| Show OUR OUK BUDGET OF FUN FUNe SOME GOOD JOKES ORIGINAL AND SELECTED A Trial In the ro Police Court or Why the Culprit Wee Val Innocent of the Crime The rise Dangers Danger of Hypnotism sm Excites Excite the Lordly Vagrants The Ideal Life Lite By William Waldorf Astor Written upon meeting his friend Mr Ur Dusty Rhodes D rather have your Job fob my friend Than tons of or filthy dough For then I 1 should IN s not have to lend To dukes and lords you know t Were I as free tree and p fat as thou And like thou hard as nails I should not have to hobnob now With the likes of ot the Prince of Wales And as you ooze along the way Thy life ute Is sweet I wen You do not have to say Ray good day And breakfast with the Queen O 0 for some humble cavern place With bushes bushe round the door Where I might never feed teed the face faca Of Ot any royal poor O 0 for a shirt and pair of ot pants A pair of ot socks and vest Id I'd give them guys a song and dance And try to do my best Aye friend Id I'd rather have thy Job job fob Although you need a shave shave- Than be an maniac Anglo-maniac slob And fill a royal grave Dangers Danger In Hypnotism Aft J 1 is I It II 1 t Everett Wrest Wrest Wrest-DIs thing of hyp- hyp Is gittin too com com- mon Did ye hear about de accident dat happened ter Weary Saunter A. A Long Long- Long No No o what was It Everett Wrest Wrest Why Why he went ter a farm house ter git a piece of berry pie De farmer was ter home an Ill I'll be dog-bit dog if he didn't make Weary put in a hull day buskin huskin corn Saunter A. A Long Long Great Great blisters bUsters Howd How'd he do it Everett Wrest Wrest Why Why yer see he Weary and made him believe believe be be- lieve he was in de sunny south peel- peel in bananas Lost Opportunity I am afraid the authorities at Washington City are a trifle slow remarked remarked remarked re re- marked Mr Point Breeze asked What makes you say that Ur Mr Murray Hill They neglected to take a census while the flood of seekers office-seekers was at its height Pittsburg Tele Chronicle graph The Bi bt ither ther Was Wal Mistaken Mrs severely severely severely-I I saw him kiss you three times Umes Ethel Miss Oh Oh mamma you are certainly mistaken Mrs T. T Indeed T.-Indeed Indeed Im I'm not Miss T. T T. But But you are mamma He kissed me but once It was I who kissed him the other two times Her ner Painful Shyness Assistant Assistant Im Im afraid the young woman who came on on n the paper yesterday yesterday yester yester- day wont won't do Editor of New Age Age the trouble with her Assistant Assistant too bashful When you speak to her she blushes like a a ayoung ayoung young man Chicago Chicago Record Not III His Dis Fault l m f Judge Judge Judge-Didn't Didn't I tell you I wanted to see your face In fn here no more Prisoner Prisoner ye did yer anner what 01 the copper A A. Sure Case Cac Wiggins Wiggins What What makes you so certain certain certain tain of Bawlers Bawler's patriotism Boggs Why Boggs Why he Just bolls boils over with indignation when he hears of ti c. tM wrongs of foreigners that we have have no interest in Truth t i An After Atter jA IA j I A womans woman's No means means mean's Yes Yep tI said Sometimes it may be so But Dut there are many that are wed Wish her Yes had meant No I Science and Love t Tom Maud Tom Maud had consented to marry me but she fell in love with an an oculist ocul 1st and Jilted me Dick Dick He He no doubt opened her be eyes eye i |
