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Show The Salt Lake Tribune UTAH/NATION Friday, March 3, 2000 All Gay MormonKills Self on Church Steps California man had expressed anguish over anti-gay-marriage Proposition 22 BY DANIEGANand andMICHAEL VIGH THE SALT LAKETRIBUNE A gayCalifornia man’s suicide on the steps of a Mormon church has come at the peak of a raging debate over gaycivil rights in the nation’s most populous state. “Imagine having to live with this rhetoric constantly being spewed at you. ofa Mormon church in Los Altos in the early hours of Feb.25. The suicide occurred less than two weeks before Voters will decide on California’s controversial Prop- sition 22, which states that only heterosexual marriages can be recognized legallyin that state. eT erea a) with Skin Choose two and a bonusfor you! Stuart Matis Police say Stuart Matis, 32, a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Santa Clara, Calif., shot himself with a handgun on the steps SHISEIDO Ina letter written three days before suicide ae Sr aeLUE eCay emeruePa) PMc ei raeeee two decades, I traveled down a tortuous path ofinternalized homophobia, immense self-hatred, depression and suicidal thoughts. Despite the calluses on my Matis’ parentssaytheir son’s suicide had nothing to do with the fiercely debatedinitiative, which is sup- knees, frequent trips to the temple,fasts and devotion to my mission and church callings such as Elders’ Quorum president, I continuallyfailed to attenuate my ported by a number of religious organizations, in- homosexuality,” Matis wrote. “ eeakg EUUre tiemal Bete esUtd I read a recent cluding the LDSand Catholic Churches. “Addingto the tragedyofthe event, there are those who would create political ramifications from this,” the familysaid in a statement. “The familysincerely letter to the editor with great regret. The author com pared my friends and me to murderers, satanists, prostitutes and pedophiles. Imagine having tolive with this rhetoric constantly being spewedat you.” requests that the exemplarylife of this good and wellrespected young man not become fodder for anyone's campaign forum.” It is this and other recent statements that have ue RUC em rEeee convinced anti-Proposition 22 activist Jeanie Mortensen-Besamothe issue “was just ripping him apart” during Matis’ last days. She said it wasn’t necessarily the political cam paignbut a culture of homophobia that troubled Matis Peaceete] eeURNReg signature mini-tote. Santa Clara police said a suicide note madeno reference to either Matis’ Mormonfaith or the controversy around Proposition 22, but “he felt there was a conflict between Christianity and the gaylifestyle,” said Santa Clara Police Sgt. Anton Morec. “He said he had been in painfor a numberofyears.” In thesuicide note read at a Wednesday memorial Service in California for Matis, he said he hoped some good would comefrom his death. “I am nowfree,” the San Francisco Examiner reported Matis wrote. “I am no longer in pain and I no longer hate myself. Asit turns out, God neverintended for me to be straight. Perhaps my death might become the catalyst for somegood.” While Matis’ parents say there is no connection between their son's death and Proposition 22, Matis staunchly opposed theinitiative, writing recentlytoa family member aboutthe pain he suffered because of the LDS Church’s support. California churchleaders have embarked on a campaign fund-raising drive, and letters have been read during Sunday services urging members to vote March 7 in favor of the proposition, also knownasthe KnightInitiative. “On the night of March 7th, many California coupleswill retire to their beds thrilled that they helped pass the Knight Initiative,” Matis wrote to a cousin. “Whatthey don’t realizeis that in the next room,their son or daughter is lying in bed crying and could very well one day be the victim of society’s homophobia. ‘The KnightInitiative will certainly save nofamily.It iscodified hatred. It is anti-family, anti-love andit is wrong.” On Feb. 22, three days before his suicide, Matis Wrote a letter to the student newspaper at Brigham Young University, from which he graduated in 1994, urging students to harbor more tolerance toward gays. “I am gay. 1am also LDS.I realized the significance of my sexuality when I was around 13, andfor the next Ce RUCae CTL RP erome so much, Crul ce “Tt's been so predominant in California for several months, You can’t go anywherein California without seeing those stupid blue and yellowsigns [in favor of EER UCRysaLLie Proposition 22],” said Mortensen-Besamo, who began Cass corresponding with Matis about a month ago. “For him, it was paralyzing. He couldn't handle it anymore.” A spokesmanfor the Yes 22 campaign declined commentother than to sa It’s a personal family matter.” LDS Church spokesman Michael Purdyexpressed condolencesto the Matis family, and also stressed the suicide should notbe exploited forpolitical purposes. “We are aware ofthe feelings and requests of the Matis family that their grief and personal tragedy not become a matter of public discussion or political posturing,” said Purdy. Gary Watts, co-chairman of Family Fellowship, a Utah support group for Mormon parents of gays and lesbians, called the suicide “verydistressing” and said an anti-gayclimateis a likely factor in Matis’ death. “Thereis little question that the environment in California has played a majorrole in his decision and his inability to cope with his homosexuality,” said 4 led nig Watts. Robert Rees, a family friend and spiritual counselor to Matis during thelast yearofhis life, says the root of Matis’ despairwill remain a mystery. “For somebody to make such an ultimatedecision, no one can knowwhat goes onin that person's mind,” said Rees, a retired professor at the University of California Los Angeles. Burial services for Matis are scheduled for today at lia.m. at the Orem City Cemetery. Ring sandal with dune | sole. Available in bark grizzly. "§ Whole ©! sizes 9-13M, 115.00. Fisherman sandal with dune sole. Available in H peanutgrizzly and bark grizzly. Whole WOMEN’S Double-stitch ~ sizes 9-13M, 110.00. Supplies UCM Tali re) * Watchselection § fisherman sandalwith yellowstitch sole. Available in black and © bark. Whole sizes 5-9M, 110.00. Open-toe * slide with @ buckle and yellow stitch sole. Available in rustic brown and black. Whole sizes § 5-9M, Shop Monday-Sat= 10-9 and wate 12-6 at all Dillard’ In Salt Lake City: Fashion Place and South Towne Center. 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