Show 6W bother The Salt Lake Tribunp Sunday November 20 1988 Baby-boom- er By ture Linda Ellerbee Not long after this happened I dropped out of the children’s cru- was a war baby Born in 1944 Which means I am not a and therefore do not count Products are not designed neighborI baby-boom- Mr and Mrs Bullock Stoker-Bulloc- Alien-Fon- k Kristine Marie Stoker and Rodney Larry Bullock were married Thursday in the Salt Lake LDS Temple A reception was given at Seven Oaks Reception Center The Lion House was setting for the wedding breakfast The bride a daughter of Mr and Mrs Lynn P Stoker Sandy spent a year in New York as a nanny The bridegroom is a son of Mr and Mrs Larry Bullock Sandy He attends Salt Lake Community College and filled an LDS mission to Judd-Crompto- n t hoods are not gentrified and fish are not blackened for my benefit Presidential candidates do not choose running mates with me in mind Time magazine does not care what I think And there's no television show called "fortysomething ” Bad timing that's what it is Had it all my life For instance I was an only child when being an only child did not mean your parents were into growth it meant you were a spoiled brat During the '50s I was freckled when you were supposed to be tanned and interesting when you were supposed to be popular College was more of the same Instead of baking tasty cookies for the school faculty tea I drew tasteless cartoons for the school newspaper When I should have been in my room studying classical French 1 was in my boyfriend's room studying practical biology which possibly is how 1 came to be a bride when everybody else was a sophomore and a divorcee when everybody else was a bride n Kirsten Johanna Allen and Stanley T Foutz were married Nov 5 at the Holladay United Church of Christ A reception was given at the McCune Mansion The bride is a daughter of Mrs Stephen L Ferris Salt Lake City and James Sloan Allen New York She is studying English at the University of Utah The bridegroom a son of Mr and Mrs Stanley Foutz Newport Beach Calif is a sales manager at First Class Cars Karen ‘'Missy" Judd and Troy Forbush Crompton were married Friday at Seven Oaks Reception Cen- ter A reception was given afterward La C'aille at Quail Run was setting for the rehearsal dinner The bride a daughter of Mr and Mrs Jim Judd Sandy attended Salt Lake Community College The bridegroom a son of Mr and Mrs Stan Jex Sandy and Mr and Mrs John Crompton Salt Lake City graduated from the College of Eastern Utah where he was a member of the football team sade cut my hair bought me some shoes with heels some clothes without fringe and three pair of pantyhose found my old lipstick opened a savings account and for the rest of the ’70s I was the career woman of the '80s You don’t need a mantra if yeu don't have time to meditate You don't worry about getting in touch with your feelings w hile you're trying to get in touch with the baby Later when the Age of Aquarius was daw ning 1 was changing diapers (all you really ever need to know about bad timing is that I had two babies two years before Pampers) and the first I heard of Woodstock was when I saw the movie However 1 caught up with the ’60s in time to grow my hair long eat brown rice wear beads go barefoot in winter and speak knowingly of the Second American Revolution But still 1 didn't fit in For one thing nobody else in our commune had a job because for another thing nobody else in our commune had two little babies to look after It was not easy being a working mother in the year of the earth mother but now and then it was helpful like when my husband left me to go off and concentrate on The Big Pic- - sitter And you don’t mellow out and meet deadlines Then for most of the '80s I was depending on who you asked a success a nut case a throwback a cult figure a role model or an idea whose time had come and gone Once in awhile I was even a journalist more or less Now the '90s are nearly here My children are grown 1 work for myself And to me issues like day care balancing home and career wondering whether I can have it all and keep my sanity — well I've already been there already fought those fights winning a few of them losing a lot of them — long before it began to dawn s on you that Doctor Spock was not related to Mr Spock I guess I don't mind really not ber but Lordy it ing a would be nice just once to be what everybody else is when everybody else is so I could read Time magazine and find out who I am Maybe I'll ask my daughter who I am She knows who she is She's known since she was 9 That's when she wrote her first autobiography It began with this sentence: “ I was a war baby Born in 1969" Yeah It's going to be real interesting to see what happens a few years from now when all the politicians the peddlers the polls the parsons and Time magazine try to figure out that generation Real real interesting And so it goes baby-boomer- On going home in America