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Show IACTTE LALLAPOLOOSA 83 By SALLY LLOYD McCJur Newspaper 8odlcats, WNU Service. have gotta he valet to these potatoes and parsnips?" asked Ia Graham Indignantly, as he rolled up his sleeves and reached for a vegetable knife. "I'm gettln' klnda sick of bathing onions and massaging carrots. When's that hired girl due to show up?" I have three coming tonight for answered Mrs. GraInterviews, If any one of them looks ham. promising Ill take her. There was one here this afternoon a flighty looking young thing. That's the trouble with you," Ia, earnestly, "you Interrupted won't hire a girl unless she has a map on her like the outlines of the Bulkan states and a hand like a home-cureham. Let a good lookin girl apply for a Job and you wont give her a look In. I guess youre not takin any chances of loslu' me, eh, Ma? If you're so smart, suppose you hire the next nmld. You think you know so much about girls that I'm willing to let you put your Ideas Into practice. Y'ou may look over these maids that I'm expecting tonight, If you like, said Mrs. Graham coldly. Ill take you, cried Pa with enAnd I bet I'll get a thusiasm. good one. I'll pick a lnllapoloosa that wont give a feller a wart on the eyeball to look ah Ma opened her mouth and closed It several times In rapid succession. Then she sniffed audibly. You go ahead," she retorted But let me tell you that tartly. this lallupoloosa of yours will have to know how to work. I have enough ornaments around the house now without adding another to my collection." Y'ou leave this to me," said Pa, Ma, you Just leave this easily; to me. Thus it happened that he sat In the living room an hour later with the three applicants from the domestic agency facing him. He Immediately eliminated the oldish one with the big black boots as being heavy and decidedly The second woman was a and practiced her vice openly and audibly. Her jaws met with a smacking crunch that caused the hair on the back of Pas neck to sit up In protest But the third girl was certainly a lnllapoloosa neat, rather small, with big dark eyes and dazzling teeth. She smiled often. Her name she said was Teresa Colardo. Yes, she knew how to cook she could do anything around a houve, in fact. Her references? She produced several letters from a beaded bag that lay in her lap. Pa hired her on the sp it. OW long 1 d high-lace- gum-crack- Then Ill come Bolrs For Graduation, Party and Prom THE . AMERICAN. LOGAN. UTAII tomorrow slit said ns she followed her tw i com Pa nodded panions to the door. and patted her on the shoulder. cant hire all three of Sorry you." he said. The big black hoots and the gum cracker turned on him simnltane ottsly. If looks could cremate Pa would have been a little heap of ashes on the hall rug. Go chase yourself, said the r tersely as she slammed the door. The wind left Pas sails for a mo ment, but he soon regained his nat nral buoyancy. Ma," he called. Believe me, I picked a lnllapoloosa this time. Youre gonna have a girl worth hirin' from now on. Humph! sniffed Ma, ndtally. But ns the weeks passed- - Mrs. Graham could find no fault with Teresa. She was a super maid Her cooking was something to make one's mouth water and her manner of serving was faultless. She was neat, willing, honest, A sort of human paragon. I picked her out," Pa would on say when friends eommenled Teresas good qualities. "I knew the minute I looked nt her that she was a lallapolonsa ! There was Just one small fly in the domestic ointment a fly so small that one could easily refer to It as a gnat Teresa had many admirers, all of whom scented to have the uppetlles of healthy, snakes. Consequently the Gra ham cupboard was always licked as hare as Mrs. Hubbards well known refrigerator. "I had company last night. Teresa would admit, when ques tioned as to the disappearance of a barely nicked leg of lamb, half a custard pie and various and sun dry vegetables. Oh, did yon? asked Ma darkI thought ly. perhaps a flock of seven-yea- r locusts had been pt loose In the pantry. Well, I hope they enoyed their lunch. Y'esm, answered Teresa meekly She was never sanev. The Grahams grew accustomed to seeing a J'irkshnlow flit past the living room window nn Its wav to the kitchen. Then they would hear thp voice of Teresa mingled with a man's tones. Soon the door would click 1 Mm would sujr rather grimly: She must