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Show JUAB COUNTY TIMES, NEPHI, UTAH OFFICIAL DIRECTORY. of July, all the frankfurter factories and trolley couipaules go Quick District District Judge, Fifth Judicial Joshua Greenwood. EJ. H. Ryan. Attorney Stenographer W. U Cook. State Senator J. II. Edghlell. State Representative Lawrence JWackett V. S. Expert In Charge Experiment Station Mr, Jones. Christmas Is Dying Outf Say Birsky and Zapp And Who Done It? The Fellow That Invented the jt County Commissioners P. J. Fen ell J. W. Whltmore, Perry B. Fuller Clerk Patrick J. Bonner. Recorder Will L. Hoyt. Treai-ireAsKTStor Attorney Ray Newton. J. H. McKnlght t Superintendent County Infirmary Thomas Vlckers. County Physicians Drs. Reea, Df Steele Bailey. Jr. MUNICIPAL OF- FICERS. NCPHI CITY OFFICER8. LEVAN TOWN. of Trustees Aim Calby. Trustees M. W. Mangelson, 8. P. Taylor, Alex Peterson, George Nellson. Marshal Nells Mortenson. Justice of the Peace Nells Schew. Health Officer Henry Hendrickson. Juab District Board of Education I. II. Grace, President; J. E. Taylor, A. P. Paxman. Clerk; Vf C. Andrews, Treasurer, and John T. Ksy. CA6T COUNTY PRECINCT OFFI- CERS. Mona. D. O. Young. Health Officer N. W. Ellertsoa. Nephl. Justice J. 8. Cooper. Constable II. T. Knowles. Health Officer Dr. T. D. Bees. Levan. Justice E. W. Tctcrton. Justice Constable IIKISTMAS ain't lea Is decorutlug graves on the thirwhat it used to tieth of May." "Still, In a way. It's a good thing that 'ju""-i- ' Christmas Is more or less a thing of the past," Zapp said, "because when Birsky la Wasser-bauer- 'a you tried to collect a bill from somerestau- body around Christmas time, it didn't muke no difference if he was retired rant. "Sure I know," from business except for a 10 per cent interest In a bathing suit factory, he Hlrsky spreudlng a slice would want you to wait till his Christof rye bread with mas rush was over. Also people didn't mustard as he give no orders because It was around waited for an or- Christmas, Hlrsky, and Just because It der of kreploch wus near Christmas aud they claimed they could use all the mouey they soup, with tebeches to could get, your creditors wanted you to follow. "Former times If a retail dry- - pay bills which you hnrdly knew you goods concern didn't got half their owed on account of not receiving the salesladies faint on 'em every night second monthly statement yet. Furfor two weeks before Christmas, their thermore it you owned a tenement creditors would come down on them house, you'd got difficulty collecting and ask them to discount their bills. the November rent because the tenNowadays If a cuxh girl gets a bead-ach- ants said It was so near Christmas, and that's the way it went, Hlrsky. People that's big alreudy." treuted Chrlstmus not as a holiday, but Hlrsky nodded sndly. "Christmas Is dying out," he de as an excuse. The wonder is it ain't clared. "The people is getting too died out altogether." "The wholesaler wouldn't miss it If wise, Zapp. It used to be thut If you wanted to push your stickers, wheth- It did," Hlrsky commented. "Helleve er It was handkerchiefs, socks, neck- me, Zapp, for every child that lays ties, oder gloves, all you had to do awake the night before Chrlstmus was to wait till the first of December, thinking what his parents are going mark 'era up 50 per cent over the regu- to hutid him the &ext morning, there is lar retail price for fresh goods, put fifty manufacturers counting sheep 'era In red puper boxes, y'uuderstutid, jumping over fences, trying not to ind your customers practically used think what some of their customers in blackjacks oa each other to get at the the retuil drygoods trude Is going to lountcr where the goods wus dis hand them after the second of Januplayed. Christmas silver articles was ary. It don't require much water to He also good sales. I seen butter illshes drown a slinky drygoods retailer. jo like hot cakes, which the salesladies can sink