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Show LEni FREE PRESS. LEHL UTAH aa OUR COMIC SECTION 0 Ereiits in the Lives Little Mat of OBT (6HT PACK. CHESTER, MINUTE. ANW BED THI$ INTO 5TAV THERE, POYflU HcAK mc. Dey do say dat op. aortunity knocks at every man's loot once in his life. Wandering Bill Well, this old train's making so darn much noise It If It did. (bit you couldn't hear Ribs Rusty THAT'S TELLING HER Sally Sez LIFE'S LITTLE JESTS S GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY The prosecuting counsel was having a little trouble with a rather difficult mitness. Exasperated by the man's evasive answers, be asked blm If be was acquainted with any of the Jury. "Vet, sir, more than half of them," replied the man In the box. "Are you willing to swear that you know more than half of themr asked counsel. "If It comes to that. I'm willing to swear that I know more thud all of em put together," came defiantly from the witness. Answers Magazine. . 'I P4 I eWt at It's ana to U aws "heck scat 4riW nUataka to Patronize bomb ikdubtbt HONK! HONK! s miimrm ' I THIS WEEK'S PRIZE STORY Spring-- la Just aroana' the earner eat with ktr ceaunc aii aatera caatce cat im brilliant, new array and mink ire e(a the na clean a p. atock no. ana drew en. Bur "lntcrmoantaia Made Geaet" for year sprinr canaairm and be assartd yea will get the east pradacla made. MRS. MAL'RINE C JENSEN, Fcrrea. ft. Fashionable Wife I'm Just a bird i gilded cage. Practical Friend If you had to ieep the gilding scrubbed and pol ished you woman t nave so much . time for idle fretting. B flaeat ol Wilts reaalrtag at prlcee that are reaaeaabla Friend Didn't you know get out of the way of an Victim No ; I'm not used Tou see I own one of the CAPITAL BRING A CUSHION PUNlSHMENH self. 1 V T REST HER. WHUT S 5Hc FOIND THAT Ol BE J, SLANDERlM' ME, SHE I ill vmu1-nh- uT im ucc mrvii wi-- . vw PEOPLE 0 DY&P TBLLlrJ' O' ME HAIR HfcW f aj j i i i f .v i a n . j' a a Tommy, come sit down and tell what happened at school today." "Er If It's Just the same to you, Mom, I'll stand up and tell you!" tt. i rn i Be I J DRAWN LINE IS J J? "ZA f T V-THA- I If you must, iJTEil'-- I m$Z? XV P Yoa but don't a sister to me." Pnt worry, Mr. Blunt. rally is very exclusive." you'll be ANY things my- i Finest Equip prd Watch Shop ia Utah 4t Wast Be. Teas. St. Salt Last City WE CAN MAKE ANT PART FOR A MODERN TIM It PIECE OK AN OLD ANTIQUE. All Work Caarantetd Prompt Service ANT WATCH WHETHER Boating Season Opens Soon "Metal Maid Built by Weight of Wo Tramp Lady, won't you help a poor man that lost his family In the Yorkshire flood and all his money In a crash? Housewife Why, you are the same man that lost a family In the South durWales flood and was ing the war. Tramp Yes, lady. I'm the unluck-les- t guy on the face of the earth. Pearson's Weekly. Mora Delightful Than Permanent Campaign Speaker Fellow citizens Ah er um, as I was about to remark, I believe that the generality of man In general Is disposed to take an undue advantage of the generality of Man In Audience You better sit down. You're coming out at the same hole you went In at Pathfinder Magazine. Playing Safe The hotel clerk was growing Impatient as the prospect took so long to read the names on the register. "Just sign on that line, please," said the clerk. The prospect was Indignant and retorted: "Young man, I'm too old a hand to sign anything without readin' Kansas City Star. Our BOY KNOWS Intermountain Champion Outboard Races Johnson Metal Works Boat Builders and Headquarters for Outboard Motors) New and Rebuilt All Makes JOHNSON METAL WORKS 1114 shell-shocke- d 7VEfprfwHATTriATSAID kL . ft GOTWAS yu 'Refuse