have a dozen on the string. I feel as though I were running a free soup kitchen or a breud line or aometblng." ByCHERIE Now, Ma," Interpolated Pa, soothingly, jou were young once jour-self- . If 1 remember rightly the steps to your Ius front door got kind of worn down In the middle when you were Teresa's age. I'll bet theres s dozen fellows stuck on thut little lullupaloosa. Girls will be girls." They paid no particular attention to the shadow of a tall man that flitted across the living room window on the night of what Pa always referred to afterwards as "the rumpus." But when a second shadow followed awlftly on the heels of the first Mrs. Graham sat np and took notice, so to speak. 9 She doesnt usually feed more than one anaconda during an evei she to Pa. remarked ning," Before he had a chance to answer haul voices came from the kitchen. Then the crash of an overturned chair followed by Teresa' high screntn. "Them bottomless snakes must be devourin each other. muttered la as he shuffled kllehenvvard. lie wrenched open the kitchen door and then stood aghast at the spectacle of two men writhing and pumniellng each other on Teresa's Immaculate kitchen floor. Git up. you toads, yelled Pa, kicking one of the combatants In the ribs. FRESH and young and The fellow who had felt Pa's toe unspoiled, the sweet in his side Jumped nngrlly to his girl graduate Is the star of her commencement feet Ill show you," he shouted. You week and must be costumed daintily and loveold moss face! Y'ou old caterpilly as can be for her part She must lar! also plan for the commencement And he sent pa spinning across Being wise, as her diploma parties. the floor. declares her to be, she will choose Suddenly thp other figure sprang a graduation frock that will be apto Ills feet with catlike swiftness. propriate for evening wear right He drew a revolver from his pocket through the summer. and flourished It In the air. Some of the most entrancing Ill teach you to double cross frocks are of Swiss orme," he screamed at Teresa, who gandie. Romantic, youthful and flatwus cowering In thp corner of the tering, these sterling, exquisitely kitchen. Ill teach yon to have sheer cottons come In endless variTommy up for a big feed tonight ety. Embroidered organdies are Imand Dickie tomorrow night and mensely popular this year. They Harry the night after. I'll teach are patterned In versatile fashion, you to feed all my friends Just beranging from flowing vine and floral cause Im not here to keep an eye motifs to demure also on you. They all boastin' about the novelty dot effects. Eyelet and cutout embroidered patterns swell eals they get when Im out are delicately lacy and have an of town! I'll show you. The dishpan fell to the floor with added crispness that Is refreshing a crash a bullet In Its bottom. and cool for summer wear. Flecked Swiss organdies are fascinating, too, A second shot tore a Jagged path dots and geometacross the wall over Teresa's head. with chenille-likapplied in colors or A third missed Pa's left ear by a ric patterns white on solid grounds. fraction of un inch. The new chic finished organdies Two policemen ami several alarmed neighbors rushed in through the are as sweet and dainty as the kitchen door and seized the ungry edelweiss flowers of their native land. These are so supple In finish man by the arms. During the babble of explanations, threats, and they drape beautifully and have a curses Teresa disappeared. When soft but noticeable luster that Is the hubbub had subsided a search inherent in the material and comes of her room showed that she had back faithfully after each tubbing and pressing. gone, hag and baggage. Miraculous, Indeed, are the new Exit the lallapoloosa, said Ma with an oblique glance at her crinkled and matelasse organdies that need only to he tubbed and spouse, la said nothing. Do jou want to interview the then put on a hanger to dry to reto their original freshness. In girl who is coming up from the turn domestic agency, or shall I see solid color or In multi color floral tier?" asked Mrs. Graham the next prims. Graduating frocks this year are day. full length, with smoothly fitting Iliutt!" sputtered Pa indignant"Have I ever shown any dispo- skirt flaring from the knee. Bely. sition to halt Into your affairs? cause of the youth of their wearers Whatd I want to see her for? Cant you tend to your end of things? Get one with