like a stone In two days' rain 'Gets Majensaure From Eating Frankwas warned not to dust them off nilt during the week before Christmas." furters." feathers even, on account it might "Don't I know It?" Zapp said. "If icrulch the silver plate and show the the Chrlstmns presents that the whole- public accountant, Birsky, I figure that irnss underneath. But that's a thing salers give by mistake to shaky retail If IX) per cent of Chrlstmus choppers f the past now. And who done it. drygoods men was put on trees the followed Miss Morgnn's advice, Birsky, the drygoods stores would shut down s around Christmas, and all them would not only take a vacation lu the summer time, but In the winter time also; and then the question Is, how is them salesladies going to raise money for their winter vacations?" "Miss Morgan would get up a sub scription maybe," Birsky suggested. MCI said, ge-full-te Mayor Alma Hague. A. Councllmen H. Bellliton, Thomas- - llalley, James GarretL Jr Mark liigler, George O. Ostler. Recorder A. V. Gadd. Treasurer J. H. Latimer. Attorney T. H. Burton. Marshal Samuel Linton, Jr. Justice of the Peace Wra. Stout Street Supervisor Jas. B. Riches. Quarantine Physician Dr. T. D Rees. Building Inspector I. H. Grace. Chief of Fire Department N. A. Keilson. Superintendent of Water Works A. t. Cowers. Members of Board of Health Dr. T. D. Rees, Alonro Ingram, Win. G. Orme. Sexton C. E. Bigler. President Board Illustrations by BRIGGS e, sule-liitile- "And iffll 11 F. No. 1G meet every Sat tirday evening In I. O. O. F. hall. Vis iting brothers cordially Invited to at tend. HERBERT IlonERTS, N. O. JOHN S. COOl'LR. Secretary. "People Treated Christmas Not Zapp' It was the feller thnt Invented the paying: 'lo your Christmas shopearly.'" ping tATTER-DASAINTS' MEETINGS "Who did invent it?" Zapp asked. "I hhould know who Invented It!" Sunday School. 10: JO. Soota ward Birsky exclaimed. "But whoever he svt High School building; Nephl ward was, Zapp, he put a bigger crimp In t Tabernacle; North ward at meet the cbenp handkerchief business than Ing bouse. the feller who Invented rhinitis tablets, M. I. A. Sunday, 7 p. m. Pouts because If you are doing your ChristWard High School building; Nph: mas shopping aronnt the first of Octoward at Tabernacle; North ward al ber when all them poor fellers thai meeting house. mns summer hotels and bathing pa Tuns ward every Primary South Is saying to themselves: 'Now 4a r at Tabernacle; Nephl every Frl vlllon It warm, Zapp. handkerchiefs for gets at ward day at Tabernacle; North rolds are the furthest from your meeting house every Friday. Priesthood meeting every Mondai thoughts. Also children whose moth-In ers do their Christmas shopping evening at the Tabernacle and Norti get school supplies September Is apt ward meeting house. ward South and first Relief Society third Thursday In each month at 1 p. m. Nephl ward first and third Norte Wednesday In each month. ward first and third Thursday In aaovtb, at respective meeting bouses 't i I 's at A I Christmas 10:30. s WdHoir s4 t f V -- 3Ti r " r t as a Holiday, but as an Excuse." way other Christmas presents arc, trtey would rover all the redwoM groves lu California. But it ain't the retailers' fault, Birsky. fometlmes the feller Is playing In hard lurk like a merchant like I used to sell goods to by the l.nme Felix Immerglick out In which a couple of 'years ago Inst Christ nin he spoolnlir.ed on sleighs, skates and furs, and froia I cemlHT 15 on they got stirh a wsrt.i spell In Cincinnati that the hM kerp-er- s figured should they or should they not open the roof gardens stnln. So the following year Immerglkk cut out the sleighs and skates and laid in Worries, children's loks and a very attractive line of umbrellas, and says that It's a wonder with his lurk be didn't also buy stock in a hln of artificial Ice factories, te- ciljse on the day he received the goods In ovemter the thermometer ges down to xero on him and stays