| Show - 164O1e6 ENTERTAINMENT Saturday September The Salt Lake Tribune B5 10 1994 ) I I t I i I If Mr Wonderful scores high on this quiz run Dear Ann: In response to the letter from "Dad in Anaheim- - it is true that there are signs from the very beginning that a mar- ANN LANDERS riage isn't going to work I chose to ignore many of those signs and am willing to admit it in the hope that I can help some young women make better choices than I did My experience is the result of 20 years of marriage if you add my three marriages together Here is my advice: If and when Mr Wonderful shows up and scores three or more on the following test I have one word of advice: RUN! 1 He sees a toilet brush in the bathroom but cannot identify it 2 He tells you he loves you and asks you to marry him on the first date 3 You meet his father who is a "control freak" and his mother the -- family nebbish" whose only purpose in life has been to please her husband (She probably has ulcers and numerous other intestinal problems and doesn't have any idea why she is sick so much) 4 He begins to advise you on ways you can change yourself so you will be more acceptable to his family and friends 5 He borrows 35000 in an 1 ( t N' - 11 - "emergency- but doesn't offer to pay it back since it vill soon be "our" money anyway 6 He consistently refers to oth- er people as "jerks morons and idiots" — especially while driving 7 He doesn't understand why you arent thrilled with the towels he brought you (as a gift) from the hotel he stayed at when he was away on vacation 8 You shop with him for eight hours at 15 different men's stores When you glance toward the women's department his eyes glaze over and he tells you how tired he is 9 His long-terplans for the future include winning the lottery andor the Publishers' Clearing House Sweepstakes HAPPENING TODAY 10 You cook a gourmet meal he enjoys in silence and he is shocked that you want him to help clean up the kitchen (Men who have this warped attitude will feel the same about children) 11 He reminds you daily how "lucky" you are to have him 12 His most frequent (and automatic) response to your opinions is "Mats a lot of BS" Beware of the man who exhibits the aforementioned failings but insists that he just -- loves women" Translated this means "Put a bag on their heads and they all look alike" — Single and Content in Clayton Calif Dear Single and Content You sound like a woman who picked some lemons in those California orange groves Thanks for the input You've made some valid points Dear Readers: We can all use a good laugh today and this was mine: A wife was standing on a ladder painting the kitchen ceiling while her husband was watching a football game on TV "Dear- - she called out "if I fall off will you promise to call the ambulance at halftime I ir The Next Karate Kid that no one needs to see A sequel 401 By Sean P Means i ME SALT LAKE TRIBUNE Didn't wise old Mr Miyagi tell Daniel his young karate pupil in 0 7 I sometimes you should quit when you're ahead! If so ifs a lesson Mr Miyagri didn't take to heart For proof look no further than the unnecessary fourth film in the series The Next Karate Kid" Ralph Iilacchio is nowhere to be found this time Instead Mr Miyagri (played again by Noriyuki "Pat- - Morita) is looking over Julie (Hilary Swank) a rebellious and granddaughter of Miyagi's best friend in his World War II Army unit (Yes Miyagi received the Medal of Honor fighting the Nazis) Miyagi teaches Julie karate of course and helps her overcome anger over her parent& death in a car crash Subplots include Julie's care of a wounded hawk her interest in a classmate (Chris Conrad) her karate education in a Buddhist monastery and her encounters with her school's patrol a Gestapolike cross between the Guardian Angels and a street gang All of this leads slowly and excruciatingly to a double battle be "Annie" Terrace Plaza Playhouse 4700 South Ogden 7:30 pm Tickets who Surobes SHOW NOW i645 1 500 548-340- Kaysvilie r 5c4 km" 1117 tem 1 CAMP (PG-1- 3) 7:00 915 kaywe rya 01 r Rorrpooea MAVERICK 4X cot IL A N WOCOT OPARafSOS NATURAL IF! 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SLM A00010001 50C to llowe (NC-17- 400 5 S4C47 SAT Stift 245 OPKOLPO POWS '11P- As A Dog' ard and titarat- mcredbk ! sexizenl 99 E and 115 ' 7:00 930 110f3 610108 0101111 tli Jkl6 sc43t amok PEAMPf socnottmos Today ONO N Ise OMIP "LITTLE 4Gtoi:(13973m - DITII 114 TIMM T EILCNIAACO 10 "'"ir FORREST GUMP - life Pfy g A (31141103 Tsco-4- 'Aentatscent of EuropaJeart-breakin- : 1 spellindIrt to it s irg abc ut courage and the pOwtf of affinmeg hasan spirt' - itmerian !lone Cassic 0)3 irifE)t MILK MONET 0053t3 140 WM) wpaa megingshot AT LIP 1' Europa will raw 111 (19 1:15 r GEM" "A "qv 'evil ak41c comedy 1 SIC breuwe Gowns kw 230 7CO3 930 AZOtIKAAL PIO PASSES 2:00 030 'ANDRE" 2:t r f MO MUNE DANGER tX 74 03X tglInOt CLEAR cit itk 0 ADOMONAL his-sab- le WORM FAAdlY DOME son Loo43( stollA rool actrr IfOorrik NEXT KAPATI KID MG! 4 CC 310 SCC 70C 9O ISTEOE01 NO PASS 40 DSCOuNT ricirs AO 0SNEYS LION KING tG! 0W 3X SCC 7X 9 cC traECI you kopois FORRIST GUMP tPG131 400 403 700 0000 STEatOi PI" 210 501 003 rrTSC! likfrIS I Sundance Fans lest Audience Award (I)3 OS 915113I antnty pre dek and Fun distalcntra! 