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Show THE PAGE SIX TIMES-NEW- Thursday, September 6, 1934 NEPHI. UTAH S. THE FEATHERHEADS TWlS -- E5S I PUT SOWS AROUWD AND UMDER TiMR REALLY TO Egg-cella- G STOP MY -- TVtese busies A KID SUCH PIACEWDE 'EM! CMiCKEKiS ROM - IMT S- mm VMM AT THUslK r COIAtMG- Scraps. nt A ERAIm! HE'LU HIS CHICKBMS MAVB WESTS OytB, AND THetJ HE'LL KEEP THEM TMEKJ TOMORROW I'LL COMB OUT AMD GATHER. CM UP WMILB FRIEWD . NEIGHBOR. 15 LOOKiNGr' LIKE SOME VOTERS IV I "What Is your Idea of disinterested patriotism ?" "A brass band." answered Senator Sorghum. "It will pluy with equal enihusliiHm for any kind of a political procession that manages to get the ritflit of wiy," w ft Re AFTER HOUS THE Overstudy "A man oiufet be a ntudent all hi days to hold a position like yours," remarked the admiring constituent. "That Is very true," answered SenaA dear old lady wai chocked at tor Sorghum, "anil, like a student, I the lurid language of two electri- get so weary of hard lessons that I cian who were working In her am going to organize a movement to Include a sports page In the CoFf bouse, and complained to rhe Itecord." In due course the two men gressloual Washlngtou were sent for and asked for an ex- Star. planation. His Idea "Well, air." said one. "It was like this. I was up the ladder and I let Sunday School Teacher Why was the hot lead fall on Kill. It went It that Duvld said he would rather clown his neck. And Bill, be said to be a doorkeeper In the house of the me, 'Vou really will have to be more Lord? Bright Boy So he could go outcareful, Jack." side If he didn't like the sermon. 1'atbfluder Maguslne. And He Gel Aw.y With It "Your confounded hair restorer Unutterable Emotion has made my hair come out more than ever!" grrowled the customer. "Now, then, what should a polite "Ah, you must have put too much little boy say to a lady who has on, sir I" replied the quick-wittegiven him a cent for carrying her barber. ''Made the hair come all the grip?" "I'm too polite to say it, madam." way out, Instead of only halfway." . BELIEVE IT. OR NOT emu-pun- 3v BrTJOlW-li- . FINNEY OF THE FORCE irToP o TU' NEWELL, A W MRS SKI OOP A4' WHY Th FERPL.IXEP MAM L ILnow i'm womderiM') chm surprise? Not on the Job 11?- - rC-v'- 7I II kU To OET To HOW BfWAD M" TRBETS ARCH AM - y. Boston NO HURRY Transcript Dining to Discord "Society," said Miss Cayenne, "reminds me of a minstrel show." "Where they say 'Gentlemen, be seated'?" "Yes. Only they say, 'Ladies, be seated And then the 'music' starts I By GEORGE STORM BOBBY THATCHE- R- To The Cove! r a ceo wuiT yoU ' UST IM My POSITION e VOUR NVITATIOuui AlNT SO HOT... YOUK-FL1CMT WOULD OXLy -- rvc-,,n- LEMD 1.1 BUT SHOT MOUTH-PIECWOULDHT A, DONB WU E. M- A C?EDENC6 TO SICH CHARGES the4.C CRAVB Aim T ...... MO LIMB. AMD OLD JULAJK WIU. B9 THERB WITH A COOO'-..Y- OU T wb khow eesr wHATfe WAS DUMB EMOUOH n COODS , CAUGHT WITH THE GA.W- - Killed Off Sarcastic Boss So you want to get off this afternoon. I suppose your grandmother Is dead." Office Kid Naw, she ain't, but that gag of your Is a dead one. Brooklyn Eajle. aud WE'LL. TAKES HIM to the cove WHERE HO MORE OOHH Down LAWS cam fci .i nr : i Doubtful Film Star (newly marrled)- - -- 4nd Is this your home? Bridegroom It Is, precious. "I could teach you to swim In three "Say, It looks mightily familiar. Are you sure I haven't married you lessons." "But 1 don't