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Show The Salt Lake Tribune OPINION Monday, December4, 2000 Al5 Can’t We Discuss This Election Without Becoming All Redin the Face? AUSTIN, Teo In ne our. study of PBBUPs (People Behaving Badly Under Pressure), we are witnessing some outstanding — and names ‘are being written down. Many prominent citizens are aboutto lose their certification as adults. Psychologists, anthropologists and sociologists are all taking notes madly as the Bad Behavior Fiesta Bowl continues. Here's an interesting example of how a D came to lose it completely because an R had only a loose grip. The Republican in question was Oklahoma Gov. FrankKeating, normally placid fellow, who was ona Sunday chat show defending his team. They had arrived atthe sore subject of the Republican riot at the Dade County Courthouse. it be noted that this has not been certified as a riot —so far, all we have is the appearance of a riot -by someseriously hyperventilating Republicans.) Keating sudderily blurted out that everything was fine until “the 27-inch-neck crowd” from Chicago showed up and convinced the commissioners to recount. Now, this was not a well-thought-out characterization, and it caused moderator Tony Snow to say, “Whoa, whoa, whoa.” ridiculous and slightly offensive charge to a grand, sweeping charge that takes us back to the American Revolution and puts the entire Republican Party (which didn't exist at the tire) on the wrong side of the MOLLYIVINS War for Independence. Another tragic example of PBBUP-ery. I am somewhatuneasy about the antidemocratic tenor ofthe Republican assault on the hand-counting process — a familiar staple of contested elections, normally Keating then began babbling, “These are Boss Crump, Boss Tweed and Boss Daley’s boys that camein from Chicago.” This preposterous statement in turn caused a Democratic viewer to begin a rant: “Of course, people like that don't greeted with acceptance all-round. You notice that Volusia County, which happens to be run by Republicans, managed its count calmly and expeditiously: Broward also did well, in addition to offering the entertaining performance by Judge Robert Rosenberg, the guy with the big magnifying glass. Counting ballots is not rocket science,rarely involves partisan judgment and can be witnessed by everyone. The R’s attack on the judiciary is an want to countall the votes. They never unpleasant argument, unpleasantly made. FORT WORTH STAR-TELEGRAM want to countall the votes. They've been trying to stop people from voting for 250 years. They don’t like the people, they don’t trust the people, and they never wanted democracy in the first place.” Now,notice that we have gone from a George W. Bush's absurd statement that it’s “the executive branch job to interpret the law” leaves one wondering how he can swear to uphold the Constitution when he doesn’t know what's in it. (Oneis painfully reminded of Dean Page Keeton's letter explaining the law sci.ool’s rejection of George W.: “I am sure there is a place for young George Bush somewhere. However, in light of his grades on the LSAT exams, thatplace is not the School of Law at the University of Texas.”) You would think no R hadeverheard ofthe constant problems with punch-card voting, even though they've beenlitigated for 30 years. And whyis it astonishing or even odd that there are 6% (OK, the half is-odd) Democrats on the Florida Supreme Court? There are nine Republicans on the Texas SupremeCourt, and what’s worse, unlike the case in Florida they're elected in partisan campaigns thatare largely funded by the tort-reform lobby. I mayfind a few of them appalling, but it never occurred to me that there was anything illegitimate abouttheir interpreting the law. According to sources attending the party for the Texas Book Festival on Nov. 10, Bush was visibly furious and agitated and repeatedly said that the D’s were stealing the election. This agitation may account for someof his improbablestatements — I especially liked his contention that “the court cloaked its ruling in legalistic language” — but soonerorlater we are going to have to consider the PBBUP factor in Bush’scase.It’s just a contested election. It’s a big one, but that’sall it is. Television, ‘of course, is being highly unhelpful — not so much on account-of partisanship one way or the other but because of the medium’s incurable tendency test tempers, the most outrageous hyper- bole, who incite and inflame everyone, does nothelp illuminate the issues. When you invite Rep. Bob Barr or Rep. Steve Buyeror the Rev. Al Sharpton on the air, you knowperfectly well that you will get more heatthan light. Keep this up and we're going to have a whole country full of people who cannot discuss whatis indeed a very close and exciting election without becomingall red in the face, the tendons in their necks popping out and their wattles shaking like a turkey gobbler’s. I'm not worried about civil war — I’m concerned about people stroking out over this. Please recall from the Late Unpleasantness that the statement “I feel more passionately aboutthis than you do” may be fact,butit is not an argument. Katherine Harris’ Announcement Set Off a Case of Premature Exultation A week ago Sunday, a woman named Katherine Harris appeared on the a's the presidential seal. SANDY GRADY The Bush campaign’s act has always “TV screens and proclaimed George Bushto be the next presidentofthe United been to behave as the invincible. 