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Show 2 1 THE DAILY UTAH CHRONICLE Tin rm;av. Mam h C. 2KH BELLAMY RED asking you to write in "Cool-LookiKen" for is n' EXTRASMODELS HEEDED. No ipr,-n- t Cail neceisar1 Earn up to lor imrrJiTe ooiuft I 883 620 0'64 MOVIES no 1184. PHONE tt 0621 ji WORK FROM HOME, no 800. mental income, 5200 Oieq 656 very fle 0le 5 10 ASUU president. hrk. Visit Easy iuspie Only takmq 1 po-cu- www.red-mag.co- m for more info. e RENTAL ACENT. Ne to Real or interested in pursuing a real estate ca feer7 otah $ only FftEE, tuil iervrce rental tmdinq erice. frentjifinderi Dii is openinq a 2nd ofmo. income potential! Great casri fice1 $4000 Car required. Call Vic 9'.8 900. tlo REAL ESTATE SALESPEOPLE: Make CalU for a la firm Part Call time job while you qo to school. today. TELEMARKETING 20 hrwH teiemarketmq positor hiqrvvoiume tion. outbound Responsible calls. Experience mth Word. Excel, Outloon. and Excellent interpersonal and Goldmine a plus. communications skills, rVgh deqree ot professionalism and attention to detail. Execufram of Fax 801 359 7780, e mail: jobs-sal- t Utah. lake executrain com 317 "Nazi Germany and Mexico" STUDIES INTERNSHIPS. En joy the benefits of workmq on campus, flexible hours, and the opportunity to support academic proqrams throuqh this year-lonpaid internship. at 110 Sill Center or available Applications uqs utah mmm Questions? Call htm. Jennifer JAZZ MARKETING INTERNSHIP. Ticket Sales Representative, part time The Utah Jaiz tor want is looking students who sales experience in the sports and entertainment industry. It you have qood phone skills, sellinq ability, and an excitement for basketball- - we would love to have you' You'll make 58 00 an hour plus commission (515 00 an hour is our current average). You must be able to work Mon Fn. College credit may be available. To apply, send a resume to qensen utahja com UTAH WANTED WEB PROGRAMMER, we wll you dun t know Call 801 671 9405. WORK FROM Friedrich Katz Morton D. Hull Distinguished Service Professor Chairman of the Center for Mexican Studies teach what Legitimate international HOMEI University of Chicago company needs skilled supervisor. Training provided by personal coach 5500 S5000mo. www incredibtecash btz Thursday, March 6, 2003 If www. dail yuUihchronicIc. com doesn't "ROCK" you. 7:00 p.m. then w w w. r c d - m a g c o rn Utah Museum of Fine Arts . will. 1 ed t 1 I thin-skinn- a last year to check out another tennis tournament she wasn't participating in, though she did come as a spectator. Between matches, I went into town to pick up some "kruidenierswinkels" from the market when I saw her in the produce section. Our eyes met and it was lusL..er, love at first sight. Thoughts of my bedroom the posters on my wall, the 2003 collector's calendar, "Basic Elements: Anna K's Complete Fitness Video" flooded through me as I stood frozen, realizing that no snapshot had ever done her effervescent beauty justice. As she strutted toward mc, moving stylishly in slow motion with that seductive gaze, we were both struck with an impulsive urge to rip each others' clothes off. So we did much to the astonishment of other shoppers. The weeks and months that followed were nothing less than a fairy tale a edustudentinternindea. Deadline March 28. at 585 7254. glorious, if brief, period of time, the two of us were an item. And I promise you, she would never go for such a prima donna as Sergei Fedorov. It's a guy like me she was always truly looking for. I'm willing to tell the whole story of our sordid love affair but only at the right price. C'mon, who's buying? I won't go into too much detail, but I'll fill you in on the basic story. I know what you're thinking: "No way. What could a rich and beautiful superstar athlete possibly see in a penniless college student who wants to be gasp a That's right me. For writer?!" Well, to be perfectly honest, I think it was the hair. I was vacationing in Copenhagen UVSC is acceptinq applicaTUTORTRACKER tions for tutortrackers to work at West Hiqh Scnooi. Must be willing to commit until end of scnoo year. 5772hour. Call 578 8500 ext. UNDERGRADUATE continued from paqe 9 . - r 1 YORN " j LIVE ' t11 mi in will! mh, tlll I "ntmntulij.mmmmmu V GET 2 FREE TICKETS AND MELT PETE. t.li.v)-(;(- : iu : Oil Wireless wx' .wth .MM!' S AW Wireless dream within a dream. We traveled the romance and history of world, from-thParis, to the beauty and culture of Italy, to the vast landscapes of the Outback. We had a wedding in her hometown of Moscow and immediately set out on a long honeymoon on the beaches of Jamaica. This was happiness. This was bliss. On our wedding