DIETS DON’T WORK If The you have NO willpower JS Your Willpower Weight-Guar- d By Constantly blocks tempting foods Slows down eating stops binges This is not mouth wiring Cannot be seen by others and willpower Shores up NO special diet or costly products If you have trouble staying with a weight loss will give you the program the Weight-Guar- d help you need to lose weight fast self-contr- 263J0Q79 3761ISOI700I 3 have nine months to look this beautiful Maternity is in fashion Look good from the start in the fashionable design of e dress this from our exclusive collection Vou ll find even more Everything you need while vou're days" family has become fractured — the generations are no er connected i long- My own research and that of others strongindicates ly American family members You things were better in "the good old D Family and Human Development Utah State University LOGAN — Vance Packard asserted we are a nation of strangers Leontine Young writing about family life in America argued the ol GATEWEIGHIWEIGHTILOSSICENTE Jay D Schvaneveldt Ph Professor and Head are much more ori- - r- - Schvaneveldt ented to the mother's side of the family We know make contact with and visit the mother's side of the family more than we do the father's side This has been referred to as the "maternal bias" Connecting with family or going back home is seldom easy Often the house that used to be home is gone or occupied by strangers Also family and friends move change grow' up get sick marry divorce break down and eventually die Family members are perhaps too generous in recalling the "way it used to be” As adults we wish to go back in time — to be loved and doted on just one more time by a mother father brother or sister Thinking about the parlor organ a special chair a porch a cocker spaniel puppy a childhood aromas bedroom or create a reality for the notion that mouth-waterin- g But as we have noted it is sometimes impossible to go back home Even when it is possible it is often stressful to confront the symbolic memories with stark reality As James Thurber noted "An imagined kiss is more controlled more thoroughly enjoyed and less cluttery than an actual kiss" Even if the house still stands and family members still live there the reflective memories may not be of good food fun the parlor organ or the sun porch In all too many cases the reflections on home and family may be of physical neglect child abuse sexual deviancy and other types of harsh treatment Alex Hailey talks of his drive to go back home in Roots When people go home to family in a Roots legacy they should be prepared for about the same level and amount of life stress that they experience in daily life All families have closets filled with skeletons cobwebs school dropouts drifters horse thieves and a host of other familiar characters We keep on trying to go back to home and family We will run fast to catch the fading memories of a childhood and often we will actually capture and perpetuate at least part of the dream in the lives of our children F Scott Fitzgerald clearly illustrated the difficulty in going back in time in The Great Gatsby — the elusive green light across the bay was visible but was already too late to pursue Dante's love for Beatrice when he was 18 also illustrates illusions and reality: "It happened that the same won HELLO BERNINA baby-boome- derful lady appeared to me dressed all in pure white And passing through a street she turned her eyes thither where I stood sorely abashed and by her unspeakable courtesy she saluted me with so virtuous bearing that 1 seemed then and there to behold the verv limits of I parted thence as blessedness one intoxicated" Poet Robert Frost said "Home is a place where they have to take you a in" There is probably no golden age of family gleaming at us from back in our historical past When we go back home to fainilv we confront personal history and personal history like all flavors of history contains both the high and the low points of the human storv Twist on tree decorations A By The Associated Press twist on the traditional is suggested for holiday tree decorations this year "Part of the fun in decorating for Christmas is doing the unexpected" says Bette Rosenberg home fashions director for Spiegel catalog merchandiser and marketer "For example a twist on the most traditional Christmas decoration of all the tree" she says “will surely catch everyone's eye" Some ideas for decorating the tree: — Dolls with checkerboard dresses stuffed animals and miniature wooden rocking chairs — Snowmen gingerbread teddy bears and wood crayons e — ornaments and angels — Clowns in black and gold lame costumes and twinkling glass ornaments — White pine cones sleighs and doves — Candles baskets of flowers and carousel horses — Blue and gold ornaments and white candles Birds-of-lov- hand-painte- d H GOODBYE FRUSTRATION! 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