| Show EXCUSE novelized from the comedy of the same name illustrated rupert from 0 iha flay produced by henry W by tl K l lj co SYNOPSIS harry mallory la ordered to the philippines he and marjoree Marj orle newton to elope but wreck of taxicab pre their minister on the way to the train train Is tak ins on passengers porter has a lively lime with an I and ira lath rep a business fainn the hive an exciting time petting to the iraln I 1 ittle wellington bound for neno to ret a divorce boards train n maudlin condition later mrs arleara she Is also bound for reno with im object likewise mra bammy ehlt bomb letter blames mrs for her marital troubles classmates of mal imry decorate bridal berth rev and airs start on a vacation they decide to cut loose and temple removes evidence it his calling M decides to let mallory proceed alone but train starts ehtle they ara lost in farewell furs join mallory s classmates n giving couple wedding hazing marjoree Marj orle Is als traded ira lathrop woman hating bicheler bich elor discovers an old sweetheart anne cattle a fellow passenger mal lory anly hunts for a preacher among U e passengers mrs wellington hears little s voice later she meets mrs 1 mallori reports to mar jorie his failure to fand a preacher they aft ida to pretend a quarrel and mallory anda a labant berths CHAPTER XV continued and now he was sprawled and anor ing majestically among his many lug gages like a sleeping lion revenge tasted good to the humble porter it laevert like a candled yam smothered in possum gravy he smacked his thick lips over this revenge with nil the insolence of a servant in brief authority ho gloated over his prey and prodded him awake then mur aured with hypocritical deference excuse me but could I 1 see yo ticket for 10 seat certainly not its too much trouble grumbled the haaf asleener confound you the porter lured him on is you ebo you got one wedgewood wedge wood wag wide awake now and surly as any englishman before of cawse im shaw how dare you too bad but I 1 m to asit ou to a peek at it this Is an outrage but I 1 just na chelly got to fee it wedgewood gathered himself to gether and ransacked his many pock els with increasing anger muttering under his breath at length be produced the ticket and thrust it at the porter than you idiot are you con now the porter gazed at the billet with ill concealed triumph bassah I 1 s convinced mr wedgewood settled lack and closed his aies Is con that you Is in the wrong berth impossible I 1 won t believe you the englishman raged getting to his leet in a tury perhaps aull bellevo alsta tick el the porter chortled he says ten and ten across the way and down the road a piece this la outrageous I 1 decline to nwe you may decline but you move just the same the porter said reaca arg out for his various bags and car ralla the train moves and you croie with it wedgewood stood fast you bad no right to put me in here in the arst place the porter disdained ed to refute this blander he stumbled down the aisle with the bundles its too bad its too bad but you must come along wedgewood followed gesticulating violently here wait how dare ou and that berth Is made up I 1 dont want to go to bed now bista ticket says go to bald of all the disgusting countries heah don t put that than bean the porter flung bis loid anywhere and absolved himself with a curt 1 s got otha passengers to wait on now I 1 shall certainly report you to the company the englishman fumed Ya esah 1 p sume EO have I 1 got to go to beef now keal ly I 1 but the porter was gone ana the irate foreigner crawled under his curtains muttering I 1 shall write a letter to the london times about to add to his misery mrs whit comb came from the women s tod as she passed lam she prodded him with one sharp elbow and twisted the corner ot her heel into his toe he thrust bis head out with ahli fiercest how dare youl but mra was fresh from a pro longed encounter with mrs ton nl she flung back ft venomous klare that sent the englishman tc over the porter reveled in his victory alli ke bad to dash out to tho vestibule vesti bult 0 o civo vent to hilarious yelps ol 01 when he had regained corn atut h came bach to mallory anc M or alto to ay ff yo berth is empty sab ahall 1 make it up mallory nodded and turned to mar borle with a sad good night darling the porter rolled his eyes again and turned away only to be recalled by marjories voice porter take this old handbag out of here the porter thought or the van quashed lathrop exiled to the ing room and he answered that be longs to the bemman what owns this berth put it in number one Marj orlo commanded with a queenly gesture fhe porter obeyed meekly wondering what would happen next he bad no sooner deposited lathrope Lath among the incongruous white ribbons than marjoree Marj orle recalled him to say and porter you may bring me my own baggage yo what missus 7 our handbags idiot mallory ex pla ined peevishly I 1 ain t been no handbags or you alls the porter protested you all dlan t have no handbags when you got on this cah mallory jumped as it he had been shot good lord I 1 remember we leflem in tho taxicab the porter cast his hands up and walked away from the tragedy mar borle at malbory in horror vo had so little time to catch me train mallory stammered marjoree Marj orle leaped to her feet im going up in the baggage car for the dog for tny trunk and now mallory annihilated her completely for he gasped our trunks are on the train ahead marjoree Marj orle fell back for one moment then bounded to her feet with shrill commands porter porter I 1 want you to stop this train this minute 1 the porter called back from the depths of a berth this train dont stop till tomorrow noon marjoree Marj orle had strength enough lor only one vain protest do you mean to sav that I 1 ve got to go to san fran casco in this waist a waist that has seen a whole day in chicago the best consolation mallory could offer was companionship in misery he pushed forward one not too im maculate cutt well this Is the only linen I 1 have don t speak to me snapped mar jorie beating her heels against the floor but my darling go away and leave me I 1 bate you mallory rose up and stumbling