the smallpox for all ITS THE LATEST I care! Dr CilBRlE NICHOLAS dual-purpo- bow-kno- all-ov- e step toward understandway in which nerves make muscles contract or relax has been reported to the French Academy of Sciences, In Baris, by David Broun and Hermann Scheiner, says the Baltimore Sun. The action of nerves is known to be electric, consisting of repeated pulses of electricity not unlike those passed over a telephone wire. Muscular actions, however, are believed to be chemical. Bathed in one kind of chemical the muscle fibers contract, this chemical being believed by many physiologists to he the adrenalin manufactured by the adrenalin glands. Bathed In another and different chemical called acetylcholin, muscle fibers apparently relax. The mystery has been how electric impulses from the nerves might translate themselves into chemical charges to set free adrenalin when muscles should contract and acetylcholin when they should relax. This missing link In understanding the process is what Bioun and Scheiner believe they have supplied. Their experiments show that In certain samples of blood liquid acetylcholin Is present but has no effect on muscle fibers. As little as two drops of alkull turn these inactive liquids into active ones. The theory Is that supplies of both the relaxing and the contracting chemicals are present all the time in muscle fibers or In the blood, but are kept In storage by loose chemical combinations. Electric currents from the nerves change this hy producing either a little acid nr a little alkali, which it Is known that plectricltv cun do If the nerves set free acid, that re leases one chemical and (lie must In If alkali is pro libers contract. dneed, (he o'lier (hcniical is sc free and llie libers reliv. A ing non-co- lee-bo- t pavi5;j Evil J? X . r;V v 1 . new J i K'v by d cot surrounded by a handful of the faithful, he writhed Into the everlasting shadows addressing the mirage of his army. This man of destiny emits! Ills earthly career In a welter of fut, Ills ankles bulging over patent leather shoes like something spilling into space . . . The Jowls of him fell Into a sidled collar, open at the throat, disclosing the Ivory pulp of a flabby breast housing a heart that for twenty years had set the tempo for victorious cannonading under the banners of France. volumes writ'Twenty thoti-nn- d ten In every living tongue flowed for more Ilian a hundred years from the Impetuous pens of biographers, ruled to lay hare the life of the Corsican horn adventurer who lived to shake the world. From the eoufiislon wrought of countless pons, the fearsome Bonaparte now- stalks half monster; half god, an execrated and a deified personality, in j thologized with the accumulating years, and all that Is germane to his Influence upon the Nineteenth century, is swept Into historical disorder. Biography Written by Ear. Unfortunate, indeed, that history is not clarified by time. Once an error creeps Into (lie record It remains there forever, modified at Intervals hut never wholly corrected for the enlightenment of posterity. Memoirs are equally noxious, not for what they present, hut for what Most biography Is they withhold. w ritten In the measure of one grand sweet song whistled hv an Idiot who has no ear for music. Recently In Washington a conscientious attempt was made by a congressman and an artist to contrive a mural decoration that would show Just bow our colonial statesmen looked when properly garbed In the stjle of that period; nothing, y'understand, built along quantity production lines or shot with shoddy, but the cracker-Ijarhandmade breeches, and waistcoat of the James Madison, Ben Franklin and Aaron l'.urr school, showing George Washing ton In profile and Alexander II, nail ton from the front elevation. Fair enough, and a knockout, so I understood. But has anv thing been done to i li ar up some of the i xaggv i, idol's, in.n cuiaues and dirty cracks- taken at George and Alex? Not long ago I puked np a hook that ihalt In part with that iliapfor In the life of Bonnie Piirne Charlie, who was rescued from Biitlsh pursuers in the Isle of Skve In the heroine Flora MacDonald after the battle of Ciilloden, which rang down the curtain of To kingly ambitions. quote: Story of Royal Romance. It seems to have been his (Charlies) thought that If she (Flora) cared for him that the two might well love; and he gave her every chance