Show y vf 1 WED LIKE TO KNOW what we ask the rort lana when ft e know the ve noticed us with signals n to and fro what ahall we first discuss some people think we d better W hat Is a and what la whisky as it mara had such a drink as that perhaps wed better ask the chaps who talk to us rom mars through many million talles of space all sprinkled p er with stars it on that world do tar advanced which men of blence boost the have won the day and women rule the roost her heavy work well dear now that ve can afford a servant how does your housework go just splendid I 1 leave my heaviest work to her and she makes light of it you mean the bread making 9 too much devotion so your husband always stays in the house nights said one woman yes answered the other once hiram gets settled down in front of his fireside ou cant get him out 0 doors even to bring in an armful of wood sweet charity there Is a poor widow dying of consumption in a reeking tenement down by the rh er dear me I 1 am so glad you told me send her a couple of free tickets to our cantata ot queen esther right away I 1 puck paradoxical excellence Excelle ice do sou see that garp yes what of hera she graduated at once from the head and foot ot her class how could that be she studied as a toe dancer AT FIRST SIGHT howard and bow did that plain widow perkina capture the fastidious mawker coward oh took him out in her car and showed him a few hundred of her building lots howard ah I 1 see A case of love at first site so it does no borrow ever lasts for long the years have proved that true and happiness sometimes we know goes hand in hand with rue yes indeed what remains in one s memory like the old farm one can never forget it the old mortgage on the old farm sticks to the memory pretty firmly also great idea you people have a primary law out here how do you like it suits me first rate gives me a chance to take a whack at a bum con gressman without going outside of my perty to do it scared rabbit she it Is said that the rabbit sees behind as well as in front he that accounts for the little animal taking fright when he sees one of those peach basket hats coming or going yonkers statesman the place for it anxious writer how are you going to classify my article on events in aerial navigation and travel facetious editor sly dear sir we are going to run it under doings in high life A mighty pen farmer scrabble grass th feller as said he would rather write than be president wa nt so far wrong after farmer stubbs but we cant all get a dollar a word for a jungle story judge everything in the tobacco line joker do you keep smokeless tobacco clerk sure we do joker what kind Is lt clerk chewing tobacco of course cornell widow suspicious the first thing I 1 beard when I 1 ar rived was that you had been married and I 1 rushed over to gloat in the same fix 1 I dont know where jm going to sleep tonight to night bald the beggar neither do I 1 said air chudley Chu bley we re moving A clear record what do ou know about this mans reputation tor truth and veracity ite good I 1 understand he never gona fishing accomplished linguist harker great linguist he barker you bet he can talk in baseball college and auto why not say paw queried little tommy toddles what Is a lambkin A lambkin my boy anaw ered toddles sr Is a little lamb then paw continued tommy 1 I sooae the little nap you take after dinner Is a napkin ain t it BITTER MEMORIES passenger on branch line say why does the engine always set up such a piteous bowl at this particular glaid ah it was here the en elneer first met his wife A tip you who would keep your friend always in hla heart hold your place when iou have something for his ear say it face A resemblance noted what do you think of tariff bevla ion well answered farmer corn bossel it strikes me that the tariff it a good deal like the w eather no matter what kind sou get its pretty sure to ba bad for somebody s business the rising generation Is always repeating something his small boy said f es answered miss cayenne that boy must bo a wonder he Is the only person I 1 know of whose opan ions mr regards as more important than his own and turn about Is fair play charitable man to beggar woman pushing her crippled husband in a wheelchair and do you push your poor helpless husband about in this chair all day longa beggar woman oh not we take turn about blatter out of keeping they had no suitable gloves in the store we went to and that a a moat extraordinary proceeding why extraordinary because in the nature of things gloves are something which should al ways be found on hand useful article see here snapped the angry passenger this nickel you gave me is lead and has a hole in the middle I 1 know it sir responded the conductor calmly well a nice way to ruffle up a mans temper when he is going on a fishing trip that Is the reason I 1 gave it to you sir you can use it as a sinker stangl mrs gottron you never loved me you just married me for money gottron yes and got green goodal A safe bet the lambs they soon will gambol her and it can be foreseen A real cure tip it Is when they will gamble on the green an event anticipated and when do you expect your daughters wedding to bea why my daughter isn t going to be married she s a trained nurse you know 1 I know but I 1 thought ou said she was nursing a sick millionaire intellectual diversion that research man entertains come strange theories you have it the other way around answered miss cayenne those theories berve to entertain him wrong time to kiss did you ever see a fishing smack capsize no but I 1 once saw a boat turn over as the result of a fishing smack punctual there does he ever do anything on time oh yes he aulta work |