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Show THE DIXIE OWL Hoots From Owl Get my hand Some poor fellow bag- at once. says in a dying voice that he cannot live without me. Do hand me that Camilla, phone papa, thats Mr. Wanlass Dr. Woodbury, - talking. Number please? Mr. Romney, Brother Morris, tell us your definition of a hypocrite. A student who goes Elson, into Brother Woodwards Ethics class with a smile on his face. Paul Gray found Gourley with his coat off standing on the doorstep the other night and remarked: Suffering cats! man, you will catch an awful cold out here in your shirt sleeves. Thats what want, said Gourley cheerIve got to sing a base fully. 1 solo in the minstrel show. Mr. Wanlass, in Psychology class to Frank Nelson. Now Frank this afternoons experiments show us conclusively that you are not able to distinguish the complexion of a person by their voice. Well, Ill have to adFrank, mit that, but I can tell a pretty In selecting a partner for life take the advice of a bald headed philosopher and choose one of the opposite sex. It dont make much difference which one. Beers Loos. From an anxious mother Hello, Doc. is that you? Well Lizzie has been sick again, I am afraid she is going to have nervous postulation (prostration) shall I give her another epidemic (hyperdemic)? thing that indicates insensibility and sleep. Mr. Tanner, Give an exam- ple. Rowena, Your reading. girl from an ugly one. What, about Verda Willard, Bastian? Frank, Poor girl! I wouldnt want to say. Vernon do you know what I want, to become? Vernon, Why I know what I would like you to become a member of the Church. Schuyler (looking at a muddob-bar- s nest) Look at that wonderful work of nature. Annie G., That isnt natures In the kitchen. Iloscoe: Miss Ward should a gentleman place his napkin under his chin or on his vest? work, nest. thats a muddobbers Mr. Wanlass in Psychology: Myrtle, tell us how ants build their nests and how they know their enemies. Well, Myrtle I dont know much about it but what I get from it ants build their nests from instinct and tell their enemies from outst.inct. little girl met a farmer with a load of slaughtered swine and dropped a courtesy. The rustic laughed without returning it and What! Do. you courtesy said, No sir, promptto dead hogs? I ly responded the little miss, f.o courtesied the live one. A Tennyson Atkin strutted into the barber shop and took up a pair of green spectacles that lay on the bench, put them on his nose, and said, Barber, how do these become me? Dont you think they improve my looks? I think they do; they hide part of your face. Mr. Tanner (in Biology) Miss Barlow, what is a narcotic? A narcotic is someRowena, Graces little sister Anthony does Grace play cards well? Yes, very well inAnthony Then youd better look deed. out, for mama said if Grace ployed her cards well she would catch you. My speciality, Spring Wedding Gowns. The season promises to be rushing, so get your order in Maude Grosby. Adv. early. Advice to Boys: Never judge a woman by her complexion. It may all be put on. Areta, Little Mary to LaBerta, If I wasnt here Ill bet Rex would kiss you. LaBerta You little wretch, leave this room at once! One woman suggests that the best way to pick out a husband is to see how patiently he waits for dinner when it is behind time. Her husband remarks that a good way to pick out a wife is to see whether the woman has dinner ready on time. Have you embraced all the opportunities here offered you for the prosecution of your st udies as a doctor. The Sophomore blushed and said she believed she had embraced all except Uncle Urie and he was to big for her to reach around. The laying on of hands cure is not the failure some persons believe it to be. Many a wise and excellent mother has used it with great success in the treatment of refractory offspring. to argue against short sleeved dresses. The constitution of the The right United States says: be internot shall arms to bear fered with. It is useless for physicians |