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Show Editorials Yetta s Running The next presidential election is only two and a half years away, and in the ranks of the Republican Party rumblings are being felt as a way is sought to make up for the disasterous loss of 1964. Will Nixon run? Does Romney look good? How about Linsay? No one knows who will finally end up carrying the GOP banner. But in one party the question has been settled, the platform has been written, the campaign song has been composed and the feelers are out for national support. Yes, friends, Yetta Bronstein will run for President again in 1968. Yetta, you may remember, ran in 1964 under un-der the banner of the Best Party. Her campaign slogan was and is "Watch things get betta with Yetta." Her platform is simple but complete. It is (1) lowering the voting age to 18, (2) better government, (3) floridation, (4) National Bingo, (5) sex education, (6) stronger government. In a recent "Open Letter to the College Students of America," Mrs. Bronstein gave her reasons why students should vote for her. To quote from the letter: "I urge you to vote for me and help put a mother in the White House. I promise to run this great country with a strong arm, the same way I run my home. "Think of all the things your mother did for you: the feeding, changing, washing, ironing, telling bedtime stories, lying for you, crying for you . . . everything to make you big and strong. Now you can pay her back by putting me in office. I will represent all your mothers and act in their behalf for you." Mrs. Bronstein is looking for workers on the nation's campuses. She says if you are popular and can make fast friends, she needs you. She is available to speak to clubs, meetings and discussions by long distance phone as long as she doesn't have to pay the phone bill, and you should contact her by postcard, not collect call. Since we already know who the Democrat's candidate will be and the Republicans are still playing footsie, we hereby throw all our tentative support behind Yetta Bronstein. She'll be worth her weight in gold in foreign affairs alone. After all, who'd dare talk back to a mother? Having declared ourselves for the Best Party and mother Yetta, we ask you to keep the following things in mind for the next couple of years: Remember to take a pencil to the polls so you can write her name in. Don't mis-mark your ballot and spoil your vote for Yetta. Remember how many politicians in the past have cited love of mother as proof of their patriotism. |
