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COM' i yN. x I ? g j vlX 'J j j2jNGUpwi7H THE JONESES" 1 xcam'JUs JJ Be SEEltM' A8 Nine cm. L You Can't Fool Clarice WHAT DO "YOU KVEANJ vouu. see HIM AT NINE P.M.? WHY! MV DEAR LITTLE GiRU-TMAT GiRU-TMAT WA9 CHARUE hvnesJ HE'3 MsTTERESTEOj IN OLD NOWES. V6AH? . jic3 ir COME w over nn"""1 HELP HIM READ THE ascriptions ON TWO pteCES OP old txzi' .-.,2 iicii th' LAST TIMS VOU WENT OVER TO HELP HIM READ THOSE T COST VOO TWENTY DOLLARS !! VOlLU 54D0T KjO DICE TH13 EVENING, Jf-rr- On the SI Funny Side HEREDITY CLEARED UP "Can you deflne heredity for us. Johnny?" Er, yessura. It means If your grandfather didn't have any children, chil-dren, then your father probably wouldn't have any and neither would you, prob'ly. Montreal Star. Number Two "Let me see," said the minister who was filling out the marriage certificate and was uncertain as to the date, "this is the fifth, Isn't lir "No, sir." returned the bride Indignantly, In-dignantly, "this is only my second." Brooklyn Eagle. But Try and Get It Steward (on board ship) Madam, I've attended to you as best I can, and I've supplied every want but you still seera unsatisfied. What do you want nowT Lady (seasick) I want the earth. NOT SO CERTAIN Governor Park, of Missouri, said the other day In Jefferson City : "The isolation Idea la getting popular. pop-ular. So far as. our relations with Europe are concerned many of t8 feel like the young wife. "A genial old bachelor said to her: 'I asked your husband at the club last evening if he would marry you again, supposing he had hist life, to live over, and be said he certainly would.' "'He certainly wouldn't, snapped the young wife." Philadelphia Bulletin. Judicial Revenge Officer Your honor, this chauffeur ran bis car into th' show windy av a millinery store. Judge What millinery store? 1 Officer Mme. De Stlckum's. Judge Discharged. That's where my wife buys .hex bats, Brooklyn Eagle. Flattering to Neither "Hollywood stars are Just like anybody any-body else," says an Interviewer. "It is a question," writes L, W., "whether "wheth-er this will be resented moHt by the stars or everybody else J" Boston Transcript. Bell Out of Order "Are there many debt collectors coming to your door?" "More than I care to admit nov its up pro jSJb TO YOU " nf ' """"""" Scapa Flow Scapa Flow is a small body of water, an arm of the ocean which lies between the Orkney Islands of Pomona and Hoy, north of Scotland. It is about 14 miles long and nearly Inclosed. Scapa Flow offers a deep, safe harbor and was the operating base of the British grand fleet during dur-ing the war. The Word "Slogan" The word "slogan" is derived from the Gaelic "Slaugh-ghalrm," which Is what the Scots called their clan rallying cries for summoning men to battle. Literally translated it means "cry of the host" In modern bus! ness any pithy sales message or statement of policy Is termed a slo gan. Origin of Tapioca ! Tapioca is the food starch obtained ob-tained from the roots of a tropical plant called the cassava. The roots are washed, then cut, ground and reduced to a pulp, after which tha mass Is strained .to separate the starchy particles from the fiber. The starchy mass is dried on hot Iron plates, forming the pearl tapioca. Lotteries Banned Lottery was such an easy plan of getting money In the early days of the state of Ohio that the General Assembly, Jealous of so many profiting profit-ing In that way without permission, In 1807 passed a law forbidding all lotteries except those authorized by the legislature. Jailed 'for Non-Payment In 1830, according to a report pub lished then by the Boston Prison Discipline society, they were Jailing 10,000 persons annually for nonpay ment of debt in New York ; 7,000 in Pennsylvania ; 3,000 In Maryland, and 3,000 In Massachusetts. Honors for Mr. Owl The owl is venerated by some Indians In-dians for his wisdom and given the rank of a minor god. Ducks, wild geese, mountain blue Jays, and various vari-ous other birds are held In high esteem es-teem and never bothered by Indian hunters. Ape Pick Coconut Nature, provided an excellent labor-saver in Sumatra In the climbing apes which are trained to pick coconuts, coco-nuts, when directed by their owners who stand under the trees and guide their animals by jerks on the rope, and by calls. Camoaflago In a too the zebra Is a conspicuous conspicu-ous object, but on the open veldt he Is almost Invisible at a few hundred hun-dred yards. The brnad stripes so blend Into the landscape that tbey appear to be part of IL Jangle Fire Rout Animal Disturbed by Jungle fires In the Singapore district of India, many tigers and panthers are believed to have reached an Island by swimming a mile across the Strait of Jobore. Plenty of Name Pelping, China, has been called Buccensively Chl'L Ten, Yu-Cbow. Nanchlng, Y e n s b I n g, Chung ta. Khanbalig. Ta-tu. Peiplng-fu, Peking, Pe-king, and then Pelping. Breakfast Food Art Popular , New Ideas, when worthwhile and1 put forward with persistent effort, always pay handsome dividends, as evidenced In the fact that cereal breakfast foods not so long ago' were unknown. Now they have become be-come universal dishes, and production produc-tion has climbed to more than 8100,000,000 annually. Carbon Monoxide Carbon monoxide, the colorless, tasteless and odorless gas that Is produced by motor car exhausts and various industrial processes, is so poisonous that one part In 2.000 parts of air sickens a person within with-in a short time and one part In 200 parts of air quickly causes death. Collier's Magazine. "Cuckoo" I the Word When life becomes desperately dull In many of the lonely outposts of Afghanistan, the soldiers play kukushka. They dodge around a blindfolded man, who fires a loaded revolver In their direction whenever they shout "cuckoo" at him. Apparently Ap-parently the object of the game Is to see how long they can play and live. Collier's, License to Keep Cow Licenses to keep cows are Issued by the London county council to 50 places in the County of London, most of these being in the East end. There are more than 1,000 cows kept In this way. First Notice of Aviation The navy first investigated tha possibilities of aviation far naval purposes In 1908, when two officers were detailed as observers for tha test of the Wright plane at Fort Meyer, Va- Largeit Spider The largest species of spider la the bird spider, which has a body two Inches long and a leg spread sometimes seven inches or more. It is found In Brazil and often catches small birds. Aaimals Suffer From Cancer Cancer has ben found extensively extensive-ly among members of the animal kingdom as cattle, horses, dogs, cats, birds, fish, mollusks and reptiles. Earth a Hug Magnet The earth is a huge magnet ITence It will draw to Its poles any electrified particles pouring upon It from without Man Must Be Busy Pe trouble bout Idleness." said Uncle Eben, "Is dat It's natural fob a man to want to be ma kin' some-thin.' some-thin.' If he can't be makln' nuffln else, he's liable to make trouble." A Family Tomb The Etep-pyrsmld built by the Pharaoh Zoser about 3000 B. CL, la found to be a family tomb, containing contain-ing other burials. Homer Birthplace in Smyrna? A Turkish archeologist Jealously guarding documents of his discovery, discov-ery, claims that Homer's birthplace was In Smyrna. Redwood Trees on Hawaii Island Of 10.000 redwood trees planted on the Island of Hawaii In the last ten years, 67.9 per cent have survived. |