me walking. A Bit of Lack yes," said Jones, "my wife speaks six languages, you know." "Well, I shouldn't worry, put In his friend. Jones stared searchlngly at him. "What do you mean by thatl" bo asked. His friend smiled back at htm. "Well, she can't speak more than one of them at a time, can she?" he replied. Answers Magazine. Dome Light By Ted O'Loujfclin e Sy W,.r. Kmnp, SNOOP PERSON HERE.' LOOKING- - PER HER f ( to "Oh, FINNEY OF THE FORCE Ol "THOUGHT Ol'D enough to auto? THE TIME SHOP ' Boolh BUte. Salt Lake City SALESMEN'S SAMPLE DRESSES NOW ON SALS REAL BARGAINS UTAH WOOLEN MILLS 9 Richards Street Anthropologists say that cutting; the hair does not make it grow thicker and that shaving does not make it grow coarser. LEARN BEAUTY CULTURE at the west's finest school. Call er write for free catalog. ftWM-fttllfca- ) BEAUTY SCHOOL Mala & Breadway Salt Lake City The first universities in the New World were founded simultaneous y in Lima, Peru, and in the City of Mexico, 1561. At 400 Utah Oil If THATS SOMETHING Refining Service Stations In Utah and Idahtf By THE FEATHERHEADS SauS- - nER AMD TALK To MR. KEN'MELL ABOUT To DOS OF HiS HE'LL HAVE GET RiD OF lT I'm Te an uncle elehtv vpnra he Is as frisky as a school Sot ltJ"4 school boy iug OUtY ' going to school in 1 . j ? No Barking Aloud 0born I -SO WANTED To rpcobp- To - I WtN I THE AUTHORITIES n ' for Farm Buildings Ask your Lumber Dealer V0 E OBECTiOM? i 1 "Has Brown ever had much of a hold on you?" "He succeeded In pulling my leg "DEAR, once." Voice t' the Mattes Uplifter Do you know that of the world doesn't know how the other half lives? Voice from the Rear It's a good :hing some people know enough to nind their own business. Kansas City Social Due-ha- lf b wimsii Star. mj n 1 kk S "BARKINO Co n-- -- J S3" I'M BUT THAT j ncAl LV C IT- I iTS A gAK CAe gNHIS THAN i i- v- - A BITE HAVE - OF HIS WORSE Rainproof Skeptical Miss Can this coat be worn out In the rain without hurting t? Fur Salesman Lady, did you ever $ee a skunk carry an umbrella? Out of Season "What 1 waut to do," said the economist, "Is to persuade our young people to stick to the farm." "It's a good idea," replied Farmei "hut it's out of season. Uorntossel, Come around when gettln' up at five t'clock In the morning ain't such cold ork." NO CASE W At the Usual Rate How much wilt thou ake for that suit of armor, Lance? Sir Lancelot Three cents an ounce King Arthur tifetfy .... i mm w I Sire. a 9 . sew CO. MORRISON-MERRIL- L Distributors at Celotcz Predicts Salt Lake City. Utah V LEA.H 1535 CeloteX l APPRECIATE BUT THAT JUST WHAT no "fOU about the vo& TALK I It's first-clas- s mail. The expression, "the line of least resistance", means the line or course of procedure toward any goal along which the resistance of any opposing element is minimal. Utah Certified Pullorum Tested Chicks Rhode Island Reda, White Barred Ply month Rocks, for immediate deUeary. Headquarters far Hart Caa brooders, for natural, artificial, er tank Aise the can be esed anywhere. (is, new Sol-H- ot Radiant. Phone, write er wire fer prices and complete information. Lte-horn- RAMSHAW HATCHERIES 8M7 South State Street C. C No, Stt Salt Lake City, Utah TIMPANOGOS HATCHERY 101 Soath 7th East Prere. Utah C C Ne. 10 Stingrays Sting Fishermen Stingrays of South America lurking in the mud sting fishermea who accidentally tread on them. per week will be paid tar article the beat en "Why yoa shoo Id asa lutsrmoealain made Goods" Similar te sboT. Send ysar alary in preae er versa ta Intermoantsia Predacta Cat $3.00 nip. P. O. Bos Itii Salt Lake City. If year story appears tills column yea eeiee check for - Week No. 1511 W.N.U. $3.00 Salt Lake City f |