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Show The Salt Lake Tribune SAVVY planning. This isa very poor * way ofthinking” because law. Planning can yers, not family members, will be forced to work it out, he said. ts fi Consider whether you should spare cs been avoided ifthe parent had to.accept a decision that Mom Patiestoagreeoneverything _—_[executor] made. If you antict executors, which require both cific items that they wanted that —- plans, asking if there were spe ae doesn't receive what he or she expected. That problem can be made versus a decision that the avoided by being up-front with the children so there are no pre- ea sumptions. about it.” very items, y fights are over Remarriages also can pose problems for parents who intend to leave their children ev- @ Continued from Cl enced child financially — with college, with a down payment for a tate sale. The parent should also consider how disinheriting a family things that never go to court, such as who pays the freight on @ Piano that was left toa rela- An attempt to avoid tax lia bilities can also sow the seeds of a familyfight, as happened Kotver, attorney and co-author — and not the others. That can —_create bitterness among sib- relationship with the rest of the children, because they are the ‘Ty, Kotzer said. He recommends an explanatory letteror homemade will that oneson inherited a bowling alley.Every- home, bank account, insurance and pension is jointly owned Fight: Planning to Avoid It.He has seen brothers and sisters at each other's throats, family relationships ripped to shreds along dren need to talk, Kotzer said. The discussion doesn't have to take a “gimme” tone; instead, fo—_cus on the importance of having any emotional fallout. Carefully weigh who to appoint as executor. “Sometimes they pick the will, specifying why certain items go to certain people. “[An explanatory letter} takes lot of the burden from the bowling alley sat on, wentto other siblings. They became their brother’s landlords, and urged on by their spouses, partners receive a windfall because the deceased spouse didn’t understand that everything thatis jointly owned goes “Don't assume good will between your children,” he ad- Discussion also can be prompted by asking the parent smarts, sometimes they pick the person who has the most legal _if he or she has established a power ofattorney incase ofa debilitating illness, Kotver said. ‘That choice should be dis- experience or the most business experience,” said Nelson. “That might be the worst person to choose if the person...isleast over estate house, with free room and board —_|ings. Parents and adult chil- with Barry Fish of The Family with the family pinotos. an up-to-date will. vised, and don't rely onthemto fairly distribute the assets. “Ifyou were tosay Tm going to leave it all to [my son] Billy and he'll look after [his sister} cussed; an adult child may not Mary,’ what if Billy dies. Will want sole responsibility and person who has the most street the child who gets [the item],” raised the rent where their Kotzer said. _less of the will, Kotzer said. If that new spouse later dies with- Personal property fists: In Utah, a personal property list that outlines specific bequests may supplement willortrust. Expectations: Kotzer also is seeing more adult children who feel entitled to the fruits of their out updating his or her own will. family possessions in_tended for one set of children in_stead are passed onto the new the will and cannot include be- ing. trusted.” The list must be referenced in Logistical planning: Consider, too, where that person lives. if quests of money, stocks or rea) Property, such as a cabin. In- Depression-era parents’ scrimp- people think only the rich need will, Kotzer said, but it isim- state, it is not going to work if there is a complicated estate use to pay debts, Kotzer said. portant to designate how any as-_ ville attorney Trent D. Nelson, who specializes in family wills distributed. He told of a mother who thought she was avoidinga 1 bl and trusts. “They're always changing. You