down the aisle flounced into berth number three an allegory of despair about this time little ington having completed more or less chaotic preparations for sleep found that he had put on bis pajamas pyjamas hind side foremost alter vain efforts to whirl found quickly and get at his own back lie put out a drowsy frowsy head and failed for help say porter porter 1 I m still on the train answered the porter coming into view you 11 have to book me up the porter rendered what aid and correction he could in s toilet wellington was just wide enough awake to discern the undisturbed bridal chamber he whined ajsa porter that rice trap A rent they going to flop the rice trap the porter shook bis head sadly dont look like that hoppers agoan to flip that dog on bridal couple is done divorced a ready 1 CHAPTER XVI good night the car was settling gradually into peace but there was still some murmur and drowsy energy bhones con to drop heads to bump against upper berths the bell to ring now and then and ring again and again the porter paid little heed to it he was busy making up number five ira lathrop s berth tor marjoree Marj orle who was making preparations she could for her trousseau less bus bandl first night out anally the englishman who had at most rung the bell dry of electricity shoved from his berth bis indignant and undignified head once more the car re sounded with the cry of paw tab pavitar Pa vitah the porter awed up with noticeable deliberation did you ring sah did I 1 ring paw tab you may draw my tuli at eight in the draw yo what cab the porter gasped my tub ba ath tub baeth tub lawdy man Is you allow in to take a ba ath in the of course I 1 am dlan t you have one bafo you how dire you of cawse I 1 dd ep that s all you git do you mean to tell me that there Is no tub on this beastly train wed gewood almost fell out of bed with the shock of this news we do not carry tub sno ah therea a ot of tubs in san fran casco though iso tub on this train tor four days but whatever does one do in the meanwhile one just waits acsah one and all waits its what it la bassah Yas sah said the porter and mumbled as he walked away but tha weather la getlan cooler he finished preparing marjonen Mar jonea bunk and was just suggesting that mallory retreat to the smoking room while number three was made up when there was a commotion in the i L corr laor and a man in decked overalls dashed into tho car ills ear was slightly red and h held at arms length as if it were a venomous monster and he yelled say whose durn dog Is this he bit two men and he makes so much noise we cant sleep in the baggage car marjorie went flying down the alclo to reclaim her lost lamb in wolfs clothing and the returned prodigal yelped and leff d and told her all about the indignities be had been subjected to and his valiant struggle for liberty marjoree Marj orle seeing only stepped into the fatal berth number one and paid no heed to the dangling ribbons mallory eager to restore himself to her love by loving her dog crowded closer to her side making a hypocritical ado over the pup everybody was popping his or her face out to learn the cause of clamor among the bodiless heads suspended along the curtains ilka dyak trophies appeared the great mash of little wellington he had been unable to sleep tot mourn ing the wanton waste of that lovely rice trap when he peered forth his eye hardly believed themselves tk elusive bride and groom were actu ally in the trap the ben pheasant and the chanticleer but the net did not fall lie waited to see them sit down and spring the infernal ia chine but would not sit in fact marjoree Marj orle was muttering to harry tenderly now since he had won her back by his efforts to con solo she was muttering tenderly we must not be seen together honey go away see you in the morning N and mallory was saying with bitterest resignation good night my friend and they were shaking hands this incredible bridal couple was shaking hands with itself disintegrating then wellington determined to do at least his duty by the sacred rites tho gaping passengers saw what was probably the largest pair of pajamas in chicago they saw little smothering bade his giggles like a schoolboy tiptoe from his berth enter the next berth brushing the porter aside climb on the seat and clutch the ribbon that pulled tho stopper from the trap down upon the unsuspecting elop ers came this miraculous cloudburst of ironical rice and with it came little wellington who lost what little balance be had and catapulted into their midst like the offspring of an iceberg it was at this moment that mrs wellington hearing the loud cries of the panic stricken marjorie rushed from the women s room absent mind edly combing a totally detached sec alon of her hair she recognized ta mallar pajamas pyjamas waving in air and with one faint gasp on this train she swooned away she would have fallen but seeing that no one paid any attention to her she ered consciousness on her own book and vanished into her berth to meditate on the ghys whys and wherefores ot her husband s presence in this car dr temple in a nightgown and trousers roger ashton in a collarless estate and the porter managed to extricate mr wellington from his plight and stow him away though it was like putting a whale to bed mallory seeing that marjorie had fled vented his wild rage against tate in general and rice traps in particular by tearing the bridal bungalow to pieces and then be stalked into the smoking room where ira lathrop homeless and dispossessed was sound asleep with his feet in the chair he was dreaming hat he was a boy in Dratt leboro the worst boy in brattleboro Bratt leboro trying to get up the courage to spark pretty anne gattle and throwing rocks at the best boy in town charlie selby who was always at her side the porter woke ira an hour later and escorted him to the late bridal section marjoree Marj orle had fled with her dog as soon as she could grope her way through the deluge of rice she hopped into her berth and spent an hour trying to clear her hair of the multitudinous grains and as for ams his thick wool was so be priced that for two days whenever he himself bo TO BC CONTINUED |
