ot a pound ot radium for 07 and put the other six and a quarter pounds away for a rainy day the rest was easy he bought some store clothes and a plug bat that squatted when he went to the theater and called on my lady inogene de ing leap year she met him with a halt nelson and they lived happily ever afterward moral many a fortune has been carelessly thrown into the garbage A well known monthly magazine illustrating what a great world thia 1 says a man lived in the next room to his wife and dian didn t know she bad twins until he read it in the newspapers it Is presumed that he has since stopped his paper war Is H jap scrap muscovite husky fight W too much pleasure alojs who will question the divine wisdom that gives us only enough sorrow to enhance our happiness wit only the weak despair the strong set their iron jaws and push forward counting only the victories tk conscience Is too often the mere butler in a home of policy u one may lose one s own sorrow helping another forget his I 1 a ie only ir selves undisciplined cip lined |