that wny till a wek after his next sprlt.g Clix-ltinat- l. ch-n- ruUNHb loot MAKERS OF JEWELRY '100 . " v. y "V iff it. Millinery opening. Can you Usme such a feller that be settles with his cred- ltrs 30 Cents on the dollar?" "Listen, Zapp," Birsky said, "a feller could alwsys on either a warm pin bis bnst-uor sn InaJld Christmas, a cold wife, whereas the figures show that the average of real cold Chrlsfmasc aln t no more than the average of real Attorney at Law Public Office In Rooms 1 and Notary 2 Ostler BMg "Thinking What His Parents Are Go-l- g te Hand Him Next Morning." instead cf sleigh. Iiecnuse a shopper Heeeawartera fee Travel!; Men. sin't got no Imngtnntlon. Znpp. Hhe 'Tew elegaatty appnlated trees ais boys what's In season, sn-- If she was oil ittui heat, saffc. la. Oee doing her Christmas shopping ss early mmrt as th Fourth of July, y'tinlTstnr.'l, eae WaA mth s aaex Phosie 21. she would come hom with firework. "ftsy," Zflj p snld, flipping the ringers of his right hand at Birsky, "storekeepers aln'f allowed to sell no more fireworks around the Fourth of July. It's Bps Inst the law." "I know It," Birsky continued, "and The Times from your neighbor If people couldn't shoot off flrpTrfcer around th Fmirth of July sod couldn't when you can get it for Im than U Is shop around Christmas, all It that It should be a snspended sentence for eating torkey on Thanksgiving, and the only pleasure we got left In Amer- - FORREST HOTEL DONT BORROW Three Cents Per Week sl"V ht o CITY Now U the MKN AND WOMKN. tlnieto Umrn the barber trxla. Ba mmmmm bare In grsstitainsml. Specie! rste Bow open for SO de?e. Duly iirturi time required. Toole luralsbed eud commUelon paid while lean tog. Call or writs Moler Haber School, IS Clou Bierolal St.. Halt Lake City. Utah. WAHTFD W1MH 1 1.W Start the day right especially when rha weather Is trying upon one's, an' go nerves.. Start It by being In giwd huto echool. mor by refusing to be annoyed. Don't An' da my sums. get excited about anything; there tra An' clean the walks 'thout waltln' to b told really nothing ezcttlug early In thej ThouKh I ltke aleddln' better, as a rule, morning. Make the most of every-- j Or bun.lln' torts But nothin' ain't a thing ubout you and determine Inj bad your own mind that come what may When Clirlatmas cornea. you are going to accept It without com-- i When Christmas cornea, I'd juat aa Hut plaint, and there will be little cuuaaj Slve hair for complaint, says the Dayton News. to the baby, an' take care Mr If we could start the day with a, v cooky About the crumbs. Hmlle, there would be no trouble for u It's fun to make the little fellow lauxh. An' I don't mind hie taiteln' ev'rywhnre through the hours to follow. If w lie can't help beln' little! I'm not mad would refuse to become peeved. nnth4 When Christmas cornea. Ing would peeve us throughout the dayj When Chrlstmns comes, I don't forget to There is more In this thing of getting Klve aturted right than the average muii) My ahoea a wipe, an' scrub my eara a uiuy suppose. lot Ever notice a good engineer, how hi Ttll my bead hume. too An' mother uys, "That's boy's good tarts the train? He sits there gazing to live!" the track. He bus oiled the engine But I'm not 'fratd of dyln", 'cause I'm up mid rarcsncd It n little and gazed at it, not No different from always only glad admiringly. He clasps the throttle with When Christmas comes! faith lu It ltut he doesn't Jerk It, ori Abigail Williams Burton, in December pull it recklesaly. He presses it slightly, bt. Nli holm. some way, end the muscles In his arm contract gently, and the steam hlen aj What to Give for Christmas. and the great wheels start to ttiru bit Gifts for men: Tohncco Jars, Ink as as If a child were turning gently wells, shaving mugs, nsli trays, match them. They revolve a little faster, ami boxes, combs, hut marks, handker a little fuster, and the train In under coat wutch chains, fobs, chiefs, hang full fcpet'd with never a