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Show COMICS* TV + ANN LANDERS D Che Salt Lake Tribune FRIDAY, DECEMBER 29, 1995 Bl ybreakies THE THINGS THAT COUNT MUSINGS JUDY MAGID I once was a guest at someoneelse's graduate-school class reunion. It was fun to see people I had met fromtime to timeoverthe years; it was interesting to meetthe few I had heard about for years There wereseveral second wives and a couple of second husbands among the classmates. Someone was ona third marriage. Each class member took the podiumto a few words. Two small speeches remain with me ‘I play seratch golf and ampresident of mycountry club,” a distinguished- looking mansaid. He added, “I'm sure most of you keep up with my profes- sionalactivities in the journals. I have been most fortunate to be elected to several state-association offices and may havea goat a national one A second manextended his handtoward a handsome woman seatedat a table in the middle of the room “You probably remember Mary Jane. We were married all through school. She's still putting up with me We have had some toughyears. One of our kids has been in trouble. It’s been hard, but it looks like he will be all right. We aregrateful for our family our friends and each other. Paul Fraughton/The Salt Lake Tribune Troy Duty,left, and Maughn Rollins are raising Duty’s 7-month-old niece, Nicole. The men had a ceremonyformalizing their commitment in October. Legal or Not, S.L. Men Take Their VowsSeriously ByBrandon Griggs ‘THE SALT LAKE TRIBUNE In their eyes, Troy Duty and Maughn Rollins are a married couple and parents to a 7-month-old girl In the eyes of Utah, they are room- mates. The two men cemented their relationship in an Oct. 1 weddinglike ceremony at a Salt Lake City restaurant, complete with flowers, cake and 150 guests. They announced the event with asmall advertisement in that day’ tions of The Salt Lake Tribune, becomingthefirst gay couplein thestate to trumpet their union in a mainstream Utah newspaper. We want to demonstrate how our reality, even if it’s not a political reali- ty,” said Rollins. “That's what matters to us. And the politics will just have to catch up.” In Utah, gay marriage will not be a political reality anytime soon. Same- sex weddings are not legal anywherein the United States, but Utah has taken extra steps to discourage them. Earlier this year, Utah becamethe first state uals. “The morepeople that see [gay rela- homosexual members of devout Mor- them and it’s not such a freak thing. Duty said. Gay stereotypes arereinforced by media coverage offringe groups such as militant activists or flamboyant drag queens, hesaid. “It Church's opposition to same-sex mar- ding rings. In public, Rollins occasion- where. Anticipating that Hawaii some- ally refers to Duty as his husband day maysanction same-sex weddings, This openness has wonthemthe admirationof friends and the support of many of their co-workers. It also has Utah legislators voted overwhelmingly for the bill. cost them friendships and strained theirties to their families. Rollins’ par- Still, ceremonies uniting gay couples are not uncommon — even in Salt Lake City, where a handful ofpastors routinely preside over same-sex “commitment ceremonies.” Combined, ministers at the Metropolitan Community Church and the Unitarian Universalist Church performed about a dozen such tionships], it becomes morenormal to helps if people can see there areother gays whoaren't in those extremes. ents, who live in Provo, did not attend the ceremony; he has not spoken to themfor three months “It's been really hard for me,” he said. “I go back andforth between be- ing angry and being really sad.” But Similar Backgrounds: Duty. 28 and Rollins, 33, met two years ago ata Christmas party. Their backgrounds were strikingly similar: Both graduated from OremHigh School and attended Brigham Young University. Both served LDSmissionsin Thailand. And bytheir mid-20s, both had ceased be- ing active in the LDS Church, inpart over the church's position on homosexuality In March 1994, during a trip to Bryce Canyon, the couple agreed to formalize their relationshipwith acer- unions in the past year, and theprocession of gay couples to the altar shows no sign of slowing. tionshipfirst. And both hopetheir ex- wedding is just as legitimate as any other. Oneof the lines in our wedding vows wasthat our marriage is a moral What makes Duty and Rollins dif- ples to comeforward and help combat emony. Troy's mother, a lesbian who lives with her partner in southernVirginia, was thrilled. Gaining the bless- ferent? First, they are raising a child negative perceptions about homosex- @ See GAY COUPLE, B-7 both men believe in putting their relaample will encourage other gay cou- thinking that some bled recesses of memory for a decade or more. It might havestayedtherepermanently if a dear friend, also the motherof a dear friend, had not invited a small group for lunch a couple of weeks ago. In the hurried, harried pre-holiday rush, theelegant dining room was aquiet haven. Thetable was beautiful, with whitelinen and dishes topped with red napkins folded into sleds. Ceramic an- riages. The