OCR Text |
Show THE RICH COUNTY REAPER, RANDOLPH, UTAH Experienced Smith was watching the local hockey team getting ready. At the last minute it was found that the referee was missing. I say, shouted one of the players to Smith, do you know enough about hockey to referee? I know enough about hockey, replied Smith, not to referee! Trying Isnt Enough Candidate I want to assure you, fellow citizens, that I have constantly labored in your behalf to the best of my ability. Heckler We know it Thats why we want someone with more ability. YOUNG CRITIC By Ernie Bushmiller NANCY The young playwright was complaining to the famous producer that son had torn up his the manuscript of his newest play. Ah," mused the producer, the child can read. three-year-ol- d Noisy Neighbors Tenant The people upstairs are very annoying. Last Monday they were stamping and banging on the floor till after midnight. Landlord Did they wake you? No, I was practicing on , Tenant my tuba. Fair Warning Visitor My dear, these cakes are hard as stone. Second Visitor I know. Didnt you hear the hostess say, Take your pick." First Bv Bud Fisher MUTT AND JEFF HEY MUTT MUTT AND JEFF WELL, IN THE FIRST PICTURE DID you READ COMIC STRIPS LITTLE JEFF COMES IN AND SAYSHEX MUTT DID YOU THg MUTT JEFF NO! READ THE MUTT AND COMIC STRIP IN sJEFF COMIC STRIP TODAYSLPAPER?, in today's paper?. (qr THEN MUTT JEFF COMIC STRIP? THEN JEFF SAYS, "WELL, IN THE FlfeST PICTURE LITTLE , JEFF COMES IN AND SAYS 'HEY. MUTT DID YOU READJ THE MUTT AND JEFF COMIC IN TODAYS -- THEN YO,U STRIP PAPER?' SEE A CLOSE-U- P k OF LITTLE JEFF. AND INTHE LAST PICTURE JEFF IS ON THE FLOOR WITH A BLACK EYE -- WHICH MUTT GAVE HIM! BUT HE DOESNT MIND T AT ALL HES A GOOD-NATURE- HES 600DJ D LITTLE jsuy I T-- r rrTC Character Builder Football Coach (to players) And remember that football develops individuality, initiative and leadership. Mi LITTLE REGGIE They All Want It said the ambitious last, I have written young novelist, will be accepted by that something the first magazine it is sent to. What is it? asked his friend. A check for a years subscription. At By Margarita WHY TAKE HARSH LAXATIVES? Healthful Fresh Fruit Drink Makes Purgatives Unnecessary for Most People JITTER By Arthur Pointer Heres a way to overcome constipation without harsh laxatives. Drink, juice of 1 Sunkist Lemon in a glass of water first thing on arising. Most people find this all they need Stimulates normal bowel action day after day! Lemon and water is good for you. Lemons are among the richest sources of vitamin C, which combats fatigue, helps resist colds and infections. They supply valuable amounts of vitamins Bi and P. They pep up appetite. They alkalinize, aid digestion. Lemon and water has a fresh tang ars the mouth, wakes you up, starts you going. Try this grand wake-u- p drink 10 mornings. See if it doesnt help you ! Use California Sunkist Lemons. too-cle- , REGLAR FELLERS By Gene Byrnes PUB MSOiNT liass CviAS-i- o Dont let the embarrassing, VIRGIL By Len Kleis agonizing tortures of simple piles threaten your job, or rob you of your fun when youre at play. Now you can get quick, safe, easy relief from itching, burning and other painful tortures of simple hemorrhoids even when youre away from the privacy of your home! Thousands of pile sufferers use and praise handy, convenient Stuart's Pyramid Suppositories. Easy to use, easy to carry, easy to insert. Act instantly. Antiseptic, soothing medication reduces strain, helps tighten and draw up flabby membranes, gently lubricates and softens dry, hardened parts. Helps promote healing. Two sizes 60c and $1.20 with makers money-bacguarantee. k Get your genuine Stuarts Pyramid Suppositories at your drug store today. |