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Show SP&ftTS TALK By DO YOU KNOW HIM? Do you know this . . ROBERT HALES . person? Who else? The athletic manager of the High School. The athletic manager of B. Y. High is the unsung hero of the schools ball teams. He is the man who operates as the coaches right hand man through thick and thin, praise or scolding, win or lose; yes, he is important. This position cant be filled with just anyone. The athletic manager must fulfill the requirements for a bank President and a public relations man. He is in charge of all athletic equipment and its issuing. The little details which are all important in athletics are left up to him. He must keep track of all football plays, score books, time clocks, uniforms, and a million and one other things. This year B. Y. High has found the right man once more. He is Ken Collard. Ken has the personality to keep 35 yelling football players happy without giving in an inch. Ken gives everyone a winning smile and is known for his good humor and happy disposition wherever he goes. Aside from the duties mentioned above, Ken is a regular member of the student council and is in charge of the athletic program of the school in that capacity. Arriving early to a typical football practice Ken has a busy day. First, he gives out a jersey to Don McIntosh who left his home in the wash, next he is confronted by Jay Ballif who wants a new set of cleats, then four men fall upon him like the crickets, each wanting personal service, varying all the way from getting new pants to help on threading a belt. This continues for a solid thirty minutes until practice, starts. During practice Ken is responsible for all balls and the play book, plus arranging for towels and tape. The job is a thankless one and a man like Ken Collard. demanding one needy of a top-not- ch STAR OF THE MONTH Now that the paper is coming out once every two weeks, the star of the month w'ill be announced in the odd issues of the paper, i.e. 1, 3, 5, etc. In the papers that come out in between these, there will be mentioned those who will be announced star of the month candidates. These will be those who have proved themselves deserving to be called the star of the month in the first two weeks. From these the star of the month will be announced in the following issue. The period for the star pickings are rather slim for the first two-wecandidates. With tongue in cheek, Ill nominate the following: Reed Stalworthy, George Olson, Jay Bailiff, Harold Christiansen. ek NOAH WEBSTER SAYS . . . This is the continuation of the dictionary on sports for those who are continually trying to improve their mind. Yells These are the organized shouting of those who are all betting their shorts and new cars on the same team. These yells are usually led by scantily clad girls (this directs the spectators away from the game long enough to carry out the yell) who go through all sorts of contortions in an effort to get people shouting the same thing at the same time. The yells vary from the Jewish national school songs. football yell of get that quarterback to Hymn-lik- e Officials These are the men who run around the football field atmosphere with their shirts. They are there adding a prison-lik- e for the purpose of penalizing those players who have fallen to lifes little temptations (that is spiking, fist fighting and wrestling on the football field.) They also blow the whistle when the play has ended so that the audience will stop looking at the wrong man. Benches These are the very real things on which every young aspiring football player sits at one time or another, or both. Benches are built out of hard wood (with inlayed livers) and never are g. The only word of advice I can give is! that they are bad things, try and stay away from them. Theyre like a dragon if they once get hold of you they dont want to let go. form-fittin- I was struck Merlin Stevens by the beauty of Beverly Ws hand. Then I tried to hold itJ . . . There once was a wealthy young As I said, I was struck by the lady Whose name was Susie OGrady, beauty of her hand. She was tall, dark, and slim, Sse laid the stil white form And always looked trim, beside the others there, And was never the least bit shady. While her shrieks of anguish filled the silent air. Now someone gave Susie a sable, And she laid it down on the table! With one last look she turned upon one leg . . . A moth came along, Tomorrow shell come back again soon was And the fur gone and lay another egg. Though the small creature looked SOME CALL IT POETRY hardly able. Knowing you darling was But, Sue knew hed eaten it all, slightly swell . . . And she made him feel very small, A little of heaven, a little of hell. A parcel of paradise that She sobbed and she sighed, Till the little moth cried. wouldnt jell. . . . Have you ever seen a moth Good bye you. lug, it was ball?? slightly swell. Theatre Gripe Intermountain Theaters!!! Inter mountain theaters! Turn on the radio thats all you hear pick up the paper thats all you read Go down town thats all you can see Intermountain theaters! Doesnt anyone know about the Lawrence Theaters? Joseph . Woops! My mistake, theater ACADEMY. I mean better known as the THE one and only ACADEMY. Why, Id say they get all of fifty people an evening. And a& one of these unhep unsuspecting fifty tried sneaking out in the middle of the feature (get that and right in the middle!!) he was noiselessly slugged by an amazon better known as an usherette, and dragged back to his seat. Just for the joy of it I took watch on a victim last night It kinda made me chuckle. He stepped up to the box, slammed down 50c and whistling a gay tune awaits the upcoming of the