two men wear gold wed- to pass a lawprohibiting recognition of same-sex marriages performedelse- remember That reunion remainedin the jum- — an increasingly frequent occurrence for lesbian couples butstill rare among gay men. Second, unlike most monfamilies, they are boldly public about their sexuality, even going so far as to picket outside Salt LakeCity’s Temple Square on General Conference weekend to protest the LDS I peoplefind out early on what is important. Others neverhave a clue. gels surroundeda green centerpiece An angel ornament decorated each place setting, and outside the window the cityscape might have been hung ina gallery I looked around the table at my friends. They are remarkable. Among them are experts in theater. fashion, design, food, art and Theyare readers and thinkers. erydaylives full of family and music dance In evhome they have madetime forothers. They work with the Girl Scouts, the AIDS foundation, the food bank, thearthritis foundation and church groups. We know — and care — alot about each other As weordered lunch, our hostess said, “I would like us to shareour best @ See MAGID, B-7 UP IN SMOKE Woodpile wisdom Exposing moreof a woodpile's surfaceto air increases the speed the firewood dries. That's why the logs are split, to expose more of the freshly cui wood to the air. Here are some suggestions on where and howto pile wood: a Pile wood in the open where the sun and the wind can drythe pile out ® Waterproof covers BH ‘btherendsootthe pile _Astandard cord of wood is 8 feet long, 4 feet high Do not use a tree as a of tall as you makeit, but only onestick wide. If a gtspy let them slope or prop to hold yourpile up. @ shade casibythe tree will shed water even Petterbutargtougher and 4 feet wide. Aneffective woodpile can be as long (har) ooh andes double row is madeit reduces theflow ofair and hides two ofthe four faces ofthe pile. rooting paper both work well if held in ae. 1 Thepile shouldbe placed across passes through the pile, not we By FionaSoltes THE NASHVILLE TENNESSEAN hari, eae heavy If romance had anything at all to do with heating Peeeee efficiency, and tears eas would be at the top of the stack works well bu the prevailing wind sotheair process Sexy Wood-Burning Stoves Need Not Cost a Fortune the plastic drape over @ Stack woodwith the bark facing up to help the sides of the pile It traps wood-burning fireplaces and stoves Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way According to Mother Earth News, wood ranges the wood, Do not let around it from50percent to percent efficiency, far behind electricity (100 percent) and natural gas (90 per: r under the cover drying and prevents e Putting the averagecost of a cordof wood at $100. the magazine estimatesit will cost you $500 a year to Natural gas, on the other hand, are fairly mild winters, you might not needfive cords the pile where weeds won't grow —ona large rock or an open lawn — and where you can eo the ground. You can rack 0! straight po coihinh here @ A couple of gentle curves ¢ slow backbone the wind and help hold moisture @ Keep the pile off use a mowaround the woodpile. Tall weeds and grasses can averages Keep in mind, though, that if youlive wherethere @ If possible, place f pilestill po adlergl 2 oe uae ti al s en eae } 4 an m of wood per year. stuff that’s been split and stackedfor a while. Dave Johnston, managing editor of Alternat Energy Retailer magazine, says wood that ha: and whenit burns, the energy is used to evaporate the water, not put off heat ) w ai Jonepo." design, you may get more heat if the doors are open when it’s in use, Johnston says. @ Keep it clean. If you're burning woodin the fireplace, have your chimney cleaned andinspected (For safety’s sake, make sure the area around the fireplace is lear of combustibles before youlight up. Store ex- fe firewood at least 3 feet fromthe hearth.) If looking for woodalready cut andsplit, check the Yellow Pages and newspaperclassified-ad section Firewoodis sold by the cord — high, 4 feet wide, If you're a romantic at heart, or like the idea of using wood, there are somethings you can do tc improve wood's efficiency @ Season it. Green woodis less efficient than the been seasoned fully still may contain water, in. @ Experiment. Keepthe glass doors onyour fire place closed whennot in use. Depending ontheunit's by a professional sweep every year. heat with wood, whileelectricity is quite a bit more |iF ae takes six to nine mon @ Update your stove. Today's EPA-certified wood stoves andfireplaceinserts use percent 33per cent less woodfor the same amount of heat thanthe old, uncertified models Fireplaceinserts are a systemof tubes that draw cold air from thefloor of the house. warmit and expelit out the top. stack of wood4 feet 8 feet long. sources for free or almost-free firewood truction sites. Ask the contractorif you can e leftover wood @ Parks. Check with park departments for wood trimmed in maintenance. @ Large landholdings. Offer to remove downed wood @ State forests. Forest conservation requires periodic thinning of dead and diseased trees and removal of downed wood. Contact forest services. |