don’t know what famil designating that ep oinetcd possessions ie goingto run into in their lives.” her death and the money di- tate. That person also is entitled havingto go through an attor- who arrived at his office driving Math and emotion: A parent maytry to be fair by splitting things evenly, using mathematics instead ofemotion to distrib ute money, mementos and other assets. However,ifone child is the caregiver, emptying bedpans and chauffeuring the parent to doctor appointments and the other children are rarely around, the result is inadvertent inequality, Kotzer said. In the case ofthe caregiver, he recommends telling family members thatthe care- vided among her children. ‘The woman’s daughter wanted a crystal vase that she had taken great pains to buy for her mother, but her brothers, as executors, were following their mother’s will to the letter. Furious, the daughter removed the vase from her mother’s house and smashed it in the parking _Jot as Kotzer, who was handling the estate, watched. “Now nobody can have it,” Kotzer quoted her as saying. “You could sense the hatred to reimbursement for expenses, 90 travel expenses may eat up the estate, Nelson pointed out. While executors are entitled by law to fair andreasonablecompensation, many waive payment. ‘That often helps build credibility in families where someone doesn’t trust the execu. tor. Also, rethink appointing a daughter- or son-in-law as backup executor, Kotzer cautioned. A child’s marriage may not be permanentand an ex- Ney.” Nelson emphasized the importance of considering potential land mines when writing a Willand how todeal withthem. “You almost have to consider worse-case scenario,” he said. Consider giving the executor the discretion to sell an item if an argument ensures over who is entitled to a particular possession. “If you know everybody loves your spoon set that came over from Norway,consider an expensive car, wearing designer clothing and a Rolex watch. The client had lost everythingin the dot-com crash; he was now a “waiter” but Kotzer was puzzled. How could he afford such a wealthylifestyle if he was waiting tables? Turns out he was waiting to inherithis _parents’assets. “There is an assumption out there that what was your parents will be yours, and will be yours equally with your siblings. This is where the problem giver is receiving alittle more as that was starting [because] her family member could end up who you want that to go to.It’s comes in,” Kotzer said. Things a show ofappreciation. brothers wouldn'tgive it to “Kids are elastic,” said Kays- sets and sentimental items are financial consequences they're betterget it right and better put some thoughtto the wording in ulary when it comes to estate that will.” ° years, whereasmy generation are sort of the spenders. We conduct bank business on the parent’s behalf. When the par- that is going to take several whom. grew upinthe 70s and we have _—entdies,that child receives ev- This causes logistical prob» lems and can place a financial S@¥ ‘I wantthisantiquesewing machine to go to Joanne,” said _the latest fad. Our parents were alwaysthe ones saying ‘save burden and stress on the executor who has to take time from Nelson.“It’s not like a will where you haveto redo it . . y'our money, Y, Wait for a rainy y day,’ ” he said. JRO Pervite DATES mia Corp. eg pe : adult child. Often this is done because it allows the child to to have the latest technology, You can update that without _erything in the account. The potential for warfare over will can affect any family. Multimillions do not have to be at stake. Nelson recalled three Kotzerrecalled one client sisters who fought for more than a year over the small estate of their father, who died withouta will. “They never mourned the passingof their father. They got so caught up with fighting with eachother that they forgot that theylost their father,” he said. “The average family doesn't understand how close tothe line theyare, It doesn't take much forthe family to be destroyed,” Kotzersaid. “Just be organized,” Nelson said. “Doing nothingis