| Show if ftrijjSfrkji - st JiEB & iitwMriiTrtniifithiiiliitkSM8MaiAvaatiinbiaiiSfe'itiiWiii v"U‘ u&aMva fLv-)t? fefaiKaMfeiaww w inn ii ussHprwwb in- iii— dS- f fV t X & 5 ibikt- - -it THE SALT LAKE TRIBUNE SUNDAY MORNING MAY 15 1932 LIFE THROUGH GYPSYING JUST ELIEVE' IT OR NOTBy Robert L Can’t Something Be Done About It? JIow About Some Beer? Ripley By O 0 McINTTRE From the mail bag: ur-man“Do you Know that here in the Mickey Mouse films are even more popular than in America There are Mickey Mouse cates gown hotel shops and even a Mickey Mouse In Prussia" L D Munich Any Mickey Mouse beer? "The policeman on our beat is named Cyril and our elevator operator marcela his hair What would you do?"—T T New York I'd go on living as though nothing had happened y er v "In a speakeasy the other evening they gave us a cocktail before ordering free It was the sort that keyed me to profigacy I never knew before I not only ordered everything on the menu but six bottlea of wine and two rounds of colntreau” — H J G New York How do you feel this morning “Cant something be done to stop these plays and movies about you Broadway columnists? The public is not particularly interested in how you dive down Into the Bewers to ruin the lives of people who never did you any harm Such films and playa deserve to be boycotted by decent people"—M A New York All right But you poor sap what gave you the idea I'm a Broadway col' umnist? "Why all this flurry about X P Morgan speaking on the radio? Who Is he? Just an International Robin Hood who now wants to aid the unfortunate Isn’t he philanthropic? How about the worthless securities he and others foisted on Innocents? Phoney!” —G M Washington You sound a bit nawsty tlrl “The chestnut trees along the avenue Henrt Martin are in their e Your old colncierge foliage at No 22 in her black dress sJts on the wooden bench In the sifted sunl shine with her yipping Blanchette Sunlight flecks the chimney pots snd cocottes dry their hair out windows Monsieur DuVac has stained his beard a brilliant black They are kicking footballs In the Bois and — well you know how It is"— P T Paris I do know and you touch off a stinging nostalgia snow-whit- kl-y- spade-shape- d Some additional epitaphs collected by Homer Croy for hts forthcoming volume: May Wilson Preston: Here lies the body of May Wilson Preston she moved from New York to relieve the Warner Baxter— congestion did you hear about my operation? Edward G Robinson: X marks the spot Zoe Atkins: She loved Shapes-perla- n sonnets Paris bonnets George Gershwin: Here lies the body of George Gershwin American composer American? Composer? Clive Brook' Excuse me for not rising Owen Davis: Here lies an author As usual Will Irwin: At last catching up with his aleep Ted Cook: Gabriel sound your A Richard Arlen: Out of one depression into another Rupert Hughes: Out of the red at last Frank Borzage: I'm on location Among the theatrical well known who worked for Ous Edwards in childhood: George Jessel Groucho Marx Lila Lee Grace and Helen Menken Eddie Cantor Georgia Price Herman TlmbCrg Mae Murray Lillian Lorraine Earle Carroll Lola Lane Mltzl Mayfair Ray Bolger Armed and Larry Adler t A derelict “Teddy the Mole" lived under the railroad tracks on upper Park avenue for yean until evicted recently In a pipe tunnel An Inexcusable lapse recently made Blyth Daly a daughter-in-laof Frank Craven She is his as everyone Including this writer know Short shavings: Gertrude Atherton former sister-in-laof Chicago’s pride Ashton Stevens "Beer and Skittles ’ is a travel book of Germany la a by those two small-towgals who made good In the city— Helen Josephy and Mary Margaret McBride J P Morgan rehearsed several times for his radio speech The blighting ef-feet of the play “The Captive” is still felt on sales of violets Lilyan Tasb-ma- n has a collection of first editions Jack Dennv is a hit on the radio London's Fleet street was once a sewer drain Dorothy Knap works in a gown shop Gua Edwards was born Gustave Edward St mon in Hohensalza Germany lice Commissioner Mulrooney freckled like Bob Fitzsimmons Glencair S Ogllvle British author fell dead while reading Valentine Williams’ "Death Answers the Bell" Henry L Doherty occupies the presidential auite at the Waldorf Napoleon clung to his old hats Mack Sennett's Dame is Michael He Is a Canadian A picture of Don Clark's wife adorns the Jacket of his latest book The Prince of Wales has been showing M Cohan's daughter GeorGeorge gette London Gertrude Lawrence Is a hit in a London di ama Charles Washburn press agent extraordinary has written “Invisible Ink" which his boss will produce Mayor Walker