night and every night after, for that matter as sounds of bongo drums and the crash of Atlantic Ocean waves perforated through our window, we consummated our sacred union. And then we consummated it again. And again. And again. And again. Nothing could quell our insatiable appetites for one another. And before you ask yes, she is a natural blonde. Every morning, after we awoke from a short night's sleep, we would clear the kitchen table and make passionate, sweeL..um, pancakes. Honestly, it was rather strenuous. Didn't anyone ever wonder how she got her mysterious nagging back injury that kept her out of commission for so " long? Despite our intense passion, wc wanted to keep our relationship a secret from the press. After all, wc didn't want the paparazzi taking pictures of our torrid sex life. Seeing photos of a guy like mc with one of the world's sexiest women would be enough to make a man homicidally jealous. Plus, I really wasn't sure how well my parents would take the news. We kept the media guessing, starting absurd rumors about guys named Pavel and Enrique. But, as they say, all good things come to an end. My Anna eventually healed up and dropped a bombshell on me: She wanted to return to pro tennis. This came as a shock to me, since I wasn't even aware she played tennis. We tried to work things out, but in the end our time away from each other just got to be too much. Aside from her killer bod and luscious smile, after a while I felt like I didn't even know her anymore. And sadly, after just a few months of wedded bliss, we were divorced and we both moved on. So...do you believe me now? Well why not? Some of you believed Fedorov! My story, however farfetched, should be just as good as anyone else's, and just as valid as anything else the grapevine tells us about Anna Kournikova's private life. We've been given so many stories over the years, I just can't take much seriously anymore. We've heard that former boyfriend Pavel Bure got down on one knee in a public cafe and proposed to Kourniko-v- a and that she said yes. Wre were told that was "just a rumor," but when people saw a gaudy diamond ring on her finger, Anna made headlines again is the Bure marriage true? Or did she dump him and go running back to Sergei? (Don't you just love those soap opera names?) We read that once she started dating Enrique Iglesias, their rampant sex was so loud that the neighbors complained. And the wedding bell rumors began again (Anna Iglesias?). Hell, we even heard that Kournikova is still a virgin. The moral of the story: Don't believe the hype. And certainly don't believe Fedorov, Anna's most infamous when he says he married the of my dreams. Somehow I have a girl hard time believing two of the highest-profil- e athletes in the world could keep something as huge as a wedding a secret from the media. If Fedorov wants to delude himself, or just grab some attention or acclaim out of jealousy and bitterness, that's fine. But if he can get away with it, why can't I? Maybe (definitely) I am just jealous. Maybe (indubitably) I just don't want to believe it. Obviously, a guy like me has no chance with the world's most desirable mediocre athlete. All I can do is tell a wild story in a school publication to boost my ego, knowing full well I'd have a better chance with k.d. Lang. Oh welL.there's always Kirstcn Dunst. Chris at welcomes feedback ever-prese- nt SALT LAKE CITY 72) L 3.100 Soutn 301 SANDY 1064b S 801 495-026- Stalest. JORDAN LANDING 3758 W 7800 South 801 282-853- THE GATEWAY UNIVERSITY MALL SALT LAKE CITY 160 S. Rio Grande St. (Gatewav Protect) 801 456-030- 575 E. University Parkway (Suite A 21) 611 S. Mam St. 801 519-968- 2 801 426-582- monthly $1.75 Regulatory Program Fee will be added to your M for each line ol service to help lund AT&T Wireless compliance wilh various government mandated programs. This is not a la or a governmenl required charge lr 2003 AT4T Wireless All Rights Reserved Requires new activation on a qualified plan $33.D9 or above, credit approval, valid credit or debit card, a $36 activation fee. minimum one-yea- r agreement, compatible device and up lo a $175 cancellation tee Not available tor purchase or use in all areas. Usage is rounded up to the next lull minute. Unused monthly minute allowances lost Sending text messages, roaming, additional minute and long distance charges, universal connectivity charge, surcharges, other restrictions, charges and taxes apply. Availability and reliability of service are subject lo transmission limitations Not avarlabie with other otters. Otters available for a limited time. 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