to show him favor. The and the girl jouth of twenty-fivof twenty-fou- r roamed together In the long, tufted grass, or lay In the sunshine and looked out over the sea. But to the last he was either too high or too low for her, accoid ing to her own modest thought . . Well, there It is, offered as history. Last year I spent a month In the Isle of Skye, snooping into that affair, variously distorted by writers totally ignorant of the truth. The , facts are these: Following Emmie Charlie took it on the run wish a 30,000 reward on his curly head. Loyal Highlanders, a mere handful, escorted him through the rain swept barren hills, keeping him concealed under cover of night. Flora, true blue, unimpeachable and courageous, was selected bj Charlies escort to get the prince otj( of his difficulties. She agreed to take the risk and set about her arrangements to get him to a point of safety disguised as her maid. Myth Is Debunked. After ten days of breath-takinadveutiue, Flora, bossing the entire Job, succeeded in her mission, and on the night of July 1, 174G, in the presence of Highland gentlemen, one of them a relative of Flora, the Bonnie Prince bade her a respectIn Room able unemotional good-b5 of Roval hotel at Portree, climbed out of the window and escaped in the boat that her efforts had provided. The actual time consumed In the plot for his flight was ten days, (luring five of which Flora never set eyes upon the prince. During the five remaining days she saw him three times, always In the companv of his Highland henchB dn and cold weather premen. vailed. Not once was the rescuer of the apless nobleman alone in self-cons- and because the style Interest Is centered on the unusual fabric patterns, the frocks are always simple In line. Distinctive details are chic fly away sleeves, always perky and crisp in organdie, a restrained use of demure ruffles, and as a rule, modest high necks. The lovely models pictured have flaring skirts that will lilt blithely to the platform at the graduation exercises and appear later on at Informal dances and dinners throughout the summer. Slim sheathes of taffeta make a sleek foundation with an elegant whisper of silk. Taffeta Is also being used In a revival of the traditional sash with butterfly bow nnd long ends as Instanced In the youthnl frock of eyelet embroidered Swiss organdie to the right In the trio. Just as the tradition of white for brides Is no longer uniformly observed, pastel colors or touches of color on white have become os correct for graduation as maiden YVherefore, the flower-llkpictured to the left will go tripping demurely up the aisle in a The brief organdie. bolero Jacket has fly away, pleated shoulder-wideninsleeves to enhance Its chic and Its charm. Of course you have fallen In love at first sight with the beguiling dress, centered in the picture. Everybody dees. A diseieet ami artful use of ruffles adds to the quaint but very modi-d- i air of this sumof mery frock which is Swiss organdie. The red grosgrain ribbon tie at the throat and a red grosgrain holt match the color of the fabric dots. e d Western Newspaper Union. STRIKING BUTTONS ADD BRIGHT TOUCH mother-of-pea- rl Canine Heads Are Used to Trim Various Accessories The feminine population of Baris has gone dog minded and canine heads trim everything from sports scarves and handkerchiefs to belt terriers and fastenings. Scotties remain popular favorites and their heads, In black and white composition material, make decorative belt buckles which match smaller editions used as buttons. Pairs of wire haired terriers and Scotties are suspended on leather chains from leather bracelets and are matched by fobs worn in the lapel of a spring sports suit. These fobs are made like dog leashes with the dngg attached to braided, colored leather chains. Wire-haire- - L. VcxCfrx PATTERN J 115J Dark and light lilacs, tied with a flourish Into the loveliest of florul sprays. Is far and away the nicest and easiest flowery touch one ran give a bedroom. Even an amateur will find the large spray easy to embroider on a bedspread with four smaller sprays on the bolster, or scarf ends. The flowers are entirely formed of stitch nnd French knots, the leaves of blanket stitch the rest Is In outline. With cotton or rayon floss the designs are seemingly done In no time. In shades of lilac, orchid, or palest yellow. Pattern 1152 conies to you with s transfer