the best wayto have problems.” kgurchiek@sitrib.com = ae romtag Notices duisteed Neteae \Geaperty Will be 08d ot ||News | Nees ie ieeeareroee veer eee oe naaee }| Nee POTN MOTICE Beierati, |e oreacd saeces wr [ieGo esa gee ee (erteaPteRe CeCL he ee eea Wrscahee 188 Sees,bee” eeeTEES ovrERS” Rorgoge Y Nok girton boy baer Sdfe felon 1BS Omer Printing Center| orded 6 Rorembr 75,1007 of Entry Ne. 1007292 1980 Industrial Circle, Salt Book 3174 at Poge official records and covlate iy thn.let, hefolontg 1304 ook ofpropery cated Dov Gert Gres Son take|” iy ten Al of Lol 11, SCENIC HLS SUBDIVISION, occort roject ee walt: Sooty Utah the Davis County Recorder. in cortified funds to the frustee at the time of sale, with Tes Yorattes010120018 ; teesaesmeetsaie i Matheson Courthouse, renee the CHE BTWERT* 435-447-0715 $14 Moin EVE'S TEMPTATION er heeratte pm lf mat be, prepared 10 fender fo the trustee |$5,000.00 he 10leonde polcrce’ofthep IheheDroponed brolct $BietidheBato he hove ee 1805‘om: neayfotoey he [nowino hiesocnrn| 15484 % See ifoaree4 04 j2—Entertainment Services ed) Peas i * * athio Way, fn oie of ne Coty Necardar fsol foeHaars Coyote of Uc, asecby Fe All ofding ot to18,freNOUAN ESTATESin thePLATOffcé "A", labI6 mt low money te Untied ot heof faebt OfficialSPRINGS Plot erect |sale (axcons biddersoFmut tender Stoves 2 Gepoxt $5.000 ide sdDew sioins hobitty yo ‘roparty vated fn soid:Couty eae “gaate os een2h a tak eter Caairrsie fametors tm rete wrt) cngealertoy vendofro (40.24) ioc, on meted ownersof property ot of detga ‘ar Yoporied Yo be'Towre Lothar altoners ekeodobserconmees Cations, canetr Tha comple eogeerg De € Seen egeton rie taytrmine BOTT. Elimcted ESCORTS Sie eee lowing real property kecated in Davis County, Stote of of Perea) ofl ond of record |ee the qdien ea The ee peesal Sepia a liesBoss seid of heHct ecunarfo, Ro |g reerty tees Sree ayBO 1, 3007 EyNo 1752098 w hom S842 |G aren Us toDed of Und Tocrded Laie Septet | at Page 605 of oil record cod covering fhe ft, S900, 0 a. Ne, 7717000 in toot $359Poe 205%, miantioee Trem 901.0003239 BARELY 48 AND VERY HOT] “A personal property listcan orto Notices Notices Ue couponcutters. They would keep the same car for many e see AO suey aod 041—Escort Services 041—Escort Services EXECUTIVE VOGUE?® |i SORORITY|e s GIRLS 5 eee = clude enough detail—such as “grandmother's diamond en- months to administer, he said. ° | hpdeh gagementring”—soitisclear which item is being given to the child you most trust to be the executor lives in a distant _.. . is written in stone, so you ‘they'll work it out’ really shouldn’t be ina parent’s vocab- 485-6626 of the consequences of holding a _joint bank accountwith an her,” he said, noting that “a will fair,” Kotver said. “The phrase pole “That generation wasasaving generation. They were the were to be sold within 30 days of work to travel tohandlethees- “Being equal is not always spouse’s children. Parents should be aware, too, ter, whom he believes will squander money that hecould Leaving instructions: Most to the surviving spouse, regard- brother lived and created afamily rift. does not have to accept the appointment. haps Billy has financial probJems and opts not to help his sis- by the surviving spouse. Those _thing else, including property Videotape that supplements the ones who will have to deal with —_erything. but “everything"— whena parentstipulatedinhis tive wholives across thecoun- member will affect that person’s Billy's wife have good will toward her sister-in-law?” Per- og TIC YeREDY GIVEN Tat eS ° papi WL he UTAH MATURE $400 BEFORE 7 p.m. ENTERTAINMENT GUIDE Feo| un = iy, fox F hagas2h i Hobie be (601) 3Ucn 63 mitng he provaldopprorl oe 82023 Utoh's hottest new armani wil oho be ox, 328-3536 webutel 6010: 36,SOUNY509east d utahmatureentertain- NOWHRINGH | Sorter peas OES YY LEATHER & LACE = ete . ms pa xFe et 1600 W, town Sra, Sordn, DaNe rai ed oeondSeen Ths, 11.26 ee Gide Viah for 2 ond Vh08 ‘by sold ote tradOwed ot tee oe net fet iat Weatal rey an Ws egonShorted. 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