ticket. He had never been to this theatre before, I could tell, for little did he know the ticket giver gets stuck every so often and this happened to be a so often . The cashier pounded and kicked and went through an act lhat would have been, hard for an experienced contortionist, and still no. ticket. xAt last (sifter half an hour) she got desperate and pushed the button up came the ticket. She didnt even have the strength left to say the usual thannnk yewwww. By this time there had farmed a line out in the street I would say there were three or four couples (of course this was an opening night one can expect a crowd). But just the same after the poor lad had gotten the ticket and made his way through the yellow, maroon, and black swivle design carpet to the red box to that inntellectual being who brightens the foyer with his Charles McCarthy leer and his Good evening jest take prosiac the aisle to yer right or left, he opened his eyes and beheld in full bloom the delicate pale lavender fountain, green velvet drapes, pink and silver walls, sky blue furniture and robin egg blue uniforms. Apparently he had captured the mood of thes. theatre at the wrong time with a mild ejecula-tio- n that left the theatre walls vibrating, this same proud ticket WILDCATS PLATTER CHATTER DEFEAT SPANISH DONS The B.Y. High eleven trounced Spanish Fork 20-- 8 for their first win of the season. The game was all one-sidwith B.Y. High the field from start to finish with the victors scoring once in each of the first three quarters. The game is the start of many victories for the white and blue squad. The first touchdown was the result of a long sustained first quarter drive from the Wildcats line to the uprights. Jay Ballif carried the ball over on an end sweep. The extra point was a pass from Christensen to Ballif. The blue clad Y boys again found pay dirt in the second ed ten-ya- con-troli- ng rd quarter after a seventy-yar- d drive. The score was the result of a wide end run by Captain Reed Stalworthy. Christiansen carried the ball on a line plunge for the third goal. The extra point was carried over by Stalworth for the total of 20 points. The Spainards threatened twice in the first half, but the B.Y. High eleven were never in serious trouble until the fourth quarter. Here a safety was scored and later a touchdown pass was thrown for Spanish Forks lone tally. Both teams were playing hard ball with the Y taking the lead. The offensive play of coach Dixions team loked better than it has at any time in the past. It came through with the spark that has been at times through the season. The team and students are now looking forward for a repeat victory in the games that follow and from all indications they are the team to keep the region guessing. DINING OUT FOR THE LAST TIME Are you bothered with too Do you want many friends??? people to dislike you instantly? If so, just follow these instructions and you will become an expert. First of all sneer! Greeting your hostess with a sneer is the first step in dining out for the last time. Practice at home fh front of your mirror until you have the most horrible sneer possible, and use it. When someone greets you on the street, sneer! When you enter a friends house sneer! Most important of all, dont smile like a zipper, a smile can.be your undoing. The next step is those nasty, personal slams! When first introduced to someone, acknowledge the introduction by some remark such as My, thats a beautiful wart on your nose! or You ought to have some work done on your teeth. My friends friend has a friend who goes to Dr. so and so, and Ill give you his address. When Mrs. Van Snoot, who has known you since you were knee high to a grasshopper comes bubbling up, you greet her with a remark such as My you look nice, new hat and new purse, did you make the dress? And those shoes look so big and comfortable. If this doesnt send her storming off, try using the most effective friend destroyer a belch!! Belching is an art which must be practiced until you have it perfected it is even more effective when accompanied by a remark such as Well, you cant vomit everytime!! or What did you expect, Chimes?? Then the next step in dining out for the last time is the meal. When dinner is announced, dash to the table with a starved look in your eye, plop yourself down in the nearest chair, tuck your napkin under your chin, after you have very obviously wiped your silver on it, just sit there drumming loudly on the table. When the meal is served, just pick around at everything, and eat nothing, or, on the other hand, gobble the meal down and be finished long before the rest have even started then lean back in your chair and belch loudly! While the others are finishing, sit there extracting food particles from your teeth with loud sucking noises. If you have false teeth you might remove them and let them soak in your water glass. In the discussion which is bound to follow the meal, pull out a heavy soft lead pencil and proceed to diagram everything you say on well-directe- Thursday, October 9, 1947 U. High School, Provo, Utah B. Y. d, Hi ya! peasants! Hows the old grind treating you? Well, if you can forget your afflictions for a few seconds come into the shack, drape yourself all over a chair and give a listen to the latest on the top bands in America. On the sweet and Sentimental On the Jazz Throne we find (and who else) Maestro Stanley Kenton and his newly reorganized band. For all of you cats this is glad tidings of great joy long side of things Eddy Howard seems to have top honors. His latest output Kate and I Cant Get Offn My Horse (which is one of the best Wgfcterns Ive ever heard) are hitting top sales records. A close tie for the