Jolt or Jerk. ers, hat brushes, clothes brushes, bath Well, that's exactly the way we ous;ht robes.x smoking Jackets, poeketbooks. to sturt the duy. We ought not to ex-- , hill files, cud buttons, books, or subpect to t under full speed at tlx) scriptions to magazines nnd furni pa There should be no Jolting, no Jump. pers. The wheels ought to uiovo Jerking. For women: Kings, chains, lavolgently, at the start and wet lleres, bracelets, bat pins, sleeve but slowly, otiKht to work ourselves to full presi tons, tiianlrtire sets. Jewel boxes, gilt sure us as the engineer gel card hat cases, brushes, bis traingrudually clocks, Then we'll 0'id o underway. combs, toilet sets, toilet articles and of power uu-t- , smooth and truck plenty perfumery, fountain !cns, silk or em we'll be nhle to bring the train !;iti broidered waists, blrthstone rings, Mn-at night villi never un Injury hand bug, pictures, mirrors, or bunk the a to passenger aud the machinery la books and bank Christmas comes, mind the cold. WHENlike to get up prompt X never gi-- hhn'. good Clinging to an Ideal. "I told my boy that Santa Claus Is only a myth." "Iluw did he take It?" "II didn't win much Impressed. He merely remarked that every great nnd good man bns to be subjected to some kind of unfavorable comment." Dont's for Parents. ChrMmn week don't s for pa- t, torfamillns: Ifcm't ojx-- bureau J5 drawers. Ifcui't look Into clos- - t, in cts. When the collar button roll the chiffonier or the bed. don't ptirMie It; It I better to t thy collar go loose than jjj to rik the premature revelation . neckties J5 i, of the CliriKtmas p or lare curtains. Be blind, bo trt '5 tl blind and again, be blind 5, j n un-b-- siM-ks- 1 a j' ) 7X Billions In Checks. The great bulk of all payments Inj this country Involve a debit on tht Itooks of a bank. Mostly they are uiuI by means of a cheek, which is churt'-'- J to the drawer's account Iteronlcli lcariiigs of bank checks bint ear utnounted to a hundred and lht billion dollars. Iiut, as we metitioiu- a little while a o, clearings involve only thoce checks that are dcoiUed in hoinp bank other than the one upon which they are drawn, end In cities large enough to maintain clearing bouse asMK'latlons. 17 An Investigation by I'.rntKtreet's !r cities Indicutc debits are two and that total bank, a half times th amount of clearings. Tll would Imply! that payuituts made. year throuH bauks In cities large i tiouuli to maintain clearing Ikhikc association were) lat .', the Saturday Add to that tiaynients In lesser cities and towns. d you will hnv an approslmatel t notion of tho smouiit of money . it passes from one hand to anothea In the cotire of a year the amount, that In one way or another we pay nur selves for all eichange of goods, serve Ices and so on. It makes a prwdlgloua nearly $,V.orvi" tvening I'ost obseftes. file. Spain After Our Tourists. Bpaln Is making an organised effort to divert Amoflcnn travel to that country. This algn of enterprise In Lord Hallsbury once called on of thi "dying nations" of the earth Is creditable, t'nqnestlonably American tourists could Include) Hpnin In their Itiner- tbl 'r 1 r "j'a r n .i; ; ary with much greater pleasure Js 3- nn-- t profit than divers other toiropean countries that make small return for the annoyance of travel and the raand pacious charges of Inn ke. other thoroughly conimerrlnlized gentry that live off Americans. Hut It may l that Spain bns twgtin little too late. Arrnticenient hnvej been msde to divert a large part our American lourit trnde to America Itself. St. loiis I'ost-- ipati'h. s wive." "flure I know, Birsky, hot figuring ha dotie the ont the average is most harm to poker, pinochle, the Fourth of July, Christmas and all them thine that former lime people enjoyed ' m.'