2000 winner — an image Dubyaplayed to the hilt Sunday night. In effect, he told Gore: Bug out. “Lrespectfully ask the vice-president to States. Sorry, Madame Harris, not yet. When the lacquered Florida secretary of state, who all but wears a Bush cam‘paign button; certified Dubya the winner of her state’s 25 electoral votes, Bushies from Austin, Texas,to Tallahassee,Fla., to Washington,D.C., screamed with joy. It was a case of premature exultation, Inan amazing showofchuztpah, George Bush two hours later went on the tube to crown himself the 2000 winner. “We will now prepare to serveas president and vice president,” Bush said of himselfand Dick Cheney. Notso fast, Dubya. You don’t yet own the keysto Air Force Oneyet. Despite the ceremonial,possibly tainted © crowning of Bushin Florida, this most ex- traordinary post-election chaos in 133 years will tumble through the courts another week —maybe to Dec.12 and beyond. In an incredible poker game with the White House at stake, Bushtried to grab the pot and run while Al Gore yelled, “Keep dealing.” For the moment, the reconsider,” Bush said of Gore’s Florida fight. “Now that the votes are certified, PHILADELPHIA DAILY NEWS weary country’s willing to let the jokers- wild gameplayout, What’s the rush? Welive through weeks of hype to pick winners in the Olympics, pro baseball, football and basketball playoffs and that “Survivor” TV charade. With the legitimacy of the presidency ontheline, why notfidget a few more days through the War of One Thousand Lawyers? Sure, give Bush a fragile edge in num- bers (537 votes out of Florida's 6 million), powerful pictures of his coronation by DameHarris and his presumptive grab of he'd be contesting the outcome of the election.” But that smacked of self-righteousness. If their roles were reversed in the razorthin Florida vote, would Bush & Co. be clawing tooth-and-nail to extend.the process? Youbet. With breath-taking arrogance, Bush Security and cutting taxes, seemed under the illusion he was standing on the U.S. Capitol steps Jan. 20 with his hand on the Bible. The Bush & Co. gambit mimics the policy advocated for the Vietnam blunder gave Gore breathing room when in he mighthave beenfatally cornered. While Bushwas all but hiring a band to tootle “Hail to the Chief,” Gore is not Washington.” That means Cheney would call Bill without cardsto play in this showdown of public opinionandcourts. Clinton to demand, “We're in charge now First, Gore has Democrats, even those who once wavered, solidly behind him in his political life-and-death battle. From said he was assigning Cheney and his newly appointed Chief of Staff Andrew to “open the transition —unlockthat 90,000-square-foottransition office so we can start handingoutjobs.” Myhunch is that Clinton would laugh, “Sorry, Dick, I'll be busy playing golf the next couple of weeks.” Bush, whorattled off his presidential goals of education, reforming Social Capitol Hill leaders Tom Daschle and Dick Gephardt to party elders Jimmy Carter and Bob Strauss to county chairmen, Dems havesignaled Gore they'll stick with him. SHOP SPECIAL HOURS TODAY 9:30 A.M. TO 9:30 P.M. : « ya Orig. 69,00. Shop Monday-Fiirkday 9:30-9:30, Saturday and Sunda 11-7 at all Dillard's locations. tn Salt Lake City: Fashion Place and South Towne Cente’. in : Newgate Mail. We welcome your Dillard's Credit Card, The American Express® Card, Diners Club inte mational, Mastercard? Visa® and The Discover Card, \ War: “Declare victory and go home.” So they trotted out Senate leader Trent Lott to muscle Gore into waving the white flag. Their chief Svengali, James Baker,loftily declared,“There mustbe closure.It's time for the lawyers to go home.” Baker was shameless in his hypocrisy — afterall, it’s Bush’s lawyers who sang the blues until the Supreme Court agreed to hear their case Friday. That tactical \ “What's snother weekin the life ofthe Republic?” said former New York Gov. Mario Cuomoenigmatically,“It’s a peanut in the batterofeternity.” Second, Gore has strong arguments that the Florida results were manipulated, if notto blatantly “steal”the election, at least to tilt the recount Bush’s way. Secretary ofState Harris will be vilified . as a Bush lackey with Tammy. Baker's makeup and Marie Antoinette’s Laas ty. She cut the heart out of Palm Beach County’s bone-tired vote counters, not giving them until Monday 9 a.m.to finish, thentossing out their incomplete recount. Gore’s Microsoft-slaying lawyer David Boies will scrap to get Palm Beach votes reinstated and Miami-Dade’s 10,000 uncounted votes tallied. As Democrat No. 2 Joe Lieberman said of the fuzzy Florida math:“It is an incomplete and inaccurate count.” Concede? Nothardly. Butit’s to Al to make his case for national patience.Ifhe were behind 537 votes, you'd hear Bush make the samespiel. eet, Bush preens in his Oval Office mod Clam up, Dubya. You're not Martin Sheenyet. |