47111 drama ar harm IL:41(4- - CAMP NOWHIR1 n4 130 IX IX 7X 57153t COLOR OF MOM ft 9x trtscoo CLEM AND PVIStNT DANGER Proal tx Ix 12x 37not occirovt 9C1 SA! ISA sl hiliAL BY JURY on 4 AS 715 945 rSt71750j I Woe Mc" n key "BEST DRAMATIC FILM" NNORNEksesiowon wsP1ct4 ng Irc i n itek4 PA! - 'VERY FUNNY!" 5ip4-I- Ei tAit Cain's shameless manipulations The Next Karate Kid" (rated PG for violence and mild language) should be the last of the series Or at least we can hope tween Julie and the gangs top student (Michael Cavalieri) and between Miyagi and the gang's ex-commander CoL Etugan (a Michael Ironside) Before we get there we must endure stereotypical hicks and boobs macho posturing philosophical lessons and musical montages of karate training Worst is dialogue Nliyagfs fortune-cooki- e which makes Morita sound like a bad Charlie Chan impersonator Macchio isn't Unfortunately the only "Karate Kid" veteran missing Director John G Mild " Theater 328 5 Bain Park City 7 30 pm Tickets 18 to 112 Presented by Park City Performances "The idisamhrope'' Jewett Center West 8750 seics replacement Christopher Cain ("Young Guns") doesn't have the same touch plucking heartstrings If you thought Avildseifs "Rocky"-lik- e approach was maudlin and sentimental its Kid" Pat Morita her mentor C1:32) g 3750 --Arkis "Next Karate Swank Hilary $115 "Wooten in Congress" Westmmster tete outdoor amphitheater near south park-mlot 1840 5 1300 East Salt Lake City 2 p at Free piC131C snacks invited No Sta Please Were British Egyptian a sir g good-lookin- 12 to 15 Shakespeare compared with t - i: i 1 three "Karate Kid" movies that - - 1250 E 1790 South Salt Lake City 8 p in Tick Pts $3 and I10 Present-ell by Theatre Works West Greek Festival authentic Greek dancing food and oxling demonstratitns and a ch1- dren s cart11 al Holy Trinity Greek iMthocka Church 279 S 300 West Salt Lake City tO am to 10 pm 5K rwa 8 30 a in Tickets $ 2 Harriet Doerr Consider Ms Senyra and Stones for Roma and Florence Kraft Eco- tone: Wailanag cat the Ma rvins KM) S Enztub Bookstore 1500 E 1500 Saith Salt Lake City 2 and 4 p m Free Star Party Harmon s Family Center WO E Fort Union Bh-dusk Free contact the Hansen Planetarium for more ferma t Kids in Charge safety type fur latchkey Inds and thetr parents Ham Latrary 299 E 590 South Salt Lake City 11 a tr Free Coll800 a El nuniter College Centerville noon Tickets 13 Brigad000" Parts Lane Theatre 292 E Pages Lane Centem Ile 7 30 p in Ix lots 17 and 18 "Sexual Perversity In Chicago" Avalanche Theatre at Trails End Wolf Mountain Park City 8 30 p m Tickets $9 for show only: 123 for show and dinner -Macbeth" Castle Amphitheater at Utah State Hospital 1300 E Center St Provo 8 p in Tickets 15 and 17 Rankin ftot Rhinos Utah bands Murray Park Amphitheane 495 E 5300 South Murray 1 to 8 p m Benefit for Ngare Sergoi Rhino Sanctuary in Kenya and rhinelelephant building at Utalis Hole Zoo Tickets $G for adults and $3 for children under 12 Moab Musk leativaL Star Hail Moab 8 p et Tickets 35 19 and $10 Shawn Camp country Utah Stale Fair 155 N 1000 West Salt Lake Oty 0 and 9 p m Tickets $10 to $17 Susan Stevens vocalist West Valley City Center MOO Constdution Bled 12700 Westi West Valley City B p m Free Sousford Prison Experiment hard rock Coppernen Communtly Center 8440 S Harrison Midvale 9 pm Andres Thornock soprano and Jed Mow pianist Tint Presbyterian ChurciL South Tesriple and C Street Sall Lake City 7 30 p Tickets University at Utah Chamber Orchestra Assembly Hall on Temple Square Salt Lake Free Ctn 7 30 p Bluegrass and folk mask concert David 49'78 S 4300 West Kearns 0 Park Gourley and 8 p us Free ZZ Top rock Delta Center Salt Lake City Txtets 122 50 pm -Jane Eyre" Hale Center Theater 28015 Main South Sall Lake 330 and 8 p m Tickets $9 to CZ -- The Prince et Peace" City Rep 638 S State Sall Lake City 7 30 p Tickets 3475 and 17 50 "Big River the Adventures of Huckleberry Finn" StageStop Theatre CoTansion 330 and 730 p in Tickets 35 to Tr "Jangle Book" Terrace Plaza Playhouse 99 E 4700 South Ogden noon Tickets $5 and Makers of 'Next Karate Kid' should be kicked in shins t "Aladdin and BM Wonderful Lamp" Pates Lane Theatre 292 E Pages Lane a a a -- I |