.nlng chances on. Take, for In stance, the Fourth of July, snd n lot cf people which considers even safety mstrhe gefnhrllrh goes to work and figure that out of every million peopl that shoots off firecracker, one and seven hundred and fifty-twone thou ssn'ltbs fe.ple gets burned, so they put tbe fireworks msnufartnrers out of business, and now Instead of setting off fireworks people goes tn the slore or trolley parks on the Fourth; and as soon as It gets figured out that of every million people that goes to trolley parks and Coney Island, six and ninety-seven gpts from eating frankfurters and run over by trolley cars on th FcurLh SALT LAKE STSXET Begin the Day in Good Humor and De, termlne Not to Complain, and Not the Result p Thos. H. Burton MAIN JUST REFUSE TO BE ANNOYED, Santa Claus Captured -- p to all our BOYD PARK, t,l-tit- h irriirt-,t-- Merry Friends. ioni-lMj- I. O. O. PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH. exiH-nse- r Modern Woodmen of America No meets every Tuesday evening t Woodman hall. Visiting Woodmen welcomed CHARLES STEPHENSON. Consul. ' J. 1L LATIMER, Clerk. ert the proteU after the of collection Were dedurtd would sup- six hundredths of a Krt twenty-thresaleslady for C.0"S hours. Uirky." Zapp concluded, "which the trouble with them that figure out the averages Is that they doii't roushh-human beings as men and women, but as frnrtlous ausgiTeekoned to hundred thousandths yet. Also It's a good thing to ficure out the avernges on the percentages of people that K't ofT fireworks on ! dwn't get burnel, and the percentage of poplt? that It wouldn't do a bit of haru to if tiny a hou;;ht onre in a while fur present. Useful or otherwise. In olhi-words, Birsky, If you're going to reckon up the averages on anything, tl.e best way I to figure how It will nrtWt one hundred one hundredth) f t lie out of the year, people twelve nnd then go to work snd g"-- f up the for the Prevention of Prevention to Societies and limit th tnemt-rhliione hundred million Americans. Most of US Would Jol.l It." e Richard Iveraoo. Sunday school Cforlsttrj&js Gonr)ts I e tO.700. , Vben dry-goo- Judge of Juvenile Court T. II. Bur ton. Probation officer James E. Mem-SnO-t COUNTY By MONTAGUE CLASS Parke. 6urveyor V. E. Ekloff. Sheriff Angus R. McDonnell. AST jt j ." "Aber, what's that got to do with Christmas?" Birsky asked. "I'm coming to that," Zapp said. "People ar commencing to figure averages on Christmas also. Take Miss J. P. Morgan, and she figures that out of every million Chrlstmus presents displayed in stores a certain percentage of people buys something which they couldn't afford and gives It to a certain percentage of people which uln't got no use for It at all. So she goes to work and gets up a Society for the Prevention of Useless Giving, and consequently a certuln percentage of stores loses a certain percentage of customers which formerly had a rotten bank account and a good disposition, and has now got a good bunk account and a rotten disposition." "But Miss Morgan done this for a lot of salesladies which used to spend their money so foolishly at Christmas, Zapp, that they had nothing left to take a vacation with la the summer time." "That may be so, Birsky," Zupp said, "and while I ain't exactly a certified New Everybody Buys Presents Out of Season and Holidsy Sales of " Sticker" Goods Are Doomed. J J Saying: 'Do Your Shop, ping Early." County, T, H. Q. i - I f V W Incomptfte View. To yotj enjoy sfiag balir a game of foots "I never see? one In Its entirety," T piled Miss t'eyenne. "The exritf-tnn- , Is so Intense that I am constantly shutting my eyes In fesr that somebody la troing to get hurt." Thrifty Japanese. The report of the postal savings bank department of Japan, says tho Japan Times, shows the amount of savings has greatly Increase, during th last year. The tnot noteworthy In the number of dcps'tor and amounts of deposits Is seen It Korea. Mawhnrfa snd Formosa. Tb ftnmber of drw1tr at the end ft Jaly was 14Jti". Cn. end th"tr total amounted te fl.Tl.iao.OH. Tlio Incress during the year In the nnm-h- ft of drtsltoT was 170,4V, w1U a total of 27.1,-.2rd-j- S. |