want to learn that before? London ast. We're going to be here for a Another Side :ouple of months." "That fellow Is hlehlv educated. He must be smart." Contract Casualty Two men were getting ready for "Oh, he may be." resDonded the man In the street "But he worries a dip In a swimming pooL "lour shins are In pretty bad over things that I never beard of." one. "Hockey Louisville Courier-Journashape," remarked player?" How About It? "Oh, no," was the reply. "1 Just led back my wife's weak suit." Housewife (to subscriDtlon sales man) No, we don't want no maga Even Up e don't want no nothln. zines. Salesman How about a cheap Dorothy It must be quite three Fears since I saw you last I hardly grammar? knew you, you have aged so! Doreen Well, I wouldn't have Infallible known you either, except for that "I've got a new idea. Fortune In Tlt-BIt- L "KEEPING UP WITH THE JONESES' WHAT WHy, I ICAMTeCTA I ' Vep' SOOAWK OUT OP THE RADIO 300P IT JUST PUT aX J J NEW TUBS VTHAT RADIO LAST 1 JoLieiT BIcfHTJ'X rty rtM tJJ A3 DeAD eayPTIAM HUNH !' NoT A 50.UCAC S1 1 1 IH SOIM ?Ly ToE TO CALL OP TH' who SOLD HC THOX AwD JSAWk Trf t.Pe "rJ ,0eA" I f VEU. I I -- There ,Wa A Reason 1 tld. J BE 7711 L- WORK- V"'!!! W I fMll& -- ilress. ( 1 it" "What now?" "It's an alarm clock that emits the Evidence Mother Jane, do you know If delicious odors of frying bacon and Tohnny has come home from school fragrant coffee." Boston Transcript Sf vet? Jane I haven't seen Is hiding under the I think so. but the cat film, stove. talk about the .old one for another Just a Vacuum Frosh (knocking at senior's door) year. You told me to call you In time for Poor Kitty your first class, but I didn't wake up "Your grandfather seems to be a myself. It's ten o'clock now, your ! By C. M. PAYNE - class Is over, and you can sleep as long as you want tT ,W Why Not? I can't afford an operation Hubby No, you'll Just have to S'MATTER POP It "Took" This Time All Right ,AK-- Wide now. p UMTOTBLU Mt ft if Just Practicing "But I've been told that you have proposed to three other girls quite recently." said the maid. "Oh, mere rehearsals In view of proposing to you, dear," said the little hard of hearing." "A little ! , Why, once he conducted family prayers kneeling on the cat." HIS PREFERENCE man. Blinks Hopeless Case I hear Jim's gone plumb soofey. Jinks Yes, the poor chap's mind has become as unbalanced as the national budget. Cincinnati Enquirer. owg e Concrete Our Pet Peeve Maybe So Mr. Spoon What kind of bells do Fred Mother, was there hair-oi- l you prefer? In this old bottle? Mr. Bell (who has a nagging wife) Mother Why no. That was glue. Dumb bells I Fred Maybe that's why I can't get my hat off. Just TJncle So you must never bite the hand that feeds you. Boston Boy Certainly not, uncle. It would be a hazardous undertak1" trol myself ing. The hand is almost certain to "You mustn't try, denrle. You'll be covered with deadly bacteria. : feel better after a good laugh." Too Early to Show Elation Affable Friend You are not look- Easily Satisfied "But I couldn't give you enough lng too bright today. work to keep you occupied." The Other No, I mustn't You "Missus, you'd be surprised wot see, the doctor has ordered my wife a little It takes to keep me occu- away and if I look pleased she won't pied." Sydney Bulletin. go. Tears Not in Order My boy, "My husband has run off with anconother women. Oh, I Just Jj M |