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Show THE DIXIE OWL ner year for the Dixie. In primitive times the men put powder in their guns and went out to hunt the deer, now the ladies put powder on their faces and go out to hunt the men. Evidently some of the boys in school are tired of modern life and long for the primitive. At least they turned up missing in their classes for several days and when they returned they were picking their teeth with deer bones. President Nicholes took a flying trip to Salt Lake to attend conference. He returned bubbling over with enthusiasm and weighted down with a new sense of responsibility. We were glad to see him back for its like sitting down to breakfast with mother gone, to go to Devotional and find Mr. Nicholes not there. The first Student body program was given Friday October, 22. It was an excellent program, the main feature being a talk by President Henry J. Miles, on the Essentials of Success. Our attorneys, Miles & Miles, have not yet had an opportunity to demonstrate their ability as there have been but three cases up in court and all pleas have been guilty. If fines continue to come in as they have this week our Student Body financial troubles will soon be over. There was a fair damsel named Lou Who is feeling exceedingly blue She cast in her net Young Crawford to get But darn it, he filtered rigid through. Mr. Paxman: My wife and I are one, yet faith I know not why Sir. Mr. Tanner: Youre ten if I speak true ; shes one and youre a cipher. Fun & Philosophy Mr. Nicholes, opening the office door, announced, Im here. Nina: Fine, I was just looking for a brain wave. Excuse me if I quit talking for a minute. Crawford Houston. Wyatt Miles (in court) pointing to Merrill Sandberg with his pencil, Theres a great villian at the end of my pencil. Merrill: At which end, Your Highness? Mr. McAllister: Miss Webb, do you snore in your sleep? LaVerna: Ive never lain awake long enough to find out. advise you, girls, when dashing young fellows make love to you, never to believe that they really love you until they prove it by committing on suicide your account. I con-clusive- lv Henry Miles. Why does B stand before C? Because a Man must B before he can C. swims may say he has swum, But milk is skimmed and never skum, And nails you trim they are not A boy who trum. When words you speaK, tnesc words are spoken, But a nose is tweaked and cant be twoken, And what you seek is never sok en. If we forget then weve forgotten, But things we wet are never wotten, And houses let are never lotten. Boys, said professor Tanner, when I am endeavoring to show to you the peculiarities of the monkey I want you to look straight at me. Carl Larson, Chief of Police, was called upon to serve an attachment on Anna Miles, who had been talking in the study-room- . Anna, I have an attachment for you. Anna: (blushed) Your at tachment is reciprocated. Carl: You dont understand me, you must proceed to court. I know it is leap year Anna : but Id rather have you do the courting. Carl: Anna, this is no time for trifling; the justice is waiting. The justice, Oh Id Anna: a prefer parson. Clear as Mud Twas midnight on the ocean Not a street car was in sight The sun and moon shone brightly While it rained all day that night For in that summer snow storm A bare-foboy with shoes on Stood sitting in the grass. ot Mr. Reid while in Missouri was troubled a great deal by cockroaches which infested his bedroom. On mentioning the matter to his landlady, she answered indignantly, Sir, we havent a single one in the house. I know it, answered Mr. Reid, they are all married and have large families. We should never remembe: the benefits we have conferred nor forget the favors received. fihe earth is frequently designated as she because no man knows the age thereof. Oh how sweet, yet how bitter To love a girl and then not get her. Never fool with a fool, might fool you. he The best thing about a woman is a mans arm. Thinking is far from knowing. |