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Show Bl4 The Salt Lake Tribune CALENDAR Friday, November IfOlivia Refusesto Seek More Help, It’s Time to Makea Lifefor Yourself Dear Ann: ! have beenseeing “Olivia” for four yee When we met, she was unemployed, didn’t ha car and wall withsuchforce, it broke inhalf? [ have thrown heavy chairs andtornadooroff its hinges. Iamnotabig man. It seems an adrenaline rush comesover mewhenI get an- ANN LANDERS was living ina run-down apartment that her parents owned. I helped her find a good gry, and I do thingsthat sur. job, and in few months, she ha prise me. Onlyrecently have I man nough money to buy a used car’. Olivia has a 6-yearold son. His grandmother baby-sat for him and spoiled problem. | am trying to be sup- him rotten while Olivia worked, Eventually, Olivia portive, but I feel trapped. What should I do? Going Nuts in New Jersey hadabsolutely no control over the child, and he ran her ragged aged to get my anger under — f Tconvince:{ her to stand up Dear New Jersey: Apparent- ly, the doctorOlivia has been to her mothe r and demandthe seeing has not been very help- right to discipline the boy This resulted in a huge argu ment. Olivia was kicked out of the apartment and.could not manage to pay renton her ‘There own, so | allowed her to move in with me. (I felt responsible for the mess she was in.) We havebeen livingto: gether fora year, and Olivia has.gone through some drastic changes: She has gained a lot of weight. (People askif she’s pregnant; she is not.) She also. doesn’t brush her teeth or comb her hair. She looks like a bag lady. Needless to say, our tic life is pretty dismal. was diagnosed with depression and has been on medi cation, but it hasn't helped 1 had planned to marry invest todpropose. Tstill I ive her, but sheis ph pulsive in her c tion andrefuses to discuss the ful. She needsto see nother psychologist or medi help her. Please urgeOlivia to move inthatdirection. If she is willing to try to help herselfget well, stayat her side. If not, move on and make a normal life for yourself. You've paid yourdues. control. I tried several doctors andfinally foundonewho dis: covered the combination of _ me. Jamenor fi throughall of this. She keeps mein check by monite moods. don’t realize that 1amabout to fly off the handle, shewill reach overand gently squeeze myknee 'to let me knowthat I am showing somewarning signs. There havebeentimes whenI didn’t think I could go on, but knew I hadto, for her menwhoflies offthe handle tremely happy. I consider my- share-my letter with your ‘s. Perhaps it will help others who have been in my shoes. Thad a problem with small tting meoff. | was vatching TV, andthere- plore Utah. to my wife for seeing me for no apparent reason and goes into terrible derstandthefrustre pressed bythe women who have written to you. Please Invites you f0 .. anti-depressants that works for sake as well as my.own. My wife has always been patient and loving, even during the worst of it. Nowshe gets my eS Dear Ann: | am one of those CheSalt LakeTribune verybest, and weareexear think medication gt id iton, Ann. — Markin Texas Dear Mark: Yourfrank (and but it saved my maybemy life. Pa: humble) letter is sure to help others who are fighting depres- sion. Blessyoufor yourcan- motecontrol didn't work. I be- dor, and an orchid to your came so angry, I threwit at the wife. NEWSTIP HOTLINE See or know of something we needto be covering? uta cityauide.com 257-8742 | Your one-stop Cocal online resource! Brought to you by The. Salt Lake Tribune. Food & Drinks Guide * Get a taste of the town with the restaurant guide, sorted by specialty to match your mood. * Drinkin all the town has to offer with the bar and private club guide. Entertainment & Events Guide * Plan a night (or two!) on the town with the handy Event Calendar. * Is the latest release a must-see? UseFilm Finder to” help you determine what's wortha trip to the box office. DowntownSalt Lake City Friday, November23, 2001 5:00 to 8:00 PM Thelocal holiday “Lights On”tradition continues this year when downtownSalt Lake City and Temple Squareare spectacularly illuminated for the seasonwith thousandsoflights! Join Santa and Mrs. Claus and their live entertainmentas they travel among the downtown festivities: 5:00-6:00 PM. Gallivan Center we 6:00-7:00 PM ZCMI and Crossroads Malls ie 7:00-8:00 PM Gateway Olympic Legacy Plaza Get afree candy cane from the Clauses alongtheir réute and enjoy the holiday spirit! Other Downtown Holiday Activities include: * Trim your grocery bill up to 70 percent with ‘Great Deals’ from Ken Roesbery, the Grocery Guru! + Find out what Utahns are buying with the Top 1/0 best sellers in books, music, videos and more. Outdoor & Recreation Guide 3 Gallivan Center-Dropby for ice skating, games and prizes throughout the night. Global Artwayswill be there at 7:00 PM with hands-onartforkids. af Shopping & Services Guide * Plan an adventure with help from the State Parks and National Parks and Forests directory. * From fishing to snow sports, you'll find information and supplies to get you where you wantto go. SeeMeier & Frank’s animated holiday windowsunveiled at 5:30 PM'and check out Crossroads Plaza’s new “SuspendedChristmas Garden.” Seethe premier of Gateway's new Olympic LegacyPlaza holiday fountain show at 7:00 PM. For moreinformation call 359-5118 gerowrozs we FM100 (Gf) Commonaliance Travel & Visitor Guide + Find the perfect place to stay, whether youre planning an overnight getaway or long-awaited skitrip. * Visitors and residentsalike will find everything they need to know about the state with the Visitor Guide. 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