pattern of a motif IS by 21 Inches and two reverse motifs 4 hy 5(4 inches. Color suggestions; Illustrations of all stitches needed; material requirements. Send 15 cents In coins or stamps (coins preferred) to The Sewing Circle, Needlecraft Dept., 82 Eighth Ave., New York, N. Y. Write plainly pattern number, your nnme and address. luzy-dnls- Minister Son Invents Invisible Ear Drum The Invisible Ear Drum Invented by A. O. Leonard, a son of the late Freedom of Key. A. B. Leonard, D.D., for many YVho, then, Is free? The wise man Forof Board of the secretary years himself. Horace. eign Missions of the Methodist Epis- who can govern copal Church, for his own relief from extreme deafness and head noises, has so greatly Improved his hearing that he can Join In any ordinary conversation, go to the theatre and hear without difficulty. Inexpensive and has proved a blessing to many people. Write for booklet to A. O. Leonard, Inc., Suite ,209, 70 Fifth avenue, New York city. Advt Do Self-Contr- We? The Eskimo use his harpoon not to kill but to retrieve game. k - Real Flower Fan A lovely and unusual fan carried at an evening affair in Paris was made of living ferns and orchids set in a tortoise shell frame. Obi Sash black satin old sasli printed with large white birds is an in, cresting accessory to a hlaik or white evening gown. Beaded Necklaces de as coBeaded necklaces as ef collars llars and takng the pi: are increasing m importance and his succ'y. desirability. Curlght vv V hu-k- in Here Is a coat and dress that Is a arrival, so new that Its newness almost startles. It has that modish broad shoulder line which is essential If you would be up and going In fashion. Great emphasis Is given to color alliance in The dress this model by Creed. has a front of green, brown and red madras. The three quarter length coat Is made of beige and brown wool as Is also the dress. The coat fastens with a wide chamois gray belt. The hut Is gray fell. A the Dead ink-stain- Many striking Ideas are being developed In the button line. For sport blouses, a clever manufacturer uses numbers to replace ordinary buttons down the front. These, ranging from one to nine, are of plastic material, sometimes In bright color to form a contrasting effect against the blouse fabric or else in imitation ivory, tortoise shell or delicate, pule amber. The signs of the Zodiac also have been a source of Inspiration for button designers and have been used with great originality by leading dressmakers for summer afternoon or beach dresses. The Chinese Inspiration has been responsible for one style showing Chinese script engraved over discs or plastic plaquettes in lacquer red. the mysterious Done Writer of Hittory. Napoleon remarked, WHEN history is a lie," he launched a mouthful. The Little Corporal must have sensed what he was to suffer at the hands of his biographers, those harpies who marked time against the hour his star fell at St. Helena where, on a fruit army pie-eje- Doctors Say Electricity Makes the Muscles Work Oo-ho- NICHOLAS Bedspreads Welcome Delicate Lilac Motif c e Cullo-den- y NU Service. JOE E. BROWN ASKS BOYS AND GIRLS TO JOIN CLUB Famous Comedian Offers 36 Join JOE E. BROWNS CLUB. Youll get the membership pin shown here and the Club Manual telling how to work up to higher ranks and how to get Joes valuable prizes free. Send your name Flakes Grape-Nut- s and address, and one Flakes, Battle Creek, package top to Grape-Nut- s Michigan. Good, nourishing food FLAKES sure like GRAPE-NUTfor is the right kind of eatia everybody. Why, GRAPE-NUTFLAKES, with whole milk or cream and fruit, actually provide more varied nourishment than many a hearty meall And are they good! (This offer expires December 31, 1936. Good only in U. S. A.) A Post Oreal mads by General Fooda SEE JOE E. BROWN'S LATEST MOTION PICTURE I Club Membership P- IGold finish with blue letter, actual sue shown. Free for 1 s Flakes pack-ag- e top Photo of Joe E. Brown Joe greets you with a big Grape-Nut- smile in this facsimile autographed photograph. Free J S S Prizes FREE good-looki- for 1 Grape-Nut- s Flakes ckage top. Flakes Joa E. Brown, Gram-Nut- s Battle Creek Mich. Flakes package topa. Please send Grape-Nut- s I enclose me free the items checked below: Membership Pin nd Club Manual. (Send I P.clrage Top.) P Photo of Joe E. Brown. (Send 1 Package Top.) SONS O GUNS A WARNER Sfafa BROTHERS PICTUREI |