runner ups are Tex Beneke and Vaughn Monroe. Texs latest is a little number called Too Late. It is supposed to be his best waxing since Glenn Miller style. On the reverse side is the recent I Have But One Heart. Mighty smooth for you sentimentalists. Tex has also put out those unbeatable jazz classics Body and Soul and Stormy Weather. Great collectors items. Vaughn (Muscles) Monroe, has two new discs with four wonderful sides just out. Stars Will Remember, My How Ballerina, the Tune Goes By, and My Devotion (very, very nice.) You who go in for the husky type of voice will like Yhese latest by Monroe (and there seem to be quite a few of you.) awaited. You know Stan had a serious illness this summer, but now hes fit as a fiddle and back to work. However minus the pastels who have given up such dreamy stuff as After You, There Is No Greater Love, and their latest (and last) Down in Chihuahu. Be sure and lay hands on it! Stans latest instrumentals are two discs with all famous Kenton rhythm and then some! Minor Riff and The Spider and the Fly are musts! Kenton works in some wonderful sax with his top man Vido Musso; (and that The bands boy really blows.) (a la canary, June Christy is with band the back Femme!) too. Ah more joy. His best recording is quite a ways back, but tricky mood setting Willow .Weep for Me, try it and find out. Bat now tis time for you ickies to undrape yourselves and file out of the shack. (Im going to bury myself with a pile of these latest Kenton discs, so next time when you come, be sure and dont break any when you dig me out.) INQUIRING WHOS WHO . . . What do you think of the way girls are dressing this season? Boys . . . Robert Hales I think theyre going a little to the extreme instead o f using good sense. Don McIntosh Theyre wearing too many formals. s. George Lewis SOPHOMORE CLASS? REPORTER Insired-atroc-iou- Henry Taylor ding? Are you kid- Junk them Erven Nelson skirts! Dick Boyle As far as Im concerned shorter skirts mean longer looks. Percy Pinwhistle I think skirts should stay up hemlines, that is. Kent Broadhead I think they are very becoming be coming off any minute. Mr. Clarke I think they are all looking like they did in 1910. Girls . . . Joyce Nicholes I think the skirts are too long. , Joan Shriver I like the long skirts when theyre straight and not full. Lois Burch Its all right with me, but what do the boys think? Maxine Claudin I think its nice as long as they dont get it too long and especially for school! Betty Wallace horrible. I think theyre Nancy Browning ... They look like . . . well Jo Lene Perry I think girls look better, because the skirts are longer, making their shapes IN THE Thats what Im asking you. Those of us who stayed arent worth mentioning, so lets skip it and consider the newcomers. A lusty quartet, namely Nada Marilyn, Winona, and Velda were heard barking at the moon: We We are the gopher girls, always gopher men (like Dale,. Don, Dave and Roger-- ) They never gopher us, we them. Whats to do about it? The only bright thing in Mr. Jensens class is Eddy Maloney. Kent told me very confidentially that he is worried. He says Mrs. Hart is really too old for him. History-makin- g Epic: Our class at long-la- st has more boys than girls, or should I divulge such inforfnation? We had a hot election with Dick White Boyle coming out on top as class prexy. We know hell do a swell job. Jack Wing has kept his fingernails intact, and will continue to sharpen them on the blackboards. Sssshhh have you girls heard the latest about J.O., S.S., ana W.P? Well, why dont you ask someone? Slong Your Class Crier. more shapely. Mary Ann Wilson I think are supurb foY modest girls. they The Bachelors a cagy guy, And has a lot of fun. He sizes all the cuties up, And never Mrs. one. LOYALTY TO YOUR SCHOOL . . . This is a poem that rather fits our High School, so instead of writing long articles on'School Spirit we just print this here for you to think over. If you want to live in the kind of a school, Thats the kind of a school that you like, You neednt slip your book in a grip And start on a long, long hike; Youll finally find what you left behind; For theres nothing really new. Its a knock at yourself when you knock at your school It isnt the school its you. bearer, the carefree theater patron dropped to his knees and with one wild emploring gesture scat- the hostesss best white tabletered the bills from his wallet as cloth. If she doesnt sit there tearreward for his safe return to ing her hair out, dont worry, she civilization. ' wux her husbands when you have AND THATS WHERE BUSI- finally gone. v NESS GOES!!! If you follow these hints and P.S. Dont forget to watch fof instructions carefully, we can this column every issue to keep guarantee youll be dining out for the last time. up on. your Theatre Guide. V Real schools are not made by lads afraid work hard to get ahead; When everyone works and nobody shirks, """f' a school from the dead, And if while you make your personal gain, Your neighbor can make one, too. Your school will be what you want to see, It isnt the school its you. Ruth Steinberg, The Hickory Twig, Hickory High School, Hickory, N. C. To YLD Editor Assistant Editor Faculty Advisor Business Manager News Editor CAT STAFF Janie Spears Mary Young Mr. Mercer Nancy Brown Barbara Romney Feature Editor Maralyn Bailiff Bob Hales Sports Editor Yolonda Perry Society Editor News Writers Lyman Durfee - Kent Lloyd Feature Writers JoAnne Price - Betty Wallace Harold Christensen Sports Writer Make-U- p Nila Jean Brown - Laven Lee Carolyn Robertson - Gladys Johnson Paul Salisbury - Elroy Nelson Copy Readers Russel Fairbanks - DeVere Brough Ruth Goulding - Maurine Perry - Wyla Camenish Typists |