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Show THE FORUM - APRIL 18, 11 2012 on always complemented what I looked like. I was also 125 pounds, a healthy weight. Transferring to Westminster the following year was one of the best decisions of my life, or so I thought. Coming here I looked around, and I was no longer the skinniest girl. I was the fat one. I wasnt a size zero, and no one even looked at I personally would just lie and say I dont do anything and it just happens, or I would just say Im an athlete. No one ever knew. But the way to a healthy life starts with getting help. On campus there are many people you can talk to from the counselors to the school nurse or a trusted professor. You can also get help off campus, which is what Stokes and I both do. One great place in Utah is the Center of Change in Orem. They offer both inpropatient and and treatment. They grams and research with guide you allow you to face the harsh realities. Another great resource is talking to a therapist. Wendy Hoyt is out of Salt Lake City and does great work with eating disorders. If you want help, or know someone who needs help, speak up. It could save your life. me. You might say that it is ridiculous to say that no one looked at me, but most things with eating disorders can be considered ridiculous. I cant explain the things that even go through the minds of women with eating disorders. Soon after realizing I was the biggest girl out of all of my friends, and most of the girls in the state of Utah, let alone our campus, I stopped eating. Once again. It is the comments such I only as, Shes bigger, date girls smaller than me or that girl over there has the best body. Hearing comments from men on campus would always set me off even more. Everyone has that expectation that a girl needs to be super skinny to be beautiful. Many men would never admit to it, but when youre on campus, or at parties, and youre the girl that no one takes a second look at because youre a little bit bigger than the rest, it becomes tough. I lost a lot of relationships with friends, boyfriends, and some teachers, because I was never ready to admit what I had. It has taken me a few years to fully want help again. I go to a counselor and treatment, and I talk to people when I need help. Many people ask me where I have been, and why I stay away from campus so much, and this is the reason why. The pressures of trying to impress the popular kids on campus, having a lot of friends, going to all of the college parties, took a toll. And it was a risky, dangerous toll. Many people might think that I am completely fine now and healthy, but its a struggle every day. Its something that I will always have to live with and fight. Its scary to see someone who you love always refight with this. No one ally knows about it, or even out-patie- The nt Facts According to the Alliance for Eating Disorders Awareness: 91 percent of women surveyed on a college campus had attempted to control their weight through dieting. 22 percent dieted often or always. The average woman Devin Lane at one ofher lowest weights in high cares. As long as youre skinny thats the only thing people really think about, says Hailie Lane, my little sister. Jennis Story Jenni Stokes is an alumna of Westminster, and she too struggled with an eating disorder while at Westminster. The pressure of looking good and always needing to please people is hard. Its not easy, and no guy will ever recognize it here because its the norm, says Stokes. Stokes said that while she was here, she noticed that all of the girls were always dressed up, making sure they always looked good. The most noticeable thing was their size. Everyone was that size zero, size two figure, and is 5 4 and weighs 140 school. that was the size the guys went for. I got more compliments when I was 95 pounds than I ever did, she said. When I was that small I dated a lot of the soccer players and would hangout with them a lot, but once I put on ten pounds, no one wanted anything to do with me anymore, she said. It had gotten to the point for Stokes where she had to take a few years off of school to get healthy again. I realized in that time off that being on this campus was one of the worst things for me because everyone is so small, and expects you to be that small. I go anywhere else and people tell me to gain weight, or they tell me I look good the way I am. One thing Stokes says will stay with her was when one of her guy friends said Will you gain some damn weight Stokes. pounds. The average model is 51T and j It was what I needed, she said. Those words were her wake up call. Stokes has since gradu- ated and works on staying healthy with treatment and talking to people. , - t Getting help Getting help is ) not easy. When you have an eating disorder you never want to admit it. Stokes said when people would ask her how she stays so thin, she would lie and say she just took on healthy eating or working out. weighs 117 pounds. Most fashion models are thinner than 98 percent of American women. Five to ten percent of anorexics die within ten years of onset, 0 percent die within 18-2- twenty years of onset, and only 50 percent report ever being cured. I f ! f Up to 19 percent of college aged women in America are bulimic. -- 18 - |