sidestepped an official greeting to Cincinnati's Mayor Wilson on a recent visit to deliver an anti Tammany speech John McCormack ha a natural marcel Bond of the Hotel of Cuba are In default Fred Sterry Is the managing director Richard Lor krldge dramatic critic ha authored a biography ef Edwin Booth Paul Whiteman now weighing 187 once tipped the beam at 313 The Woolworth building has received its first bath All International bankers are plavlng broke a laugh to insiders Ban'll ok Siam has an Ice Cream Soda street Ivah Payne lives In Portland If you own an 1877 Oregon rent you have a email fortunecopper Lou Forman at the Palace is the Rialto's best dressed conductor Martin Beck Is trying to restore vaudeville to It former status without salA C Blumenthal and his ary wife Peggy Fean occupy a 22 room suite at the Ambassador on Park ave- The Funeral That lasted a Whole Year! BODY OF GENERAL TO KA5HGAR SlNKIANG 2300 W MILES Detachments ot targets wer (iiVN AWAY sent WAS CARRIED THE FUNERAL tbeadta IN A LASTED sow groin enroot? DRWNM PePMZ CHm APRIL FUNERAL PROCESSION- FROM JUNE - ( FROM PEKWtf 1912 TO JUNE the ks toodTo? procession I f ISIfc 193 S' Swag EXPLANATION OF LAST SUNDAY’S CARTOON Sin-no- tt nue (Copyright 1832 by the Mi Naught Syndicate Inc WE MAN WHO SPLIT WE WORLD IN TWO--- Alcxander VI (Rodrigo Lenzuoli Borgia ) was elected to the papacy on August 12 1492 a few days after Columbus had sailed on his great voyage of discovery This Pope’s incumbency coinrides with the greatest exten sion of the papal power Such was the authority of the Roman Pontiff over the secular kings and sovereigns of the earth that at the solicitation of the Spanish kings the Pope promulgated a most astounding document his famous bull on May 4 1493 In it he drew a line tion Arizona Bill 1 t an old Indian fightes that of millions of people Inciinhabiting 'them terthe dentally it gave ritory of the United States and Canada to Spain whileNova Scotia and Newfoundland fell to the share of Portugal “From mere liberality we give concede and assign (donamus conccdimus ct (Copyright “ARIZONA BILL” ARMY SCOUT TO DRIVE MULE TO CONVENTION SCOTT FIELD Belleville 111 (UP) —Raymond Hatfield Gardner better "Arizona Bill” will pull known takes the first nice April day and w Ith hl pet mule Tipperary leave for the Democratic national conven- from pole to pole distributing all the lands and seas recently found or to be found thereafter between two riders the king of Spain and the king of Portugal The Alexandrine line litt rally split the world in two it affected the fate of three continents and He is 88 w Ith a deep brown beard only slightly tinged with gray Each winter Arizona Bill I the guest of some army post on the strength of a letter whli h he explains "was from the secretary of war and entitled me to the courtesies of any ai my post— but 1 lust the letter” He and his burro dropped In at the airport here before Christmas He asked for the commanding officer Lieutenant Colonel John A Paege-loIn due time be was ushered into Paegelow’s presence "I think 1 know you" said Arizona Bill after telling of the lost letter "Yes— I know 1 know you Weren't you wounded at the bloody battle of San Juan hill in the Spanish war? the civilian Don't you rememher scout who gave you a drink and got a couple of nil etcher bearers to bting ” you lu tAr oil — hat wits m Colonel I’aegeluw recognized Ark zona Bill desplta his sge and from then on life at Scott Field approached a bed of roses for the scout He lives around from one company's quarters to another and by the time he gut bnck to one he has a new flock of hair raising stories Tipperary hss a soft bed and a lot of hay— and if the hay supply dwindles his master idviae the colonel and quick ordeni are dispatched According to Arizona Bill when Custer was killed by the Indians he Arizona was but a mile away and srw the ins nr He was w lit tie army when hitting Bull was killed assignamus) to you forever all the islands and lands ” evokes a strange echo in the Twentieth Yet as recently century as 1S93 the state of Venezuela used the Papal bull as an argument in her claim to part of British Guiana before an international tribunal 1932 King Feature Syndicate Ine ) and with Pershing on tha punitlv expedition into Mexico Arizona's plans for his Jaunt to Chicago are vague but he expeits to1 add a pony to his entourage — prefer(Shetland— end pull Tipperary ably on behind BOYS OH N PET MOORE FALLS Ont MtClUrirOTEN (UP) — The Ball cousins Joe and Isaac have a pet moose width fol- lows (hem about like a dog The mo i e i ''i ined u lien II was days old was raised on a bottle I a I J |
